Tough Love
by flora.s.t
Summary: my version/vision of Steve and Kono. does not involve any main plot lines or Catherine or Jenna or Lori. at some point some stuff will be rated M cause that's how i do things.  but i won't change the story rating, because a lot of people filter ratings .
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first Hawaii Five-0 fic ever! And I'm super excited. I love these guys. It's kind of AU. It doesn't deal with any of the main plot lines or Catherine or Jenna. I just think that this would be a way for Steve and Kono to get together that I really like. **

**To anyone who reads my NCIS story "Coney Island", yes I will update. Eventually. I've been really busy but I promise to get on it soon. **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He couldn't stop reliving that moment.

The gunshot rang in his ears, somehow louder than the others flying through the warehouse. It was even louder than his own that had just killed the hostile before him.

He heard two more shots, but closer. He heard the sound of impact in soft flesh, a soft gasp and the dull thump of a lifeless body falling behind him.

He turned, quickly scanning he room as he went. All the hostiles were either down, or being arrested. Then he prayed that the body he was about to see was a hostile, but knowing it wasn't.

He would never forget seeing her beautiful face turned away from him, her dark, silky hair covering it.

He remembered murmuring her name to himself and falling to his knees next to her. He said her name again but she didn't move and he rolled her over so that her torso was on his lap. He pressed his fingers to her throat and found a pulse but also a large purple knot forming on the side of her head. She was only unconscious because of the hit to the head. She was still alive but barely.

He remembered unconsciously saying, "No, no, no, no, no…" as if it might rewind time.

He pulled his hand away from her left shoulder, feeling it sticky with blood. She had taken a hit, right on the edge of her vest. He wrapped his hand around back and felt for an exit. It was there, a through and through. From the angle it hit, he could tell that it probably hadn't hit her heart or any other vitals but she was losing blood. He reached down, undoing her Kevlar vest, to release pressure on the wound slow the blood loss. Then he reached up to undo his own, tossing it on the floor and following it with his shirt. He tore and folded his shirt into thick pads. He moved her onto the ground and placed a pad in each hand. He pressed them onto the entrance and exit wounds on either side of her shoulder, waiting for them to soak through before he placed fresh ones.

He looked up to see where she had been shooting. It had been a man on the balcony above.

It didn't make any sense. She had been on the other side of the warehouse. That hostile was in his range, not hers. Granted, that one had been behind him and he had never known that he was there. Then he had realized that she must have taken the bullet meant for him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

_She's alive, she's alive, she's alive._ That's what he kept telling himself as he remembered the moment. He focused on the warmth of her hand that he kept pressed to his forehead. He held it between his two, much larger hands, as he sat on the right of her hospital bed, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, head bowed forward to meet their entwined hands. He kept his eyes closed, trying to stay calm.

It was his fault. He knew it. The team was his responsibility, especially her. She was a rookie, not that she acted like it. She was his responsibility. That shooter had been his responsibility. The bullet had been meant for him but instead something possessed her to jump in front of it. The likelihood that the bullet would have even hit was small, which just made it worse in his mind.

At that thought, his face scrunched up and he shuddered before letting out a long sigh.

Then he felt it.

The slight twitching of her fingers, that had been still and lifeless in the 16 hours since the bullet hit her.

He opened his eyes and lifted his head to look at her.

Her beautiful, gorgeous, sweet, kind face was scrunched up, in a combination of confusion, pain and simply because she was waking up in a bright hospital room.

She groaned and began to open her eyes. He watched as her gaze focused, saw the bed and then moved towards him.

"Mmmh, boss?" she moaned groggily.

"Hey, kid," he whispered.

"Where's Chin and Danny?"

"Booking the surviving suspects and doing paper work. How ya feeling?" he asked quietly, sitting up and pulling one hand out to brush the hair out of her face. He let his hand stroke her forehead comfortingly as she started to talk.

"Like a fucking bus hit me." He smiled, glad to see that she still had her attitude. "What happened?"

"You were shot, stupid."

She closed her eyes. "Oh… right. The bullet… the shooter… aimed for your head, when you stopped moving… the angle… would definitely have killed you… you moved at the last minute." Her disjointed, sleepy but caring words set him off. He knew that they shouldn't have but they did.

His hand stopped moving on her forehead and her eyes opened. He pulled away from her dropping her hand. He stood and began to pace around the room.

"What's up boss?" she asked, surprised.

"What's up? What's _up_? What's up is that you put yourself in danger! What's up is that you took a bullet for me! What's up is that if anyone should be taking a bullet it's me for you, not the other way around!"

"Wow boss, you really have no respect for me," she said, on the edge of being angry, but too tired to go all the way.

"Excuse me? I have a ton of respect for you!"

"So, you can put your life in danger for us, can do all the stupid stuff that nearly gets you killed, but I can't? Do you think that you are the only one who feels a responsibility for the team?"

"No-"

"Look, I saw the shooter. I saw him aim. I saw his target. I saw you stop to drop that last guy. So I ran. I ran to warn you, to push you out of the way, but instead you took the shot at your guy and I had no choice but to take out the other guy and that just happened to put me in the trajectory. Do you think that I didn't think of the risks? Do you think that I didn't estimate where that bullet would hit me? I don't have a death wish!"

He had been standing perfectly still as she yelled at him, but now he walked quickly over to her, coming to stop right next to her head. He was much taller than her now and she felt herself shrink into the pillows.

"You estimated where the bullet would hit you, huh?" he said quietly, and frighteningly calmly compared to their yelling. It was cold and scary, but she could see in his eyes that it wasn't because he wanted to frighten her, but because he was scared. And frankly, that scared her.

"Well, what were you going for? As close as possible to your heart or as far away? The vest or your shoulder? Because I can tell you where it hit. Just off your vest. One and a half inches from your heart." He said the last part quietly, slowly, now purposefully trying to scare her.

She stared up at him her eyes widening slightly.

"One and a half inches." He held his fingers up, showing her the distance.

She swallowed. "Well… that's slightly closer than I estimated."

He stared down at her for a long moment, obviously in awe of her unwavering strength and resolve. She wasn't afraid of her insane act and that impressed him, especially since she was making a joke out of it.

"You're amazing," he whispered. His right hand came up to stroke her forehead again. She closed her eyes for a second and smiled at his touch.

He let his hand come down to rest on her shoulder as he reached back to pull the chair closer to her. He sat and took her left hand in his and raised his right hand to her face again. He stroked her forehead for a minute and then brought his hand down to cup her cheek and raise her chin. He looked her straight in the eyes, their faces only a few inches from each other.

"But if you ever do that again, I will personally kick your ass."

She laughed slightly. "Fine. But we take care of each other. That's what an _ohana_ does. And you can't take full responsibility for every accident or injury."

Now he laughed, moving to stroke her forehead again. Her eyes closed and he could see that she was falling asleep again. "Okay. I'll try. Now you go to sleep. You need your rest. But you also have a bad concussion so you're going to wake up every few hours. "

"Mmm," she moaned groggily, her eyes still closed. "So that's why I have this pounding head ache?" She forced her eyes open slightly to look at him. "Boss, will you stay?"

"Will I stay? Of course I'm staying. And this time, I am passing on that promise I just made and I am taking full responsibility. I'm not leaving until you are discharged and then you're coming to stay at my place until you are approved for duty, got it missy?"

She was smiling, her eyes closed again. "I got it boss."

"Steve. You really need to get used to calling me Steve."

"Yes Steve."

"Now go to sleep," he whispered, stoking her forehead. "I'll be here when you wake up."

As her breathing leveled out and her head and hand went limp under him, he whispered to her, "I'll always be here, sweetheart. Nothing you do or say will every make me feel less responsible or push me away. Nothing. I will always love you, Kono."

He meant it in a purely brotherly way. Sure he had feelings for her but they were only as a friend, he told himself. He leaned out of his chair to kiss her forehead gently. Then he sat back and set his watch to alarm in two hours.


	2. Chapter 2

"WOULD YOU GET AWAY FROM ME?" she snapped, half yelling. "God, I'm perfectly fine!"

He laughed under his breath. The last two times had been like this. It was the middle of the night and Kono was yelling at him again for waking her up and asking her questions.

"Come on Kono, just answer the questions. You only have to make it another six hours, then you'll be discharged and you can get out of bed and have a full night's sleep."

She groaned as she dropped her head back onto the pillows. Her exhaustion was making her irritable and childish. "I just want to sleep!" she whined, rolling from side to side to make a new dent in the mattress.

"I know, babe, but tonight they need to make sure you're alright. Other wise you'll have to stay here longer."

She groaned again, her frustration infectious. "Uggh, I hate it here! I hate hospitals! I think I've spent too much time in them. I just want a real bed and real food and not as many people and no more bright lights and to be able to get up and move at my own free will!"

"Hey! Questions first. In the morning we'll go home and you can have all those things."

She sighed and nodded, focusing her gaze on him.

"Okay. Number one," he said starting at the top of the list again. "What is your name?"

She rolled her eyes.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

When the doctor finished the list the next morning and Kono had been cleared to go home with supervision, Steve thanked him and helped Kono out of bed. He set the bag with a fresh change of clothes that she kept in her trunk on the bed and turned away so she could change.

"Steve, I'm gonna need some help," she said before he was all the way turned around.

He turned back to look at her. She was sitting, hunched slightly from the pain, on the edge of the bed. She looked small in the hospital gown.

"Oh, sure."

"Yeah, uh… It's just the reaching…"

"Trust me I know." He grabbed her pants and opened the legs, crouching in front of her to let her put her feet in. "There was this one time in Afghanistan, I got hit in one shoulder and the other bicep. I had matching slings for a week. Had to have one of the guys dress me."

She laughed and the tension she had felt about asking him to help her vanished. He always knew what to say in these situations. He pulled her pants up to her waist and then let her button and zip them herself. He turned her so that she was facing away from him, leaning her hips against the bed. He gently untied the hospital gown and she pulled it off her arms. She reached for the bra and pulled them on her arms, letting him grab the back straps.

"What link do you do?" he asked gently.

"The second," she said softly back. She shivered slightly as his hands ran under the strap to make sure they were straight and flat.

"Good?" he asked.

"Yeah."

He turned her back around and she suddenly felt self conscious as he leaned in close to her to grab the t-shirt that was behind her on the bed. She felt the heat from his body wash over and his musky scent mixed with a touch of cologne filled her senses. She took swallowed and tried to clear her mind of the things that popped in. He was her boss after all.

He opened the shirt for her and helped her get her injured arm in. Then he got her other one and pulled it over her head, giving it a last tug to get it to hang straight.

As he turned to zip the bag and grab her other stuff, she had to say it.

"You've obviously done this before."

He visibly paused, as if looking for the trap she had set. He seemed to decide that there wasn't one and began to answer. "Just before my dad sent my sister and I away, Mary broke her arm. She had just started wearing a bra and was really self-conscious. Thank God for our neighbor or I would have had to help her buy her stuff. Anyway, she couldn't get her bra or shirt on, so she got me to do this every morning for two months until her cast came off."

Kono smiled. She really liked Mary. She liked how tough Mary was and the resemblance, at least in character, to Steve was striking. She guessed that it had something to do with their childhood and their mother's death. She wanted to know more about them, about their childhood, about their family, about Steve…

_Wow, where did that come from? _

She shook herself out of _that _train of thought. Totally inappropriate. He was her boss. She liked to think that they were friends, family even, but first and foremost he was her boss. She would take whatever personal information she could, but it wasn't her place to ask.

As she slipped her feet into her flip flops, Steve opened the door of the hospital room and then came back to her. He offered his arm.

"Ma'am," he asked, mock gentlemanly.

She laughed and reached for the crook of his elbow. She pulled herself up off the hospital bed and they began to slowly walk out of the hospital. They went down to the car park to his truck. Her heart fluttered slightly as he helped her in before shutting the door and going around to his side. She had never seen him this tender and gentle before, at least not this close. It was a change from the normal super SEAL.

She watched the ocean and let herself drift as they drove. Just getting dressed and walking through the hospital had made her tired. She really had hit her head. She was glad she was staying with Steve. He would know just what to if anything happened.

As her eyes fluttered between sleep and wakefulness, she realized that they weren't going towards his house.

"Where are we going?" she asked tiredly, turning towards Steve.

"To your apartment. You're going to need some stuff if you're going to stay with me for a few weeks."

"A few weeks?"

"Yeah," he said, turning to look at her with an amused smirk, almost laughing. "Serious concussions take a while to recover from."

"You would know," she said, resigning.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?" he asked. There were enough jokes out there about his hard head.

"You're a SEAL," she said with a laugh. "You're like a genius in everything. I assume that you know how to take care of a concussion."

"Oh. Okay."

She laughed at him and he scowled but inside his heart was soaring. He loved her laugh.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

**Going to post again tomorrow, I promise! Ya'll have the right to send very angry messages if I don't. **


	3. Chapter 3

"Whoa!" Steve rushed around to Kono's side of the truck. She had gotten out on her own and was holding the door as she wobbled dizzily. "You okay?"

"Yeah," she said as he placed his hands on her shoulders to keep her steady. She looked up at him, her eyes wide, trying to keep them focused.

"Alright. Come on. We'll take it one step at a time."

"I can do it myself!" she said, pushing him away slightly as she walked by him and around the door.

He stood there, stunned. He wanted to protest. It made him feel helpless to not be able to help. When she wobbled as she pushed the door shut, he snapped to, coming to walk partially behind her, just in case. They started up the stairs to her second floor apartment and he found his hand hovering behind the small of her back. She leaned heavily on the railing but smiled to herself when she felt the warmth of his hand just off her back. She almost wanted to laugh at the way his forehead was wrinkled with worry.

They reached the top and she paused, catching her breath. He looked down worriedly at her. She nodded at him after a second, in an answer to his unasked question. He didn't quite believe that she was okay, but she pushed herself off the railing and began to walk down to her front door.

It was open.

Steve pulled his gun and motioned for her to stay back. He leaned into her and whispered in her ear. "Stay here until I say it's clear. Do you understand me?" he asked sternly, pulling back just far enough to see her face. They were only inches from each other as she nodded.

They stared at each other for a second before he pulled away and went to the door. He peered through the crack to make sure no one was there. He gently nudged the door open with the barrel of his gun. He nodded to Kono that it was clear so far and waved her back. She leaned her back flat against the wall and tried to keep her breathing calm. She didn't like that she was so worried about Steve going in alone. He did stupid stuff all the time and always came out fine.

Steve quickly searched the tiny apartment. Her living room was a single couch, her dining room was a table that would seat four if it were pulled away from the wall, her kitchen was a single wall, and her bedroom barely fit her bed, a bureau and a desk. The place had been ransacked but it was clear.

"Clear!" he called to Kono.

She sighed with relief and pushed open the front door.

She gasped.

Everything had been torn apart. She walked around in shock. This was something they saw every day. She had just never thought that it would happen in her own home. Steve gave her crime scene gloves and then watched as she found and picked up little things; a set of carved elephants, her surfing awards, the photos on her bookcase.

Her hand hovered over the photos, as if she was searching for something.

"What's wrong?" Steve asked.

"One's missing."

"What?"

She turned quickly, her eyes frantically scanning the room. "One's missing. Just a random old photo."

Her eyes found the picture in a cracked frame and a pile of broken glass on the other side of the room. It had obviously been thrown with great force across the room. She crossed over to it and tentatively picked it up. She brushed the glass off.

She looked down at it as she spoke. "I don't understand. Why would someone break _this_ picture?"

He walked over behind her and looked at the picture over her shoulder. Kono was riding piggyback on a man with two surfboards in the background. They were both laughing. It seemed like an intimate, candid picture.

"It's personal." She turned to look up at him, questioning what he was implying. "No, I mean, not the picture, the break-in. They are probably someone you know. They were obviously looking for something and probably saw the picture. Must have made them angry for some reason."

"I still don't understand. Why would this make them angry?"

"Well, who is that?" he said pointing to the man.

She looked at him and stuttered. "Umm… it's… it's an old boyfriend of mine."

He watched her and was slightly worried by the way she was uncomfortable with the question. Everyone has skeletons. He wasn't going to judge her for whatever was in her past. Why was she so nervous?

"Okay. Is there anyone from that time who would hold a grudge?"

"Ha!" she laughed abruptly, tracing the picture with her finger. "You don't understand. I was eighteen, on the circuit and in the completely wrong group of friends. James and I were together on and off. We saw people in between, broke up with each other because one of us cheated, but by the next week we would be back together. That made a lot of people angry."

"Why?" he said frankly. He had slept around his whole life. Why would that make other people angry? How was it their business?

She turned and stood in front of him, surprised. "Well, you know, no one would try to hook up with you if you were seeing someone. But as soon as the word got out that James and I had had another shouting match and weren't together and it was really truly final this time, the guys would descend on me and the girls on James and we would both start seeing someone." She paused, looking back down at the picture. "And then James or I would catch a really great wave, maybe win something. The adrenaline was electric. The team would be really happy and everyone would want to congratulate you as you came out of the water. But we were always at the front of the pack for each other. He would grab me and spin me around and I would laugh and he would kiss me and we would be back together. And the other person would be thrown to the side."

He smiled crookedly. "I guess I get how people would be angry."

"Yeah. They finally gave up trying to have a relationship with either of us. Cause they knew we would always end up back together."

"One time it really ended though."

She looked up at him, pain across her face. "Yeah. I blew out my knee right at the end of that season. I was devastated. Really depressed. Had to take meds and everything. They almost put me into a hospital for a while cause they were worried that I was suicidal.

"He was supposed to go home to Australia but instead he skipped the end of the season and came and sat with me in the hospital. He and Chin pulled me back from the edge. After I got out of the hospital, I was trying to redefine myself so I moved out on my own. He lived with me. He had originally said that he would go home once I was fully healed. Once I could surf," she laughed. "But instead he kept putting it off. Worked on getting me back on my board. When I could put on heels, he took me out to dinner. Really fancy, beautiful, romantic." She paused and looked down, obviously struggling.

"He asked you to marry him," Steve said.

She nodded, head down. Finally she brought her face back up with a sniff and he could see slight tears in her eyes. "I loved him but… I was nineteen, he was 21. It was too soon, for both of us. I don't even know if I really believe that he loved me. I mean, can you even know what love is when you're that young?" She was almost crying.

"I don't know."

She nodded, looking away from him. She was trying so hard to hold back the tears.

"Hey," he said.

She turned to look at him and was surprised when he stepped towards her and pulled her into a hug. She quickly relaxed though and rested her head against his chest, her hands on his shoulders.

"I haven't ever really told anyone that," she said when she felt that she could talk without the risk of sobbing. "People were either there or they weren't. They either saw him help me up from the accident or they heard that I had had an accident. He didn't know anyone here, except for my friends. And after he left no one would risk talking to me about him."

"What happened after he asked you?"

"I panicked. He asked me after dinner, on the beach. I turned away from him and started walking. When he caught up to me, I started yelling at him, asking if he really understood what he was asking, telling him that marriage is forever and we had never been good with long term. He just asked if that was a no and I said it was and he left, took the car. I had to call a cab and by the time I was home, he had packed and gone. I found out later that he spent a fortune to get a plane that night. Never talked to him again."

She sighed against his chest and he gently rubbed her back. She loved the way his strong arms felt around her slight body, comforting her. She smiled and moved her head slightly, perfectly molding herself to him so there was no space between. She marveled at how well their bodies fit together.

He rubbed her back for a minute longer and then kissed her on the top of the head. She smiled and turned her head to look up at him.

She realized how close they were.

She stared into his bright blue eyes for a long moment. She suddenly felt many emotions, but the only appropriate one was gratitude.

"Thank you. For everything you've done, you're doing…" She took a breath to collect herself. "Thank you."

He smiled and she could have sworn that her knees wobbled. "No problem," he said. "Honestly, I don't know what I would do if I weren't taking care of you. I would be too worried."

She smiled shyly. "I know how you feel."

They looked at each other for a moment longer and the tension became almost unbearable before he broke the silence and their embrace.

"Well, you should grab what you need so I can start taking care of you already!" he joked. "I'll call HPD to come take a look around here and see what they can get."

She nodded and went into her room as he called HPD. He followed her to stand in the doorway to her room after he made the call. She had grabbed a duffle bag and taken some shirts from her closet. Then she turned to her bureau and grabbed a few pairs of pants. She went to the middle drawer that had her lingerie hanging out of it from where it had been rifled through. She pulled it open and began to throw things into the bag. Steve tried not to watch as she threw in lacy panties and bras, not to mention the bikinis she had already put in. She hadn't seen him come to stand there and probably wouldn't be so carefree if she knew.

Suddenly her hand stilled over the drawer.

"Steve!" she called loudly, as if he was in the other room.

"Yeah," he answered quietly.

She spun quickly, obviously surprised that he was there. "How long have you been standing there?" she asked, perturbed.

"A while."

"How do you sneak up on people like that?"

He laughed, realizing that she was more bothered by the fact that she hadn't heard him than that he had seen her lingerie. "I'll teach you. We have weeks to waste. What were you going to tell me?"

She smoothed out her face to a slightly worried look and turned back to the drawer. "This drawer has a false bottom. I keep personal documents and case files here if I bring them home."

"You bring them home?" he asked. Why had he never noticed that? He made it his business to notice everything.

"Sometimes, if we're stuck." She took a breath. "Like on this trafficking case."

"What are you saying?"

She licked her lip nervously. "I'm saying that someone came here looking for something, but I haven't noticed anything missing." She paused.

"Accept for the file," she said quietly.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

**So I decided that this would need a little more substance than just Steve/Kono time to keep it interesting. The case is about human traffickers and the warehouse they raided (where Kono got shot) was the hub. Obviously, they thought they had squashed the bad guys but they haven't! **

**Also, to all you Battlestar Galactica fans who are completely Grace Park obsessed (or Grace Park fans who are completely BSG obsessed) like myself, there are two references to Boomer and Athena/Helo. I'll let you find them. Send me a review if you do! **

**I love me some reviews!**


	4. Chapter 4

"What are you saying?" he said slowly.

She swallowed. "I think that someone came here to look for information on the case. I can't think of why though. Or who?" she asked.

He turned away, beginning to pace. "Someone who knew you from your last year on the circuit, was jealous of you and James, and knew that you had the case files. They probably wanted the files, knew that it was to hard to break into HQ and saw you take them home."

"You think that someone I knew from surfing was involved in the trafficking case?"

"It's possible. I think that I'll call Danny and Chin and have them come work with the HPD guys." He turned to walk out of her bedroom, dialing Danny. "Pack up the rest of your stuff and head on down to the car. I think you're falling asleep on your feet."

It was true. Her eyes had started to flutter shut and she was leaning against the bureau. She simply nodded and took the bag into the bathroom as he updated Danny. He watched as she walked past him towards the car. Once she was gone, he went around moving everything back to where it had been when they entered.

He then walked out and started to the stairs.

Kono was sitting part way down, her head against the railing.

"Kono!" he called, terror ripping through him. He ran down the steps, stopping to kneel on the step in front of her. He looked up into her down turned face. She had tears running down her cheeks and her hair had fallen forward to shield her face.

He placed his hand on her cheek, raising her face to look at him. Her head was limp in his hand. She wasn't even trying to hold it up. She took a gasping, raspy breath as she tried not to cry.

"I can't do it," she stuttered through her tears. "Steve, I can't do it. I can't move."

"It's okay, it's okay," he said. "I'll carry you down and we'll go home, okay?"

"Okay," she said.

He let her lay back against the railing again. "I'm just going to grab the bag…" He threw the bag over his shoulder and then moved closer to her. He moved her body so that one arm was around his neck and her head was lying against his. Then he slipped one arm around her back and the other under her knees. He lifted her in one smooth motion and began to go to the car.

It was surprisingly easy. For such a strong woman, she was remarkably small and light. What he liked most though, was how toned she was. She was the type of person that people avoid in the gym. And she was tall. He liked tall women.

Not that he thought of her that way.

They reached the truck and he used the hand under her knees to open the door. She didn't seem to notice and he gently set her in the passenger seat. When he pulled away enough to look at her face, he realized that she had fallen asleep. She was completely dead to the world in barely a minute.

He smiled down at her. She was beautiful. No, she was gorgeous. Her face twitched as she slept and he tried not to laugh. He pulled the seat belt across her, gently buckling it. Then he shut the door quietly and went around to his side. He slipped the duffle in between the seats and then shut the door again, leaning back against it.

A minute later Danny and Chin appeared, followed by a HPD squad car. Steve stood to meet them. He told them what they had found and what they thought so far. Danny went up to start bagging and tagging with the HPD guys. Steve and Chin stayed to talk by the cars.

"She told you about James?" Chin asked.

"Yeah."

"Jeez, she hasn't ever talked about it, not with anyone. Only a little with me. And that's not to say I didn't try, brah."

"Well it was relevant."

"Yeah I guess," Chin allowed. "How she doing?"

"She's exhausted. Couldn't make it down the stairs and fell asleep when I carried her down. She's sleeping now. I'm going to take her home and put her in a real bed, let her sleep for a while."

"Good idea." Chin went over to look in the window at his baby cousin. He laughed slightly.

"What?" Steve asked.

"No matter how old she gets, when I see her sleeping, she still looks like my little cousin. Something innocent about her face when she's sleeping."

Steve smiled. "I know what you mean. Same thing with Mary."

Chin smiled, then turned serious. "I'm glad she's staying with you. If anyone can take care of her, it's you."

"But?" Steve said.

"But if you make a move on her, I will come down on you like a ton of bricks."

"I kind of guessed that all ready."

Chin laughed. "Yeah, I guess so. I just am still kind of protective of her."

"I was that way with Mer. Before we shipped back to the main land. She was only in junior high, but the way those guys looked at her…" He shook his head. "When we were getting on different planes, I told her to take care of herself and be smart. I don't think she understood what I was saying at the time."

"But you tried."

"Yep. Don't think it worked."

"If there was something between you and Kono - "

"There isn't," Steve said.

"Yeah, but if there was. If she wanted it, she would tell me to leave you guys alone. But if you ever hurt her I would come after you. Got it?"

"Chin there's nothing between us." Chin glared at him. "Got it."

"Okay. Now get her home. She deserves to sleep in a real bed for a while."

"Yep. See ya, brah." He got in the car as Chin went up to the apartment.

As Steve turned on the engine and went down the driveway to the main road, he glanced over at Kono. Her face really was innocent as she slept. It was sweet and gentle. It didn't show any evidence of the tough as nails woman she was when she was awake. He liked to see her so calm and relaxed for once.

And he realized that he hadn't said he wasn't going to make a move.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks a million to everyone who has been reviewing, especially Vic and Froggie2! I **_**really**_** appreciate it! Sorry it has taken so long for me to update again. We were cleaning our house after renovations and then we took a trip and then school started and you can kinda see how I haven't had time to post. Plus I had some serious writer's block. **

**Also, no one answered my BSG shout out. Not sure if that's because no one watches it or because no one found them. Well, I also recently pulled out my DVDs of The Border, another show Grace Park was on (and amazing in. I highly recommend this show). So there will be references to that too. I like using stuff I've seen her do before because I can make it really believable. **

**SO. On with the show. And it's a long-ish one to reward you for waiting!**

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve gently stopped the car and killed the engine. He got out and went around to Kono's side to pick her up. She stirred slightly as he slid his hands under her, but he whispered gently in her ear and she quickly fell back asleep against him.

He carried her into the house and up the stairs. He peeked into the guest room, realizing too late that he needed to make the bed in there before she could use it. So he went to the next room, Mary's, and peeked in there. It was a mess, with the bed completely destroyed.

He sighed. That only left his room as sleep-ready. He walked to the end of the hall, gently pushed open the door and laid her down on the clean side of the bed. This was the nice part of having a California king: one half was more than enough room for one.

He slipped her flip-flops off and paused to consider for a moment. Finally he decided that her comfort was worth more than the awkward moment it would cause later. He gently, barely touching her, unzipped and unbuttoned her jeans before he slid them carefully down her long legs. He realized that he didn't need to worry so much; Kono was dead to the world. So he couldn't stop himself from looking down at her smooth, tan legs that seemed to go on forever.

Silently, he picked up the discarded clothing that lay around the room. He had learned early on in his dating career that seeing a guy's dirty boxers from last week really didn't turn women on.

_WOW. I did not just think that in relation to Kono, did I?_

_No, of course not_, he quickly amended. He was just trying to make sure she was comfortable and it wasn't awkward to be sleeping in his room. Of course. That was all.

But when he turned to look back at her sleeping in his bed before he left the room, he couldn't help but notice how good her tan skin and black hair looked against the light cream of his sheets.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve went out to the car and carried Kono's bag up to his room, placing on her side of the bed. He liked the way that sounded. Herside.

It wasn't even noon yet and Steve went downstairs to call Danny.

"Hey Steve. How's our girl?"

"She's fine Danny. I took her upstairs and she's sleeping, for now. What are you guys finding at her apartment?"

"Well, so far we have a whole lot of fingerprints. For having such a small place, she apparently has a lot of people over."

"You realize it's highly unlikely that they didn't wear gloves?"

"Yes, Steven I know that. But it doesn't hurt to check."

"True. Anything else?"

"The lock was definitely picked –"

"Did you think they had keys?"

"Steven –"

"Sorry, sorry… you were saying?"

"The lock was definitely picked and it seems like they focused most of their search to drawers. I think that whoever did this definitely knew Kono. Could you ask Kono about that when she wakes up?"

"Yeah, of course. I don't want to upset her though. She's obviously still really affected by the concussion."

"Yeah, I get it. Call us if anything comes up."

"You'll do the same, right?"

"Yeah, yeah. Take care of her."

"I will." He snapped the phone shut.

On the other end of the line, in Kono's apartment, Danny pulled his phone from his ear and looked at it.

"Why does he do that?" he asked somewhat angrily.

"What, hang up suddenly?" Chin asked, watching as the one of the HPD guys took a picture of the fingerprints off the coffee table.

"Yeah. I mean, is he incapable of saying good bye?"

"No, he just doesn't see the point. You know, the only time I ever heard his father say good bye over the phone was when he was talking to his wife. The whole 'I love you too. See you later,' kind of spiel."

"So you're saying that it's genetic and we can't train him?"

"I doubt it. But if you want to try…"

"No I think I'll pass." He looked around. "Think we're about done here?"

Everything inch of the apartment had been photographed, dusted for fingerprints and everything that appeared halfway relevant had been bagged and tagged.

"Yeah, I think so, brah," Chin answered. "Let's get to the office and start running the fingerprints."

"Sounds good."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve went upstairs after thinking about the call with Danny for a while. He went into the bathroom to shower, realizing that he hadn't done so since sometime yesterday morning. He turned the water on and slipped out of his clothes. He stood, just letting the hot water wash some of the stress and tension off of him. Once he felt clean and slightly more relaxed, he turned the water and dried himself off.

That was when he realized that he hadn't brought any clothes in with him.

Carefully, he stuck his head out the bathroom door. He hadn't heard her get up, but with the water on, he really couldn't be sure. Seeing no movement, he made sure the towel was tied securely around his waist and held it with his hand just to be sure as he made his way over to his bedroom door. He pushed it open slightly, checking to see that she was still asleep.

She was lying in exactly the position he had left her.

So far, so good.

He tiptoed into the room and over to his bureau. He opened the bottom drawer as gently as possible, resulting in only minimal scraping. He grabbed a pair of cargo pants out and set them on top of the bureau before carefully sliding that drawer shut again. He went to the next drawer, exercising equal care with this one and placing the t-shirt on top of the pants on the top of the bureau. Only one drawer left and then escaping back to the bathroom and everything would be fine.

If only he had bought a new bureau instead of adopting his parents old one.

He forgot that the top drawer squeaked. The adrenaline made him careless and he pulled it a little to hard, a little too far. He cringed as it released a loud squeak.

"Mmmm…" came a moan from behind him.

He grabbed the pair of underwear, threw it on top of the shirt and slid the drawer shut quickly with his hip as he gathered the clothes to his chest. He quickly rushed out of the room, not looking back to see if she had actually woken up.

He released two long breaths, letting the towel drop as he sunk back against the bathroom door in relief.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

About an hour later, Steve was sitting downstairs in the living room looking over the evidence that Danny had sent him. It seemed that he had been right about the fingerprints as none came up with anything other than a few friends of Kono's who had been arrested for underage drinking ten years ago. Come to think of it, Kono had probably been arrested for that with them. Something she had once said about night surfing and underage drinking.

He heard footsteps on the stairs and looked up to see a groggy Kono wearing her shirt from earlier and a pair of running shorts with paint splatters on them. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail and her light makeup was slightly smudged.

"Hey," she moaned in his general direction.

"Hey. How ya feeling?"

"Okay I guess. I woke up without pants though and I'm pretty sure I went to sleep in them."

"Yeah but I thought you'd be more comfortable without them."

She smiled. "Thanks. Also did you walk in a little while ago looking like you just got out of the shower or was that my jumbled mind playing tricks on me?"

He was pretty sure he blushed. "No I did. I forgot to grab clothes before I went in."

"And that begs the question of why was I sleeping in your room?"

"The guest bed wasn't made up yet and Mary's room looks like a tornado hit it. I made the bed in the guest room though, so don't worry."

"Okay. Nice sheets by the way."

He looked at her. "You hungry?" he asked finally, getting up. He looked at clock, seeing that it was almost one o'clock.

"Yeah, definitely," Kono answered moving to sit at the bar. Steve followed her and glanced at the doctor's instructions, which he had dropped on the counter.

"You know, I should probably change the wrapping on your shoulder. We're supposed to do it every six hours for a few days until it stops leaking."

"Okay. How does this work?"

"Take your shirt off, first." He opened the bag of stuff the doctor had given him that was also on the counter. He pulled out the bandages, the gentle antiseptic and the gauze pads.

He was completely oblivious to the way she looked at him with slight apprehension before starting to pull her shirt off. She had felt uncomfortable at the hospital even though he had seen her in a bikini a million times. And now he was _asking_ her to take her shirt off? Suggestive or purely professional?

The lines of normalcy that she had set up in her mind were starting to blur.

She couldn't tell anymore. Steve was so sweet to her. He always had been. Was this different or just him adapting to the situation? She was sure that she could of stayed with Chin but instead Steve had volunteered to do this. Did he want to be close to her or was he just trying to take care of a teammate? She was reading too much into the situation and she knew it.

And _why _did it feel like her head was battling her heart and wanting him to be trying to get closer?

He didn't seem to notice her conflicting feelings and confused mind as he came around the bar to where she was know sitting in only her bra and an old pair of running shorts. He looked up from the things he was laying out on the bar to look at her. Or she thought he was, but really he was staring at her shoulder. She watched his eyes narrow and fidgeted under his gaze. He looked up when he saw her moving.

"Sorry, it's just… your bra strap is over the bandage."

"Oh-kay…"

"Well, I was wondering…"

"Just spit it out," Kono said as Steve hesitated.

"Fine. If you used your other arm to hold your bra in place, I could unhook it and slide that strap off to change the bandage without trying to work around it."

She stared at him. She swallowed.

"Kono, I'm not going to take advantage of the fact that you were injured on my watch. I'm just trying to help you."

Her eyes softened and she smiled at him. "I know, Steve."

She reached her arm up and held her bra in place, turning her back towards him. He quickly undid her bra and helped her slide her arm out. She sat there, feeling vulnerable.

But as his hands worked quickly, touching her oh so gently, she knew that he could tell how she was feeling. She only flinched a few times as he cleaned the stitches and worked as quickly as he could without making mistakes. When he finished, he slid the strap back up her arm and re-did the hook. Suddenly he leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on the edge of her shoulder.

She looked over at him, surprised.

"Sorry," he said as he grabbed her shirt off the counter and she turned toward him.

She hesitated. "It's okay."

He fidgeted with her shirt, looking down at his hands, before he looked up at her. "I just never want you to think that I would hurt you or take advantage of you. I love you and the only thing I ever want to do is help and support you."

She smiled and brought her good hand up to touch his cheek. "I know Steve. I trust you."

He smiled back, feeling much better. He helped her put the shirt back on, before pulling her into a hug and holding her tight to him. He whispered in her ear.

"I promised I'd always protect you. Not only did I fail in that yesterday, but I almost lost you, Kono. I'm never going to let go of you again."

She closed her eyes and smiled. She had never felt so loved.


	6. Chapter 6

"What I still don't get is the motive?" Danny asked, leaning over his plate.

Danny and Chin had showed up just as Steve and Kono had been making lunch. They had shared the new information on the case and the break-in and then they started sharing ideas while they ate lunch on the lanai.

So far all they knew was that someone who knew Kono had broken into her place to find the case file on the human traffickers. Which meant that there must be a boss that they didn't know about. And that whoever broke into Kono's place was working for him. Maybe.

Really they had no idea.

They all looked at each other as Danny spoke.

"I mean, we know that this… person wanted the case file, but why break into Kono's apartment?"

Steve spoke up. "Maybe they were staking out the office, trying to find a way to get in and steal the file. But they saw Kono leave with a file and decided to break into her place in the hope that it was the one they wanted. Kono, what day did you take the file home?"

"Sorry, what?" Kono asked belatedly.

He looked at her more closely and realized that she was falling asleep again. It worried him lightly that she was so affected by the concussion. He asked the question again.

"Uh, I think it was a few days ago. Maybe three days, Monday?"

Steve looked across the table at Danny and Chin. "That's before the takedown."

The tension floating around the table was palpable, although Kono was so exhausted, it went completely over her head.

"They have an informant," Danny finished.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Danny and Chin left pretty fast once they realized that Kono was barely hanging on. They promised to keep everyone in the McGarrett residence up to date and disappeared.

Steve told Kono to rest, so she went over to the hammock and quickly collapsed into it. He took all the dishes into the kitchen and cleaned up after their lunch. When he finished, he went out to check on Kono.

She was sleeping, one knee bent, the foot tucked under her other knee. One arm was across her stomach, the other bent up towards her face, her head tilted to where her nose almost touched her fingers. Her lips were relaxed, a slight smile on them.

She was beautiful.

He had never tried to deny that. He had always recognized that she was shockingly gorgeous. It had never been quite so evident to him before though. Her peaceful face was the epitome of beauty for him.

He wondered what it would be like to wake up and see that face first thing in the morning.

No he didn't.

He most certainly did not.

It was just a hypothetical. What would it be like to wake up and see a face _that beautiful_ every morning?

Finally he just shook his head and pushed the thought to the back of his mind. He walked away and went back inside to do some more brainstorming about the case.

Before he could even sit down at the kitchen bar though, he heard a key in the front door.

No. That was impossible. The only other person with a key was…

Mary Ann.

There she was, standing there with a huge suitcase and carry-on bag.

She looked up. "Hey Steve," she said, completely calm to his surprise.

He stared.

"Sorry, I probably should have called you. It's just I kinda didn't mean to come and only thought of that when the cab pulled up here."

He snapped out of his surprise. "Mer, what are you doing here? I mean, it's great, I love to see you, but…"

"I know, I know. It's just I really wanted to get away from LA for a while. I had about a week of vacation sitting around so I just kinda told my boss I was taking it now and bought a plane ticket and here I am."

"Okay." Steve looked back toward the lanai. "Uh, so you know, Kono was shot and she's staying here, so I can look after her. She has a pretty bad concussion."

"Oh my God!" Mary said. "Oh, geez, okay, I'll try to be quiet and help and stuff. Also I'll probably be out a lot, so hopefully I won't bother you guys."

"What do you mean?" What was she talking about? 'Bother you guys'?

"I mean, I don't want to disturb her."

"Why did you say 'you guys' then?"

"I don't know," she said. "Why? Are you two…"

"No! We're not. I don't know why everyone keeps suggesting that!"

"Maybe because you're both very beautiful people and you work together and kick ass together and are very alike?" He glared at her. "I don't know just throwing some stuff out there! Don't look at me like that!"

Steve frowned. "I guess so. I mean it's not like we've ever given them reason to."

"Okay, whatever. I'm gonna go throw my stuff upstairs."

He watched as she disappeared up the stairs with her suitcase.

This could be interesting.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

**I know it's a short one. But I felt like I had to update sooner rather than later. I promise the next one will come sooner and be longer! **

**Reviews keep me motivated! Also, if anyone has cool ideas, I'm open to input! (there's some writers block going on over here) **


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry, y'all! I know it's been a while and this is short one. For that, I'm sorry. Life and school are hectic. **

**Thank you Diana for your undying love, patience, and good advice. You are the queen of on time updating and I am so… not. Anyway, thanks so much. Love all the reviews! **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He was right. Surprise, surprise. Mary was so predictable it was almost funny. After she had gone upstairs, he had gone out on the lanai to look over the case files. His excuse was that it was a nice day and he wanted to keep an eye on Kono. In reality, he was more watching Kono sleep than he was thinking about the case.

Mary had opened the windows in her bedroom to air it out (like she always did) and he heard her call her friends. He heard her laughing and wasn't surprised when she came downstairs and found him. She was wearing a cover up over a bikini and carrying a beach bag.

"I'm going to the beach with some friends and we'll probably go clubbing tonight. Then we'll do brunch and more beach stuff or maybe shopping tomorrow. Like I said, I probably won't be around that much." She spoke quietly so as not to disturb Kono.

"Sounds good. We'll be here," Steve answered.

Mary looked over at Kono, taking in the bandages on her chest with surprising tranquility. "How is she doing?" she asked Steve.

"Okay. The gunshot wound is healing up well and her reaction to the concussion is expected. It's weird to see her so out of it, though."

"Yeah I bet," Mary said, looking down at him. She squeezed his shoulder. "Take care of her. I'll be back eventually and will try not to be too loud."

"Thanks, Mer."

"No problem. See ya later." He nodded and she went to leave.

As she stepped inside the house, she turned to look back. Steve had sat forward in the Adirondack chair and was sitting with his elbows on his knees, hands clasped before him. He was staring intently, with obvious worry and affection, at Kono.

She started to wonder if maybe everyone's wondering about their feelings were so inaccurate after all.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He had to admit that he was actually just watching Kono. Really, he had set aside the papers and was just staring at her. Maybe it was because there was something very comforting about the steady rise and fall of her chest. Maybe it was something else.

His mind flitted through all the strange moments since she was shot where he was pretty sure he had thought of her as something far more important than a colleague.

Ok, so yeah, maybe, just maybe, there was something there. Maybe that was why people seemed to be picking up on the idea of a relationship between the two of them.

Well, actually he wasn't sure about that. A relationship? Apart from the fact that he was pretty sure both of them sucked at relationships (although probably mostly him), it would be totally unprofessional of them. And he was always a professional.

_Yeah._ _Right._

He sat up. That little Danny voice in the back of his head was way too realistic. The sarcasm dripping, the typical grumbling about Steve's "professional tactics". Too weird.

He shook his head needing to get this train of thought to go away.

He was surprised by a quiet moan coming from the hammock. He silently grabbed the case file and pretended to be reading it when she turned to look at him.

"Hey," she moaned quietly, still half asleep.

Why did it sound so inappropriate to him? "Hey," said back quietly. "Feel better?"

"Yeah, actually."

"Do you need anything?"

"No, I'll get up and get it myself."

He stood, walking over to push her back into the hammock. "No, you stay here. What do you need?"

She smiled and laid back. "A glass of water and the book I threw in my bag."

He smiled at her, rubbing her shoulder lightly and unconsciously playing with her hair. "Back in a second," he said before turning away to go in the house.

She sighed contentedly. Who knew that Steve could be like this? So kind, so caring. It was nice. She wished that she could see this side more often. All the time in fact. And preferably aimed to her.

Not some other girl.

Oh, had she actually thought that? She usually stopped those things before they got there. It was becoming increasingly challenging though. Everywhere she turned he seemed to pop up, doing something that brought up those thoughts, those feelings.

She let her eyes slip closed and focused on the light breeze and the sound of the ocean. It was her favorite thing in the world and she let all her cares and worries slip out.

She heard him step out onto the lanai again and resisted the urge to smile. He walked towards her and then paused.

She opened one eye slightly to look at him. "I'm awake, you know."

He smiled. "Sorry. Thought you might have fell asleep again. Didn't want to disturb you."

"Oh… so you weren't checking me out?" she teased.

Where had that come from? _Kono! _she thought to herself. _Think before you speak!_

He stiffened and twitched as he set down her water and the book on the little table next to her.

"Uhh… what?"

"Sorry… I'm just teasing you," she attempted to joke.

It fell flat.

He looked at her warily. Sure, his gaze said.

Now the question was, where did they go from here?


	8. Chapter 8

Steve sat back down and watched as Kono grabbed her book and flipped it open, searching for her page. She found it and laid the book on her stomach, reaching out for the water.

"So there's been an interesting development," Steve said as she took a drink.

She swallowed quickly. "In the case?"

"No, in the house."

She tipped her head, raising her eyebrow. _Cute_, he thought. Her question was obvious, even though she couldn't say it around the second mouthful of water.

"Mary Ann is here. Showed up after you fell asleep. Apparently she had vacation time and needed a break. She forgot to call though."

"Oh," Kono said. Did he catch a hint of disappointment in her voice?

"But she probably won't be around much," he added.

Suddenly her face lit up. "Well it's great that she's here!"

He raised his eyebrows in a silent question.

"I really need a shower."

He laughed. "Yeah I can see how she could be better at helping with that."

They smiled at each other.

"She's out with friends right now. The doctor said you could take a shower tomorrow, so maybe she could help you in the morning. I'll text her to not get too drunk," he said as he pulled out his phone.

"Ok," Kono answered, giving him one last look before settling in with her book.

After he sent the text to Mary, he pulled the file back over. He used it as a cover for watching Kono's face as she read. It was very expressive and he found himself smiling with her.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve and Kono made a simple dinner together before Kono turned on the TV to a reality show she liked. Steve sat with her on the couch but was on his computer looking at the small amount of new case things Danny had sent over.

If they were being honest with themselves, the case was getting nowhere. Danny had found a car sitting outside the office on the security system but it was a rental under a false name and the tracking system had been disabled. He sent Steve the video from the office.

It showed a grey Prius sitting outside the office, possibly casing it, for a few hours. Then Kono walked out with the file and went to her car. The Prius followed her. Danny said that he had followed Kono and the Prius back to her apartment through traffic cameras. It disappeared outside her apartment.

They were also getting nowhere with the informant lead. Chin was looking into everyone who could have possibly had access to the files, but that was a few hundred people at the HPD and in the governor's office. He hadn't found anything yet and it was going to take time.

Steve looked through the file one last time and then closed it, sliding it onto the coffee table. The movement prompted a small mumble from the couch next to him. He turned to look at Kono.

She had curled her feet under her on the side not facing him and rested her head against the back of the couch next to him. She twisted and began to wake up.

Steve quickly turned the TV off and turned to Kono.

"Come on, sweetheart, time for bed," he whispered.

"Uhhh..."

"Ok, hon, come on." He touched her shoulder, gently shaking her.

"No…"

He sighed. "Come on Kono," he said, sliding an arm under her legs to put her feet on the floor. She whimpered and tried to curl back into the couch.

He found himself laughing. She was just too cute. He slid her right arm over his shoulders and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her up. She was sort of awake now and he helped keep her upright as they walked to the top of the stairs. He took her into the guest bedroom and pointed her towards the bed and the duffle. She ended up just collapsing on the end of the bed and trying to pull off her shorts. Eventually she just groaned and fell back.

"You want help?" he asked, smirking from the doorway.

"Sure," came the exhausted reply.

He walked over and slid his hands under the edge of her shorts.

She gasped involuntarily.

He paused.

"Sorry," she mumbled. "Your hands are cold." _Total lie_, she thought.

"Oh sorry," he said. He quickly pulled off the shorts. "Sit up and I'll help you with your shirt."

She lay there.

"Kono?"

"Uhh…"

"Sit up."

A pause. Then, "Not sure I can."

He laughed and sat next to her so he could reach around her and pull her upright. She was like a limp noodle in his arms. He stood in front of her and supported her as he carefully pulled her t-shirt off. He had her prop herself up with one arm while he went and looked for a sleep shirt. He came back with an old, obviously well loved t-shirt that he thought would work.

He stopped in front of her, realizing for the first time that she was sitting there in only her underwear.

How was this going to work?

He realized that she was so tired, she was basically unconscious. He went over and slipped the t-shirt over her head. He then leaned over her shoulder and undid her bra, keeping his eyes on the wall behind her as he slid it down her arms.

But she wasn't unconscious. She vaguely realized that his body was very close to her and he was taking off her bra. That, combined with his scent, nearly drove her over the edge. It would have been so easy to just pull him down onto the bed and have her way with him.

Except that she was about to pass out.

So she didn't do anything when he slid the bra straps down her arms or when he pulled her arms gently into the t-shirt. She didn't do anything when he pulled her to her feet and guided her to the top of the bed, where he pushed back the blankets and helped her under. She didn't do anything when he pulled the blankets up to her chest. And she blanked out when he moved away to pick up her clothes and put them on her duffle.

When he looked back at her before going to his own room, she was asleep.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Sometime in the middle of the night, Steve was awakened by his cell phone ringing on the bedside table. He blindly reached for it.

"Hello?"

"Hi," said a man's voice that he didn't recognize. "Do you know a Mary Ann McGarrett?"

And then he was awake. "Yeah, she's my sister. What's going on? Is she okay?"

"That's what I thought. Yeah she's fine. I'm the bartender at Boom, a club in Waikiki. Her friends left a while ago to go to a different club, but she was chatting with some guy and said she would catch up later. The guy left and she just asked me for shots. I prefer to stop the ones who are trying to drown their feelings in alcohol. Could you come get her before I actually have to give her the shots?"

"Yeah, course. I'll be there in ten minutes. How'd you get her phone?"

"Told her I wanted to put my number in so we could go out sometime."

"Smart. Thank you."

"No problem man. I'll tell the bouncer to expect you."

Steve thanked him and hung up before going to put on his clothes from the day before. He quickly walked to Kono's room, shaking her shoulder lightly until she woke up a little.

"I have to go get Mary. I'll be back in a half hour, okay?"

"'Kay," she mumbled back, sinking back into the pillows.

He doubted that she had actually heard him, but it would have to do.

He ran down stairs and jumped in his truck. He knew where Boom was and drove there quickly. He walked up to the bouncer and told him who he was. The bouncer immediately let him in.

Inside, Mary was sitting at the bar, tapping her foot against the rungs on the stool. The bartender was down the bar and looked up as he walked in, nodding to him. Steve nodded back and went over to Mary.

"Hey, Mer."

She spun to look at him. "Steve, what are you doing here?"

She seemed only slightly drunk. That was good. "The bartender here thought you'd had enough for tonight."

She snorted. "I've only had a few beers. I was just about to get shots and get really wrecked though."

"Cause some guy left you here?"

She looked sharply at him. "Leave me alone."

"Mary, I need you to help Kono tomorrow. Let's just go home."

She softened at the reminder of Kono. "Okay, fine. But only because of Kono."

He nodded. "Next time, I'll let you get smashed, if you promise me you'll call if you need a ride home."

She rolled her eyes but promised. She stumbled a little as the alcohol went to her head. He caught her and led her outside to his truck. They got home and she went upstairs, shutting her door behind her. He heard her take off her shoes and hopefully her clothes before going to bed.

He went down the hall to Kono's room. She laid spread eagled across the bed. He smiled. She had knocked some of the covers off and it was pretty obvious that she slept hot.

He walked over and shook her shoulder. "I'm back, Kono."

"Umm…" she mumbled vaguely and he took that as recognition.

He went down the hall and back to bed, smiling as he thought of his two girls.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He woke up later than normal the next morning, even though it was only 5:30. He left a note on the counter and went for a short swim. A half hour later he was back and no one was up still so he went to take a shower.

A little after eight, Kono appeared at the top of the stairs. She had managed to pull the shorts on again, but she obviously hadn't bothered with a bra.

He tried not to stare.

She rubbed her eyes and yawned.

"Coffee?" he asked.

"Uhh, yeah, that sounds good."

He smiled and went to pour her a cup of coffee. "Milk, sugar?"

"Black is fine."

"My kind of girl," he said, smiling at her.

She tipped her head in question.

"Low-maintenance. Kind of backcountry. You like your steaks rare, don't you?"

"I do."

"See?"

"I guess so."

"So what do you want for breakfast?"

"Whatcha got?"

"Uhh, eggs, pancakes, waffles… what ever you want."

"Hmm… what will Mary want?"

"Pancakes," he answered without hesitation. "And an egg white omelet with salsa."

"Sounds good to me. But not egg whites, just normal eggs."

"Also low-maintenance. Thank you!"

She laughed at how happy he seemed to not have to deal with weird requests. She sat at the bar and watched as he made the pancake batter and began to put them in the skillet.

"Do I smell pancakes?" came a voice from the top of the stairs.

Kono and Steve looked over when Mary appeared. She looked like hell but her eyes were alight with excitement.

They laughed.

"What?" she asked. "Steve uses the recipe our mom had. They're amazing!"

Kono spoke first. "He predicted that that's what you would want. Along with an egg white omelet with salsa."

Her face lit up even more. "Really? Will you make that Steve? He never wants to make it," she said to Kono, who laughed more.

Steve managed to stop laughing. "Yes, Mer, I will make your complicated omelet. And Kono and I will have regular ones."

Mary sighed. "No wonder you two get along so well. You're both very low-maintenance."

This of course set of another round of laughs.

After breakfast, Mary and Kono went upstairs to help Kono shower. They took a box of saran wrap and a roll of tape to protect it her wound from the water. Steve stayed down stairs, doing the dishes.

Up in the bathroom, Mary was helping Kono undress and then cover the wound. Obviously, it was rather personal and they began talking.

Of course, Mary had an agenda.

She had thought of it yesterday, when Steve texted her. The perfect opportunity. Alone, trapped, no chance that Steve would pop in.

"So what did you guys do yesterday?"

"We hung out on the lanai and then made dinner and watched TV. I think I fell asleep. Everything is pretty fuzzy after a while. I think he got me up to bed. I should probably apologize."

They were getting her into the shower now and Mary sat on the toilet in case she needed anything.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"I can be kind of a nightmare when I'm tired."

"I doubt he minded."

"Yeah, still. I know he helped me up and got me into bed."

Mary laughed quietly.

"Eww! Mary! Stop it, you know that's not what I meant!"

"I'm sorry! You said it, I just laughed!"

"Uhh, shut up!"

"You wouldn't have said it if you weren't thinking about it!" Mary teased. _Let the plan begin_, she thought.

Kono stuck her head around the side of the shower curtain. "Don't even go there, Mer! Would you do my hair?"

Mary stood up and took the shampoo bottle Kono offered. "Come on, even I know that he's an attractive guy. Don't tell me you didn't feel anything!"

Kono was silent. "You're not trying to set us up are you?"

Mary laughed. "Oh God no! Things will take care of themselves. I just want to know."

"So you're not like… going to go… tell him… or anything?" she said haltingly.

She was nervous. _Oh, yes! She does like him_. "No, of course not. Whatever is meant to happen will happen without me meddling." And she meant it.

Kono could tell that she was telling the truth. So she opened up. "Well, yeah, of course I felt something. I was so deliriously tired I actually considered jumping him. But of course, I was deliriously tired and totally incapable of doing that."

Mary grinned.

"But seriously, he's my boss! I can't… We can't… It's just not okay, Mary." She stepped back inside the shower to rinse out the shampoo, reappearing a minute later with the conditioner.

"Why not?" Mary asked. _She just admitted to being attracted to him. Why not be together? _

"Because I already have to work to prove myself. I'm already thought of as the girl, the fragile one. I can't have an affair with my boss, it would make people think that's how I keep my job!" She stepped back inside the shower.

"Who said anything about an affair?"

"What?" Kono asked, standing up straight in the privacy of the shower.

"You said affair. I was thinking relationship." Mary bit her lip, hoping.

Kono was silent. _Relationship. With Steve. How good that sounds!_ she thought. _Absolutely impossible, _her rational side said. _He's your boss. You can't feel that way about him. And he definitely doesn't feel that way about you! _

"Mary, he's my boss. I can't even consider that. I can't even recognize those feelings. And he definitely doesn't feel that way about me."

Mary laughed. She actually laughed. "Oh, Kono, you don't think he has feelings for you?"

"Of course he doesn't! He can't!"

Kono had stepped out of the shower, a towel in her hands. Mary helped her dry her hair and limbs.

"But Kono, he does! I have never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you!"

Kono spun toward her.

"No Mary. He can't. He doesn't. I have to believe that."

And she was so emphatic that Mary actually believed her. She actually saw fear in Kono's eyes at the idea of knowing that Steve liked her back. Mary couldn't understand it, but she had to accept it.

She nodded.

Kono wrapped the towel around herself and they went to her bedroom. Mary helped her into her underwear, some jean shorts and her bra. Then she pulled out a t-shirt.

"Uhhh…" Kono moaned. "I have no idea what possessed me to pack those! It's so hard to get them on and off! Except I don't own any button ups, so they're really the only choice."

"I have some button-ups, but they might be kind of tight. You could wear one of Steve's dress shirts?"

Kono looked at her.

"Or is that awkward?"

"Let's try yours."

Mary was right. They were too small. Kono was much taller and had broader shoulders than Mary.

Kono sighed. "Fine, let's try Steve's."

Mary disappeared down the hall as Kono sat on the bed, head on her good hand, trying to process what Mary had said. Or maybe _not_ process, simply block out.

Mary returned with a few shirts of Steve's. Kono chose a light blue one and slipped it on. It was huge on her but when she tucked it into her jean shorts and rolled up the sleeves, it fit all right. And it would be much easier to get on and off.

If she let herself, she would almost say it looked good.

Hot, in that morning-after way.

God, she hoped he didn't see it that way.

They went down stairs and Steve turned to look at them. He did a double take.

"Is that my shirt?"

"Yeah," Kono said smoothly. "Button-ups are easier to get on and off and Mary's were too small so I stole a few of yours."

He looked at her for a second and then shrugged. "Okay. Not like I wear dress shirts very often. We should re-bandage your shoulder."

"Sure."

They sat down at the bar with the first aid kit. Kono was able to undo and remove one sleeve by herself. Obviously, the button-up shirt was a good idea. Steve helped her take off the bra strap and then set to working on the bandage.

Mary was sitting in the living room behind Steve.

She was grinning.

Kono glared at her.

"I'm going to go clean up and then go out with friends," Mary said, grinning even wider at Kono. "I already skipped brunch with them, so I should get there soon."

"Okay Mer. Call if you'll be here for dinner," Steve said without looking up from Kono's shoulder.

"Will do," Mary answered, still grinning. "But I doubt it."

"Okay," Steve said.

Kono glared at her. She knew what Mary was trying to do. She was trying to give them "alone time".

_God, I hate you Mary! _

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Mary was right. She didn't return until late that evening. Steve and Kono spent the day relaxing. There was no progress on the case, so they didn't really do any work. Chin stopped by that evening with a big box full of everything relating to surfing that he and Kono owned. He had the idea that she could go through and make a list of possible suspects from the pictures. But that could wait until tomorrow.

Today, they just enjoyed the sun and each other's company.

The next day, Steve made breakfast. While they were eating, he got a call from Danny. They had gotten a hit on the Prius and he and Chin were going to check it out. Steve wanted to get out of the house and let Kono be without him for a while, so he said he would go into the office to keep going over the possible informants while they dealt with the Prius. It would probably only be a couple of hours and Mary said that she would hang out with Kono while he was gone.

At home, Kono was bored of reading and watching TV, so she pulled out the box of surf things. Mary was in the living room watching some TV show she liked. Kono let herself float from memory to memory as she went through the box, separating them by year and then making a list of all the people that had known her while she and James were together.

Mary heard a knock on the front door and got up to get it. The TV was on loud enough and Kono was occupied enough that she didn't even hear it.

A man stood on the other side of the door, wearing a V-neck t-shirt and board shorts.

"Hi," he said. "Is this the McGarrett household?"

"Yes. Who are you?" Mary asked. Kono could only hear muffled voices and wasn't really paying attention anyways.

"I'm a friend of Kono's. I heard she was staying here and I came to see if she's alright."

"Come on in," Mary said turning to lead him into the house.

Pain. A microsecond of pain at the back of her head and then…

Nothing.


	9. Chapter 9

"_Come on in," Mary said turning to lead him into the house. _

_Pain. A microsecond of pain at the back of her head and then…_

_Nothing. _

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

The man caught Mary as she fell forward, cushioning her fall so Kono wouldn't hear. He picked her up and took her keys off the table by the door. He carried her out to her rental car and unlocked it, placing her inside the trunk and then relocking it. Then he returned to the house.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve was bored. Danny and Chin had briefed him and then left to follow the lead on the Prius. He was now sitting at the smart table going through all the possible people who had access to the file. Chin hadn't been lying; it was a long list. He found himself looking at the clock constantly and wondering what Kono was doing, if she was okay…

If she missed him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono hadn't heard Mary in a little while. "Mary?" she called.

No answer.

Maybe she had stepped outside for a moment to talk to the person?

Kono straightened her work so she would know where she had stopped and began to get up.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He silently closed the front door, hearing Kono call out to Mary from the dining room on the other side of the wall. He heard her shuffling and then her chair scraping back. He knew she would appear before him in a moment.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono pushed her chair back with her right arm, keeping the hurt one bent in front of her chest like she was supposed to. She stretched a little, noticing a kink in her neck for the first time. Then she moved around the table to go to the front door.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He couldn't wait for the moment he would see her. He wanted to see her face. He wanted her to run into his arms like he had dreamed so many times. He knew that they were very different people now but he still loved her. He didn't care what she thought. He knew what he thought.

He knew what he wanted.

To see her.

To hold her.

To touch her.

To kiss her.

To make love to her.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

In general, Kono considered herself to be pretty well prepared. Few things took her by surprise.

For once, she was truly surprised.

Not by the person in front of her, but by her own reaction.

She walked around the edge of the table and along the partition wall separating her from the entry. She walked past the pictures that had hung there on the walls of Steve's childhood home for years and turned the corner.

She didn't see Mary.

Surprising, but not shocking at all.

She saw James.

Surprising, yes. But really not all that remarkable in the grand scheme of things.

She wished Steve were there.

Surprising. Shocking. Remarkable.

Totally inexplicable.

What on earth would possess her to think of Steve at this moment? In this moment, her ex-boyfriend, almost fiancé, was standing in front of her, much the worse for wear since she had last seen him and holding a gun.

That's right.

A man she had considered herself in love with at one time was holding a gun.

And he wasn't a cop. She knew that much.

"James," she managed to get out, with only a moment of hesitation.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Her gaze locked on him. He thought he might die from happiness to see her. He was too caught up in taking in her appearance to really notice the pause before she said his name. The surprise was evident in her voice and he wondered if she thought he would never come back for her.

Unfortunately, the knowledge that one day he would return for her had been the only thing keeping him going for a long time.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She took him in. His floppy hair, which had always been clean from hours in the water, was greasy and darker from less sun. His skin seemed less healthy and his eyes looked deranged. His clothes were the same surfer style that he had always worn. Now though, the shirt was a little tighter, showing off his almost scary muscles (they'd be scary if she didn't see Steve everyday). The board shorts and sandals looked as relaxed as always if you didn't know he carried a gun in the waistband.

The gun. God, when and what had compelled him to do something that involved carrying a gun when he obviously wasn't law enforcement.

Which made him a criminal.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She was wearing a man's shirt.

That bothered him.

Actually, bothered was probably the wrong word.

Infuriated would be more accurate.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She saw his eyes land on her shirt.

She wondered what he thought.

She saw his eyes narrow and his muscles tense.

It put her on edge.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He wanted so many things from her right then. He wanted all the love he had been without in the years since he left. But he also carried so much anger. She was the reason his life had fallen apart. She had been everything to him and she had rejected him.

He wanted to hurt her for that.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She saw the anger in his eyes, but pushed on ahead anyway. If she could keep this calm and simple, everything would be fine.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"What am I doing here," he muttered to himself, shaking his head. Her ears caught the slight rasp in his voice that hadn't been there before.

"I thought that was obvious, Kono."

She furrowed her brow in confusion.

"I really don't know, James. I haven't seen you in years."

"And who's fault is that, hmm?" he asked, suddenly yelling and advancing on her quickly. He was waving the gun around, like he had simply forgot he was holding it.

She reached for her hip as she backed away. She should have remembered that her gun was upstairs in her room.

He laughed as she ran into the kitchen bar and he stopped just a few feet from her. "Searching for your gun, Kono? You know, I always knew you'd do something tough, even after the injury. It's part of who you are. But a cop? Really?"

"What do you want? And what have you done to Mary?" She tried to say it calmly, but without her gun, at a serious disadvantage with her wound, and trapped against the counter, she was starting to panic.

"Mary will be fine, I'm sure. I just wanted us to talk. Alone."

"Okay, what do you want to talk about?"

"Aren't you rushing things a little, Kai?"

Her nickname. The term of endearment that she thought she would never hear again. When they were originally getting to know each other, he had asked her to teach him some Hawaiian words. "Kai" meant sea and when they started dating, he began to call her that because of her love for the sea.

"Don't call me that," she said quietly. "I'm no longer that girl."

He took a step closer. "But you are, Kai. I still love you and I know that somewhere inside you, you still love me too."

His face was earnest, pleading for it to be true. It seemed like he needed it to be true.

But she couldn't lie.

"I don't love you James. I'm not sure I ever did."

"That's a lie!" he yelled, rushing her. One hand grabbed her wrist.

The other was around her throat.

She took a sudden breath, surprised by his sudden, violent reaction. She couldn't breathe, she couldn't quite process the words he was yelling at her.

"You abandoned me! Without you, I was nothing! I had nothing! I needed you and you rejected me! I loved you and you left because you were scared!"

She vaguely realized that he had changed the way things had happened. He was portraying _her_ as the one who left, when really he had left her. And that's when she knew that he was psychopathic. He had changed the facts so that he could blame her for the way his life had turned out when really it was his own fault.

Her vision began to go gray and she knew that she was losing consciousness. He was strong and her windpipe was completely shut off. She couldn't really control her motions, but she realized that her body had instinctively started to fight. He forced her to the floor and straddled her so she couldn't struggle. He grabbed both her wrists in one of his hands. He let go of her neck to pull a zip tie and a small roll of duct tape out of his back pocket.

She gasped for air. He bound her hands in front of her and covered her mouth. He was opening the buttons on her shirt. His hands were on her bare stomach. His hands were on her shorts. He pulled them down and then got off her.

She watched. She struggled. She tried to scream.

He pulled off his board shorts.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve looked at the clock.

The time hadn't changed.

He placed his head in his hands. He was seriously going crazy. He had been checking the clock obsessively now for almost 20 minutes, or since Chin had called to say that the Prius had checked out and they were following the tow truck with it to the lab. They had said they would be back in 30 minutes. That meant only ten minutes left until he could go home and see Kono. Only ten more minutes. He had to relax. Ten minutes. Kono was fine. Mary had taken care of her so far; they would be fine for ten more minutes. He had only been gone for about two hours and he would be home in ten minutes. If nothing catastrophic had happened yet, nothing was going to happen in ten minutes so he really needed to calm down. And Mary would call him if something did.

His phone rang.

That was some scary timing. Seconds after recognizing that Mary would call if something were wrong, Mary called.

"Mary? What's wrong?" He almost expected her to say that nothing was wrong, he was overreacting; they just wanted him to stop at the grocery store on the way home.

"Steve! Some man just came to the door and said he was a friend of Kono's and knocked me out. I'm locked in my trunk and I don't know where Kono is!"

Steve went white as a sheet and froze for a split second.

Then, "I'm on my way Mary! I have to make sure Kono's okay first and then I'll get you, okay!"

"Okay, just hurry!"

"I will!" He abruptly hung up and ran out the door, past the elevator, and down the stairs. He ran to his truck, speed dialing Danny as he ran.

As he slid into the drivers seat and started the engine, Danny answered.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Mary was knocked out by some guy claiming to be a friend of Kono's and she doesn't know where Kono is!"

"WHAT!" Danny yelled.

"I'm on my way there and could use some back up!"

"Okay, we're already driving back to the office, we'll be just a couple seconds behind you!"

"'Kay!" Steve said and then hung up the phone.

He really doubted that they were only a couple seconds behind him. He was driving almost twice the speed limit.

His tires squealed into the driveway and he launched himself out the door, drawing his gun. He ran up the front steps and opened the door.

He would never forget the sight in front of him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono struggled as he lay back over her. He kissed her all over her neck and down her chest. She could feel how hard he was against her thigh. One of his hands began to play with her underwear and she thrashed out against him.

He laughed. "You always were the wild one in bed, weren't you?" he whispered in her ear.

She felt the tears prick her eyes as he pushed himself harder against her. He hadn't taken off her underwear yet but she knew it was coming.

There was a squeal outside that her hyper-aware senses picked up, but James evidently didn't. She heard the slam of boots running up the steps and then the front door was thrown open.

She couldn't see the door. Actually, she couldn't see anything very clearly through the tears. But James looked up and reached for the gun that had fallen next to them.

She heard two shots.

James stumbled back and she could sort of see the red stains on his shirt. The bullets were in his right shoulder and abdomen.

She lay there, trembling and crying. But then Steve was there and he pulled her into his arms, pulling off the duct tape gently.

"I've got you sweetheart, I'm here. I've got you. You're safe, babe," he said in a soothing voice as she collapsed in tears against his chest.

She heard the sound of shoes around them and then Danny reading James his Miranda rights as Chin called for an ambulance. She didn't even look up. She just clung to Steve and cried. She felt him reach into his belt and then he cut the zip ties off her wrists.

She hands were now free to clutch at him desperately. He moved them so that she was sitting in his lap. As he continued to try to calm her down, she heard Danny go outside and come back with Mary. She could tell from the way Mary gasped when she saw them.

She hoped Mary would never bring up the way she was clinging to Steve.

They heard the ambulance approaching from down the street. She couldn't have that. She couldn't have all these people looking at her this way. She was a cop, she was strong, she didn't break down like this.

"No, no, no," she said into Steve's chest.

"Babe, what's wrong?" Steve asked, worry lacing his voice.

"No doctors, no ambulance," she said frantically, trying to speak through the tears and the panic.

"Are you sure you're not hurt?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm fine," she said brokenly, nodding frantically through the tears pouring down her face.

She could feel him think for a minute before she felt his arms drop to slide one under her knees and the other around her back. She caught on and wrapped one arm around his neck and buried her face there, not wanting to see what the others thought.

"We'll be upstairs if you need anything," he said.

Danny, Chin and Mary looked at each other as he carried the crying, terrified, and exhausted Kono upstairs.


	10. Chapter 10

**WOW! Amazing reaction to my last few chapters! Kind of been picking up the pace and I'm glad everyone still likes it. Please continue to review! Tell me what you like/dislike and what you want to see in the future, please! **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

"They're completely in love."

Chin and Danny looked at Mary incredulously.

"What? It's true!"

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve carried Kono up the stairs and into her room. He went to the bed and laid them down. She lay on top of him and clutched at his shirt, crying her heart out. He just held her.

There was nothing he could do to make it better.

He could only be there.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She gasped. She couldn't breathe. The panic was everywhere. It was in every bone of her body, it infected her mind, it made the edges of her vision fuzzy. Not that her vision wasn't fuzzy from the tears that couldn't seem to stop. She couldn't control any of it. It was like a foreign power had invaded her body.

Steve tightened his arms around her trying to stop her thrashing and comfort her.

But she just struggled more.

"NO, NO, NO!" she cried. "STOP!" She tried to hit him, her arms flailing as her body and mind panicked and refused to focus.

"Kono! It's me! It's Steve! KONO!"

She landed a hit in his stomach, knocking the wind out of him, and he released her, gasping for air.

She was off him in a second, rolling to the other side of the bed and standing up.

He lay there, trying to get his breath back. "Kono," he choked out. "Kono, baby, it's me."

She was suddenly coming to her senses. She looked at the man lying on the bed and she saw Steve. She saw him lying there, simply wanting to comfort her. She saw him worried about her. She saw him caring about her.

"Steve?" she whispered, arms crossed protectively in front of her body.

"Yeah, babe, it's me."

"Oh God, Steve," she whispered, breaking down again. She kneeled on the bed crawling over to him. The tears were running freely down her face again and she collapsed into his side, touching him to reassure herself that she hadn't hurt him too badly. "I don't know what came over me, you were you and then you were James and I don't understand what's going on! I didn't mean to hurt you!" she sobbed into him.

"Shh, Kono, it's okay. You're panicking. You need to calm down. Just take deep breaths. Remember that I'm here and Chin and Danny are downstairs and everything is going to be okay."

She nodded, trying to grasp onto his words. She tried to slow her breathing but it was hard when she was crying.

"Babe, just lay back," he said soothingly. He gripped her shoulders and gently rolled her off him so she was lying next to him. Slowly, her breaths started to slow and she seemed to calm down.

Her shirt was still unbuttoned and Steve suddenly became very worried.

"Kono, you've bled through your bandage. I think you pulled out some stitches. I'm going to call to Danny to send up a medic to check you out."

He made to get up but her small hand caught his large one. "No, Steve, would you check first? If they don't need to come up, I don't want them to."

He looked at her skeptically.

"Please?" she added.

He melted. "Okay." He sat back down and hesitated. He looked at her, waiting for her approval before he pulled the edge of her shirt over. This time she didn't freak out at all. She knew where she was and she knew that Steve would never hurt her.

He pulled her bra strap aside and then unwrapped her wound. He looked down at it, inspecting it for damage.

She looked up into his face instead of at the wound. She found both kindness and worry there. Anger and his attempt to repress it. All sorts of emotions that she had previously never been able to identify in him were suddenly clear. He had let her through his walls, allowed her to see his emotions. She tried to push through any remaining panic to memorize those emotions so that she could identify them later.

"Well, you pulled a few of them out for sure, but most look fine and the wound is already healing." He went to stand up again, and again, she grabbed his wrist.

He smiled. "It's okay. I have a first aid kit in the bathroom. I'll be back in one second."

She looked at him, pleading for him not to leave her.

"Trust me, Kono. I'm not going to leave you. I just need to grab the kit and put a few butterfly bandages over the wound."

She saw the sincerity in his eyes and released him. He stood and quickly walked down the hall, threw open the cabinet in the bathroom, grabbed the kit, and almost ran back to her.

He was surprised to find that she had closed her eyes and was taking slow, albeit shaky, breaths.

"Kono?"

Her eyes opened. "Um-hum?" she murmured.

He released a worried breath. "Okay. Thought you might have fainted there."

"I'm really tired," she said as he sat next to her. "I'm glad you're back."

He looked at her, wondering if he should point out that he had been gone under a minute.

But then he realized that it had felt like an eternity to him too.

So he let her slide on that one.

"Glad to be back." He leaned over her, gaining access to her wound again. He lightly pulled the butterfly bandage over the wound. She hissed in pain as he pushed lightly against the healing wound. "Sorry," he said.

"It's okay," she replied.

When he was done, he leaned back, rewrapped her bandage and buttoned up her shirt. "You should get some rest."

"Okay," she said, her eyes already fluttering closed.

He looked down at her for a second and then leaned over to kiss her forehead. Then he stood, moving to the door so she could sleep in peace.

"Where are you going?" her voice came from the bed behind him.

He turned around to look at her. Her bleary, tired eyes gazed back.

"You need to rest," he answered.

She looked at him. She nodded abruptly. She looked away. He thought he might have seen tears prick her eyes.

"Kono? What's wrong?"

She hesitated.

"Could you just stay with me for a while?" She took a shaky breath, on the verge of tears again. "I'm kinda freaked out right now. Could you just hold me until I fall asleep?"

Did she really think he could resist that?

He moved back over to the bed and pulled the covers out from under her. He pulled them up to cover her to her stomach and then leaned down to take off his boots. He slid under the covers and held his arms open.

She shuffled across the bed, curling herself into his chest, her head on one of his arms, the other wrapped around her waist. She tucked her head under his chin and her hands came to rest on him, one on the bicep under her head and the other on his waist. Her legs touched his along their whole length and their feet touched at the bottom.

She sighed shakily and closed her eyes, burrowing into him.

He watched her as her breaths evened out.

He watched her face as she slept.

He watched her until his own eyes fell shut.


	11. Chapter 11

The door opened and Steve woke, careful to not disturb Kono. It was Mary. He looked up at her, hoping she wasn't there to get him to leave.

"Danny's down stairs," she whispered. "He wants to talk to you."

"Can't we talk later?" he whispered back.

She shook her head.

Steve closed his eyes, hating his partner. Why? Why now? Why couldn't he just stay here with Kono? He opened his eyes again and slowly extracted himself from Kono. It was almost more than he could bear. She whimpered slightly as he pulled his arm out from under her head and all he wanted to do was stay right there with her.

Finally he was free and he bent over to kiss her forehead before he walked to Mary.

"Stay with her?" he asked.

"Of course."

He looked at her noticing the way her makeup had smeared, probably from crying. She had tried to fix it but he could see the difference. He knew her face so well.

"You okay, Mer?"

She nodded sadly and he pulled her into a hug.

"I'm so sorry, Mer. I never thought you would get hurt."

"It's okay Steve. Not your fault."

He pulled back to look at her. "Still. And I'm sorry I'm asking you this now and not when it happened."

She shrugged. "You had to take care of Kono."

"Mer, you're baby sister. I should have paid more attention to you."

"And you're in love with Kono. You have every right to pay more attention to her."

Steve stared, shocked, at Mary. "What are you talking about? I'm not in love with Kono!"

She just smiled. "Go talk to Danny. We'll be here when you're done."

He watched as she walked over to the chair that sat in the corner of the room and pulled it to the side of the bed. Then he shook his head, as he could somehow knock her words out of his mind, and walked down stairs to talk to Danny.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Danny was sitting down stairs at the bar. Steve walked over and past him into the kitchen. He grabbed two beers out of the fridge and walked back, handing one to Danny as he took a seat.

Danny watched him, judging his movements. He could tell that Steve was freaked out and really angry, which was understandable. Really, a guy had just knocked out his sister, locked her in a trunk and then gone to rape and probably murder his ex-girlfriend, their rookie, who Steve was very fond of.

_Very_ fond of.

Danny wasn't sure when that had happened. He wasn't even sure that Steve had noticed it had happened. It wasn't really his place to point it out.

"How's Kono?" he said quietly.

Steve put down his bottle, which was already a third empty, and looked down at it.

"Freaked out. Scared. She's sleeping right now."

Danny nodded, pausing.

"How're you?"

Steve looked over at him, alarmed. His walls were up, he didn't want to open up and talk about it. But then he softened, seeing that Danny wasn't trying to pry, just making sure that his partner and friend was okay. Wanting to give him a place to talk it out.

Steve sighed, looking back at the bottle. "I never should have left her. I should have realized that she was in danger." He brought his hands up to rub across his face. "Oh, God, what would have happened if Mary didn't call when she did? What if…?"

"No," Danny said. "You cannot think about the what ifs. They will drive you insane. Just focus on the fact that she is okay and he is going to go away for a very long time."

Steve took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down.

"Okay," he said. "What did you need?"

"You need to come into the office to write up the after action report."

"NO."

Danny looked at Steve, surprised.

"Absolutely not. I'm not leaving her until she is fit for duty and can carry her gun."

"Steve…"

"No, Danny. I'm not leaving her."

It was clear that he wasn't joking; in fact he was dead serious. Danny was pretty sure that Steve might pull his gun if he suggested it again. He knew when he had lost a fight.

"Okay. I'll bring you the papers tonight and you can call me when you're done. I'll come pick them up."

Steve relaxed and picked up his bottle again.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono twisted. Where was the solid wall of warmth that had been around her? Where was that familiar scent, slightly musky and salty? Where was…

"Steve?" she asked quietly, her eyes barely open.

"Steve?" she called.

Mary sat up in the chair next to the bed. "Kono, you're awake!"

Kono's eyes rotated to look at Mary. "Mary? Where's Steve?"

"He's down stairs with Danny."

"Where is he? Why isn't he here?"

Mary stared at her, confused. "He's right down stairs. Danny needed to talk to him."

Kono was breathing heavy, unsure where Steve was. For some reason that she really didn't understand at all, she was just as worried about Steve's safety as he seemed to be about hers. "I need Steve," she got out, starting to hyperventilate.

"Okay," Mary said, walking to the door. "Steve!" she called down.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Both Danny and Steve perked up when they heard Mary call. But Steve's bottle hit the counter and he was making his way up the stairs before Danny had even registered the meaning behind the call. He quickly followed Steve upstairs.

He saw Steve walk into Kono's room and drop onto the bed next to her, taking her hand in one of his and stroking her forehead with the other. Danny stood in the doorway and watched them.

"Kono, hon, what's wrong?" Steve asked.

She sighed and relaxed. "Nothing. I just didn't know where you were."

"I'm right here. I just needed to talk with Danny."

"Yeah, Mary told me. I just overreacted."

"You're still upset?"

She closed her eyes for a second. "I guess I'm just a little shook up is all. I feel… dirty."

Danny could see Steve's shoulders stiffen, but he nodded calmly.

Mary spoke up. "How about a long bath? That always helps me calm down." She didn't reference Kono's comment about feeling dirty. She too could see the affect on Steve.

Kono looked at Mary gratefully. "That sounds good," she said.

"Okay," Steve said. "I'll grab the stuff to wrap your shoulder."

Danny turned to walk out of the room with Steve. They went downstairs and Danny called Chin for an update while Steve ran the saran wrap and tape upstairs.

He went to the bedroom and knocked lightly. Mary answered and she took the things from Steve.

"I'll be downstairs," he told her.

From somewhere behind her, Kono spoke. "You're not going to leave, are you?"

Mary smiled softly as Steve answered. "No, I'm not going anywhere until you're fit for duty and can carry your weapon."

He half expected her to protest. Instead, all she said was, "Good."

Mary gave him one last smirk and closed the door.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Downstairs, Danny was sitting at the bar and had just finished his call with Chin when Steve walked down. "He'll be here in a minute," he said as Steve sat.

"He's not staying with James?"

"I think he's worried he'll attack James if he stays."

Steve shrugged, finishing off his bottle of beer and moving to get another one. Danny's hand on his arm stopped him.

"Maybe don't have another."

Steve sighed and sat back down. "I don't blame him for that."

"I don't think any of us do. Kono's a part of our little family. We protect each other."

They heard Chin pull up outside and waited for him to come in.

"Hey," he said, moving to stand next to them. "James is in surgery, should be out in a few hours. Half of HPD was there when I left. No chance he'll be going anywhere."

"Good," Steve said.

"How is she?"

"Okay. Mary's helping her take a bath, relax."

"Good. She's tough. She'll be fine."

Steve took a breath and nodded, as if trying to reassure himself. Chin reached out a hand to grasp his shoulder.

"Really, brah. She'll be okay."

"I know," Steve said.

Chin looked at Danny, who nodded. "Look, Steve, we get how you feel."

He looked up at them. "What are you talking about?"

"How you feel… about Kono," Danny clarified.

Steve looked from one to the other and back again. "Feel free to clue me in on what you're talking about here, and then maybe I'll be able to answer."

"So that's how it's gonna be, huh?" Danny asked. "Alright, we've figured out that you're in love with Kono."

His eyebrows shot up into the top of his head and Chin glanced at Danny, wondering if maybe they were actually wrong.

"Guys, seriously? I'm not in love with Kono! I love her, I'm not _in_ love with her."

Chin grinned. They were totally right. "Would you care to explain that distinction to us?"

Steve rolled his eyes. "I love her. Like I love Mary Ann." The guys looked at him. "Okay, maybe not exactly like I love Mary, but you get the idea. If I was _in _love with her, it would be a totally different story. Being _in _love with someone is the whole, 'til death do us part thing."

"So you're saying you don't want to spend the rest of your life with Kono?" Danny asked.

"No, not like that!"

Danny and Chin could tell that they weren't going to win this argument.

"Alright brah, what ever you say," Chin said. "You ready to go Danny?"

"Yeah, let's go. I'll drop the papers by later, okay?"

"Sure," Steve said.

"Alright, bye," Danny said, following Chin out the door.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Mary was leaning against the wall next to the bathtub. Kono was sitting in the tub, covered in bubbles from the lavender bubble bath that Mary had.

"This was a really good idea," Kono murmured quietly, her eyes closed as her head leaned against the back of the tub. "The only thing I need now is a beer."

Mary stood and Kono watched as she went to the door. She opened it and called, "Steve! We need two beers!"

Kono laughed. A minute later, Steve appeared outside and handed Mary the two beers.

"Thank you!" Mary said cheerfully. And then she slammed the door shut in Steve's face with her hip.

They heard him chuckle outside the door and then go downstairs.

Mary handed Kono her beer and settled back down with her own.

After a minute, she spoke. "Crazy day, huh?"

Kono quietly said, "Yep."

"You okay?" Mary asked, turning to look at Kono.

"I'm fine."

"Don't say you're fine if you're not fine. It's just us here Kono. You're not a cop here and I'm not Steve's baby sister. Just us two girls."

Kono paused, sighing slightly. Finally, she spoke. "I feel lucky."

Mary smiled but didn't say anything.

Kono looked over at her. "What?"

"Just not what I was expecting you to say. Why do you feel lucky?"

Kono pulled her foot out of the water and looked at it, hesitating. "When I was 19, James asked me to marry him. I said no and he disappeared. I guess I feel lucky that I was smart enough to say no and that he left. I can't imagine what life would have been like if I said yes or what he might have done to me if he hadn't just left. And of course I feel lucky that Steve came when he did."

Mary nodded. "Yeah."

"And you know what else? Steve and the guys are all worried about me, but I am equally worried about Steve! What's up with that? I mean he hasn't been hurt!"

Mary smiled. "I think you're worried about how Steve is reacting to your being hurt."

Kono looked at her. "You know that makes almost no sense, right?"

"Yeah, but can you deny it?"

Kono looked at her for a minute before just completely ignoring her. Mary smiled to herself.

"I guess I just can't quite believe it. I mean that was so not the James I knew. He was fun and loving and yeah we fought a lot but that was mostly because our personalities clashed all the time. I mean was tough and independent and he wanted to hold onto me, protect me. I didn't want that and he couldn't get that."

"I know the type," Mary said.

"Yeah and can you imagine being married to some one like that?"

"Nope. Not ever."

"I'm just trying to figure out what happened, you know? Like how did he become the person who did this stuff today."

"I don't know."

Kono was silent and then… she sniffled slightly. Mary turned to look at her.

"Kono? What's up?"

She swallowed. "He said that it was my fault. That it was my fault his life turned out like it did. What if he's right? What if I could have saved him from… himself?"

"Kono, don't do that! You can't think about the what ifs! They will drive you insane!"

She nodded. "Right. Just focus on the present, right?"

"Exactly. Think about everything you have."

Kono looked over at Mary. She was smiling.

"Why do I feel like you are thinking about things that I'm not?"

"Probably because I am."

"Do I want to know?"

"How about you tell me what you were thinking of?"

Kono narrowed her eyes at her and then gave in. "I was thinking that I have a job I love, a team that is like a family to me, and that I still have surfing."

Mary nodded, looking expectant. Kono watched her warily.

"Anything else?" Mary prompted.

Kono raised an eyebrow at her. "No…"

Mary sat back against the wall and took a drink. "Oh-kay."

Kono took a drink too and relaxed back into the tub. She noticed that Mary kept glancing over at her. Finally she'd had enough.

"WHAT?" she cried.

"Nothing!" Mary answered.

"You keep looking at me!"

Mary started giggling. "Really, it's nothing!"

"I _so_ do not believe you! You know I will figure out a way to make you tell me, right?"

Mary suddenly stopped laughing and looked warily at Kono. "What are you going to do?"

"Why don't you just tell me and then you won't have to find out?"

Mary watched her. "I don't think you're going to do anything."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, really!"

"Okay then…"

And Kono splashed her.

"AHHH!" Mary squealed, scrambling away from the tub. "KONO! What was that for!"

They heard steps on the stairs and Kono broke down into laughter.

"Kono? Mary? You guys okay in there?" Steve asked from outside the door.

Mary glared at Kono as she laughed and then spun around to yank open the door. Steve took a step back when he saw her.

"We are perfectly fine, Steve!"

"Okay, just checking. What happened to you?"

Kono burst into another fit of laughter. Mary glared at her. "Kono splashed me!"

Steve started to laugh now. "Well I'm sure that if Kono splashed you, you deserved it."

Mary's hand flew out to hit him in the stomach. "Shut up!" And she slammed the door in his face again.

They heard him laughing outside the door and then go downstairs again.

"You want to tell me now?" Kono said through her giggles.

Mary scowled. "Fine. You didn't say Steve. But I could see you were thinking it."


	12. Chapter 12

_Mary scowled. "Fine. You didn't say Steve. But I could see you were thinking it."_

Kono laughed. "Mary, I'm pretty sure he falls under 'a team that's like family to me'." She pulled the plug and stood as the water ran out of bath. She pulled the curtain shut and turned on the shower to wash off the bubble bath.

Mary didn't see her face suddenly grow serious.

"Kono, you know what I mean!" Mary whined, sitting on the toilet. "I know you like him!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Mer," Kono said teasingly, although her face was far from teasing. She turned the water off and stepped out of the shower, plastering the teasing look on so Mary didn't catch her and taking the towel Mary offered her.

Mary raised her eyebrows. "So that's how it's gonna be, huh? You're just gonna deny it."

Kono smiled sweetly at her, eyes twinkling. "Deny what?"

Mary groaned. "Whatever. I know, even if you two won't admit it."

Kono laughed and wrapped the towel around her body, opening the door and walking down the hall to her bedroom. Mary followed, scowling, to help Kono dress.

Steve listened to Kono laughing upstairs.

They were going to be fine.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

The rest of the day went perfectly smoothly. Normal even.

For them.

Mary spent the rest of the day in front of the TV, eating junk food that she had called to ask Danny to bring by with the reports. Kono watched in fascination as whole bags of chips and pints of ice cream disappeared into Mary's tiny body.

Kono had taken her book and another beer out onto the lanai. That was when she had discovered something that was rather distracting to her reading.

Steve was doing laps.

Well sort of. Really, as far as ogling went, they were _way_ better than just laps.

In fact, she wondered why she had ever been interested in laps.

He would swim from one edge of the property to the other and back a few times, get out of the water and then run – she's not making this up here – back and forth across the beach a few times. Dripping wet. In swim trunks. He was doing his old football and SEAL exercises. Then before he went back in the water he would do some curl ups and other SEAL things that she could even begin to imagine attempting. Her body literally ached watching him do it.

She wasn't sure if it was because she could imagine how hard the exercises were or how they would make his body feel against hers.

Yeah, she didn't do much reading.

Finally he came up the beach, looking like he had worked out hard but could still run a mile in under six minutes. Multiple times. _Seriously, how does he do that?_ she thought.

She managed to hide her appreciative looks as he came up the beach towards her behind her oversized sunglasses. When she could actually hear him and fake that she hadn't been watching, she turned to look up at him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

_Holy fucking shit, you have got to be kidding me, _Steve thought as he walked up the beach. He had known that Kono was sitting out on the lanai but he hadn't expected this.

She was wearing denim shorts – short shorts, like booty shorts, mind you – and his white shirt. White. His. So white, in fact, that in the evening sunlight, the purple bra she wore underneath was quite visible to him. He could actually see the lace. She had tucked the shirt into the shorts and rolled the sleeves up like the day before and he couldn't help but think that she looked mighty fine in his shirt. Her hair was up in a high ponytail and looked bouncy and happy, in a very hot catch-me-if-you-can way.

He wondered if Mary had done that on purpose.

The worst part though was the way her legs were stretched out on the lounge chair. One was slightly bent, her book resting on her upper thigh, her foot tucked under the other knee. The other leg was stretched out straight, enticing him to notice how long and perfectly tanned her legs were.

He swallowed sharply.

_Keep it together brah, she'll notice you any second now._

And of course, she did.

Her head tilted up to look at him and the oversized sunglasses thing had never looked so good to him before. She smiled at him and he tried not to focus on her full lips.

"You ready for dinner?" he asked.

Mistake.

"Sure," she said. His focus was now, of course, completely on her full lips as they moved fluidly, forming such a simple word.

_Oh shit. _

"Great, I'll just go take a shower and then get started." He glanced one last time back at her gorgeous… everything… and then made his escape.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Dinner went smoothly and the three of them spent the evening watching Next Top Model, which apparently both Kono and Mary liked. Steve spent the evening laughing at them, rather than actually watching.

They went to bed early after such an exhausting day. Mary helped Kono but she was mostly able to do it herself. She was getting used to the whole one-armed thing.

The house was silent and nothing disturbed their peaceful sleep.

Except for Kono.

_He was there, on top of her. She could feel how hard he was against her thigh and she knew what was coming. He played with the edge of her underwear and then they were gone. He was all over her, his hands, his lips, everywhere. She hated it, she struggled, she didn't want this, damn it! _

_They were over and she was sorry for whatever had happened in his life, but that didn't justify this!_

_Then his boxers were gone and his hands were on her waist. _

_It was the same way he had always liked to enter her. They had been young and he had liked this position best. It was the one he was really good at. _

_But this time it hurt. _

Her eyes flew open and she muffled the scream that had been on the tip of her tongue. Her body was drenched in sweat. Her chest was heaving with the ragged gasps that burned their way down her throat.

She wasn't safe. She didn't feel safe. She was scared.

For the first time ever she was truly, honest to god, scared.

She had been in firefights. She had taken down violent suspects all by herself. She had been taken hostage. She had broken her knee at 19 and thought her life was over.

The fear she had felt then was nothing compared to this.

Terror.

Pure terror.

It coursed through her veins, freezing her in place. She couldn't move. Rational thought was few and far between.

There was only one thing that made sense right now.

Only one thing that could help her.

_Get to Steve. _

Her body wouldn't move. Finally, she managed to get out of the bed and move toward the door. It cost her more than it should have. She was shaking and breathing hard. She had to try four times to open the door and then another three to step out the door and begin walking down the hall.

Somehow she made it to Steve's room.

She opened the door and she began to walk toward his bed. She was half way there when he woke. His hand reached to the gun on the bedside table but she managed to let out a small, strangled gasp.

He dropped the gun and sat up, looking at her in the moonlight. She moved quicker than before once she saw his face. It was the most comforting thing to her. The worry, the confusion, these were the things that told her he cared.

"Kono?" he whispered.

She didn't answer, waiting until she had reached the edge of the bed and had something to hold onto.

"Kono? Are you okay?"

Her upper thighs hit the mattress.

"Steve."

Her voice was like nothing she had ever heard come out of her mouth before. It was strangled, gasping and she stopped with just his name because she knew that nothing else needed to be said.

He opened his arms. "Oh Kono, come here."

So she did. She brought her knees up onto the bed, crawling over to him. She collapsed in his embrace.

"It's okay, babe, I've got you. You're okay," he whispered to her soothingly.

Her throat burned as she tried to calm down, to control her gasping body. She intertwined herself with Steve, trying to get as close to him as possible. He was the earth, he was gravity pulling her back down.

He tried not to react as her naked legs intertwined with his. He tried to ignore that she was only wearing a thin tank top and panties and he was only wearing his boxers. She hadn't cared that they were almost naked. Maybe she needed the skin on skin contact.

And honestly, it wasn't that hard.

She needed him. She needed his comfort.

That was all that mattered right now.

So yeah. He could control himself.

Because she was the most important thing in his world and he would always be exactly what she needed.


	13. Chapter 13

**I have decided on a few things. I will tell you all about them as they appear in the next chapters. The one that I think I should address now is that I decided on a time frame. For the purposes of this story it is currently late April. I have reasons and they will make sense later. **

**Thank you to all my wonderful reviewers and especially Diana (cm757). You are awesome! (And you know it) I feel like I'm getting on the bandwagon with pretty much every other author in this fandom by saying that, because I'm pretty sure she helps all of us. **

**So let me say again: you rock! **

**Reviews make me smile. They make me update faster. They also let me know what you like. So review, please! **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Mary had to get out of the house.

She didn't want to.

She _needed_ to.

Being around two people, who were completely in love with each other and dead set on denying it, was exhausting.

It had started out that morning. She had woken up and gone down the hall to the bathroom. At the end of the hall Steve's door had been open. He never left his door open so she had gone down to investigate.

Steve had been stretched out on his stomach. His arms were crossed above his head and his cheek rested against his forearms. His eyes were open and he was watching Kono.

That's right.

Kono.

She was sleeping next to him, her head turned to towards him. She was on her back, knees slightly bent and apart under the thin sheet. She had pushed the sheet off her chest – she slept hot – and her hand rested next to her face, just off the edge of the pillow.

The intimacy of the situation is striking.

Mary just smiled.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She felt herself waking up. She sighed, stretching slightly and then relaxing. She was _so _comfortable.

She opened her eyes slowly but quickly shut them again.

It was also _really _bright.

_Damn. It must be late,_ she thought.

But she couldn't really bring herself to care.

The bed was exceedingly soft and comfortable around her body. The sheets were silky and draped around her body like water. She was warm and floating and the comforting smell of musk and salt wrapped around her body. It embraced her and filled her senses with calm and serenity.

Wait.

What?

Musk and salt?

That's when she noticed the heavy, warm presence of another body on the other side of the bed.

Steve knew the moment she realized he was there. Her slight, sleepy smile turned into a confused frown and then she stiffened, her frown becoming less confused and more serious. He smiled and helped with the whole waking up thing.

"Morning, sunshine," he said quietly.

Her face turned more towards him and then her eyes blinked rapidly against the bright light. She stretched, pulling one hand up to rub her face. And finally, opening her eyes.

Her dark, deep brown eyes looked at him, hazy with sleep.

He had to keep his breath from hitching. Her eyes had always been beautiful to him. They were like a window into her soul. They crinkled when she laughed. They were quick to show hurt and anger. She was such a good undercover agent, he honestly believed the emotions he often saw in her were true, even though he knew they was false, because she poured her whole self into it (she may think it's just cause she's the girl and Danny may think he likes dressing her up in obscene outfits – which he's not denying – but he actually believes she's the best undercover he's ever seen). And he always knew where he stood because of the way she looked at him.

Kono panicked for a few seconds. _How the fucking hell did I get in here? What exactly happened last night? _Under the guise of stretching, she moved her hips against the mattress.

Okay. So she was wearing underwear. That was a good sign.

"Hey," she mumbled back at him. "What happened last night?"

He propped himself up against his hand. "Well I was kind of hoping you'd be able to tell me."

_Oh, shit. _Maybe she had been a little too comforted by the underwear. All sorts of stuff could happen fully clothed.

She attempted to hide her distress by closing her eyes again. "What do you remember?"

He rolled over onto his back, looking up at the ceiling. "Well, I was asleep and then I heard someone in my room. And then you kind of… gasped, I guess." Her eyes opened, horror falling heavy in her chest. She remembered. "And when I turned, I couldn't really see your face but I could tell that something was wrong because you were having a hard time breathing. Then you spoke and I knew that you were having a panic attack. So I just held you until you fell asleep."

She breathed deeply, trying not to show how distressed she was by this. But when he stopped talking he could hear her labored breaths.

"Kono?" he said, raising his head off the pillow to look over at her.

She rolled to the other side and curled up into a tight ball, closing her eyes tightly to block him out.

"Kono, babe, what's wrong?" He reached out a hand to touch her back put she writhed away from his hand. He got the message and backed off. "Kono, please, just tell me. You're kind of freaking me out here." And she could hear it in his voice. She was actually scaring him.

Why did it bother her that she had an affect on him?

"I don't want to think about it," she whispered.

"Kono, maybe it would help to talk about it," he said softly.

"No, I don't want to!" She shook her head violently to emphasize her point. Since when did she sound like such a petulant child?

He sighed. "I'm here Kono. If you want to talk about it, I'm here."

She felt him get out of bed and move across the room. She heard a bureau drawer open and then him pulling on his clothes. She heard him move towards the door. She knew that if she wanted to tell him she would have to do it now.

"I had a nightmare," she whispers.

It was enough to make him stop, but she was pretty sure he didn't actually hear her words.

He moved back toward the bed, coming to sit on the end so that her toes were touching his thigh. He reached down to hold her ankle through the sheet, his thumb stroking along the bone and silently encouraging her to continue. It was strangely comforting.

But she knew that in certain other situations, it would be highly erotic.

She tried not to think about that.

"I had a nightmare," she started again.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" he asked after a beat of silence.

She sniffled, but nodded. He waited patiently for her to continue. The words she said haunted him for weeks.

"I dreamed about the… what-ifs."

He stiffened and then rotated off the bed, coming to crouch in front of her. He placed his palm on her cheek and her eyes fluttered open.

"I will never let them hurt you Kono."

It was exactly what she needed to hear and her eyes welled with tears. She nodded against his palm and smiled. He smiled back and his nearness comforted her. His bright blue eyes that had always mesmerized her like the ocean she loves looked back at her with a slightly worried smile in them.

"I know, Steve."

He smiled for real then, just a small smile, but enough to tell her that he was no longer worried.

"Good," he said. "I'm going to go make breakfast. You get up whenever you want. If you want a shower, I'm sure Mary could help you."

"Okay. A shower sounds good."

"Alright, I'll tell her." He gave her one last lingering smile and then stood.

As he reached the door he heard her call out, "Could we have waffles?"

He laughed. "Sure."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve walked downstairs to find Mary looking through the Sunday paper. He hadn't even realized it was Sunday.

"Morning," he said cheerily.

"Good morning."

Steve walked to the coffee pot and poured himself a mug.

"I'm surprised I didn't hear you guys. But I bet you're being careful," Mary said thoughtfully behind him. _Wait for it, wait for it, _she thought deviously.

He turned to look at her. "What are you talking about, Mer?"

She looked up from her paper. "Just reminding you to be careful not to pull out her stitches, Steve."

"Why would I pull out her stitches?" he asked, completely confused. He reached up into the top of the cabinet to grab the waffle mix.

"Come on Steve. I did see her in your bed."

Steve turned so fast, he dropped the waffle mix.

"WHAT! Mary!"

She looked completely innocently at him. "What?"

"Kono and I… We… Mary!"

She burst out laughing. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry, I just wanted to see your reaction! And it was _so _worth it!"

He groaned and rubbed his hands across his face. "God Mary, why would you even say that?"

"Because I'm me and I'm not blind."

He looked at her as he set the waffle mix on the counter. "Oh, so you've joined the 'Steve's in Love with Kono' camp, have you?"

"Pretty sure I started it," she said smugly.

He glared at her. "Of course you did."

He pulled out the stuff to make waffles. "Kono wants to take a shower before breakfast," he said over his shoulder.

"Oh, okay. I'll go up now." She closed her paper and turned to walk up the stairs.

"And if you talk to her about this, I'll kick you out!"

"I promise I won't!" she called back, starting upstairs. "Is she still in your bed?"

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Mary really did try to not talk to Kono about her conversation with Steve. She really did.

She would call it rephrasing.

"So, what exactly happened last night?" she asked as Kono stood in the shower.

"I had a nightmare."

Mary wasn't quite ready to admit how serious that could have been. So she stuck with her much more up-beat plan. "Uh-huh. Right."

Kono stuck her head out of the shower, holding the shampoo.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," Mary sang innocently.

"Mary… Don't make me splash you again!"

Mary scowled at her as she went back in the shower to rinse. "Are you sure you weren't just trying to jump my brother?"

"Mary! Really? Again!"

"Just wondering!"

"And don't call him your brother. It's weird."

Mary grinned.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

After breakfast, during which Mary had tried her hardest to not say anything awkward and also to ignore the exceedingly happy looks that Kono and Steve unconsciously directed at each other, Steve went out on the lanai with the paper and Kono followed him with her book. It was already late morning and it was getting warm.

Mary went upstairs and showered, getting ready to go shopping with her friends. Breakfast had nearly driven her insane. Their hands had touched so many times but they never seemed to notice or react. They looked at each other with so much warmth and love, but neither seemed to acknowledge it. They seemed to communicate completely silently, by cues that she could never pick up on. It was infuriating!

When she walked downstairs, she looked out to see the back of their heads over the top of the lounge chairs next to each other on the lanai. She watched as Steve reached out to the table between them and grabbed his coffee mug, bringing it to his lips and then returning it to the table.

_God, they're so domestic. _

She walked out onto the lanai and stood next to them.

"What are you guys, identical?"

One pair of oversized sunglasses and one pair of aviators looked up at her, confusion written all over their faces.

_Definitely identical,_ she thought.

"You realize it's like a hundred and five degrees out and most people are hiding inside. Yet you two seem perfectly happy to sit out here in the heat like it's your second home."

"There's a perfectly nice breeze out, Mer," Steve said.

"Doesn't change the fact that it's A HUNDRED AND FIVE DEGREES!"

"We're by the water, Mary," Kono said. "It's cooling and calming."

She stared at them. "You two are certifiably insane. It's like you share a brain."

Then she turned on her heel and walked out smiling to herself. "See you guys later!"


	14. Chapter 14

**Hey ya'll, I'm back! Really needed a break there. I went AWOL over Thanksgiving – left town, got some sun, turned off my phone, didn't check email, saw some friends… it was awesome. Just what I needed. **

**So I really need to rant about that most current episode. (You've been warned.)**

**WHAT THE HELL ARE THE WRITERS DOING? **

**So they leave Kono on the ground with tech stuff. Okay, I get it: she's the best with the tech stuff and they can't let the girls go in with the SEALs (I have issues with that, but I get it). But seriously! Lori gets to be helpful with the rocket and scouting. Why can't Kono be important too? She's on tech! Doesn't that mean that she could be talking to them through their headsets and helping out (which would give her more voice time and influence than Lori in that scene)? **

**Here's what should have happened. Kono should have been being helpful on the headsets (which they should have had in the first place). When they found Jenna's body, it should have cut to her for a minute and we would have seen her be sad (look down, take a deep breath, blink a few times?). They were sort of friends and kinda similar and what we love her most for (other than kicking butt and looking hot doing it) is her heart. And when they found Steve, the guys would have told her and we would have seen her… I don't know, cover her mouth and suppress tears of happiness? That would make up for Lori hugging him… sort of. **

**That's if Lori was there. If Kono had been there instead of Barbie, we would have seen a much more awesome, well-acted scene involving a really hot woman (not a fucking Barbie impersonator) firing a rocket launcher. It would have been interesting, emotional, complex, conflicted… because that's what Kono is and that is how Grace Park is such a good actress! **

**If you think I should expand this into an alternate ending one-shot, drop me a line. Cause I think that even I could write that last scene better than they did. I want to know if you guys are interested. I might do it even if you're not. **

**If you think Lori needs to go (and seriously, who doesn't at this point?) you should go here and sign the petition: **

**http : / www . change . org / petitions / cbs-eye-productions-removal-of-the-character-lori-weston-from-the-cbs-show-hawaii-five-0-2 **

**(Just take out the spaces. Trying to trick FanFiction into letting me put up a link!) **

**This chapter is dedicated to cm757 (Diana!). She has generously loaned me her amazing character, Carla, who is definitely the perfect BFF for Kono. If you haven't read her stories, I highly recommend checking them out. If you write for this fandom, you probably already know Diana. She's awesome! I love you, hon! **

**Hope everyone's Thanksgiving was awesome! I'm still recovering. **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She was bored.

She had been sitting in the coffeeshop for the past half hour. It was entirely possible that for the first time in her life, Kono had forgotten to call and say that she was late or had to cancel. Carla had decided to give her a half hour. But that time was up and now she was going to kick that girls butt.

What? She had never claimed to be patient.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono sat in the Adirondack chair facing the ocean. Her book was open in her lap and her ice cold lemonade was on the side table between her and Steve. The breeze off the ocean made the weather perfect and she was at peace.

Steve had gotten his book after he had finished the paper. Kono hadn't been surprised to find that it was a Stephen King book.

So predictable.

It was a little after noon what Steve put down his book. "How about lunch?"

She looked over at him with a smile and his heart fluttered.

"Sure. What did you have in mind?"

"I have salad stuff."

She raised an eyebrow, a bemused smirk pulling on her lips. "Salad stuff?"

He smiled bashfully. "Yeah, you know, lettuce, fruit, veggies, I might have some chicken…"

She smiled with a little laugh. "That sounds prefect. Could you grab me some more lemonade also?"

"So demanding…" he teased as he took her glass and went inside.

She smiled after him and turned back to her book. Before she could start reading though, her phone gave a little tri-tone ring that signaled a text. It was from Carla.

_WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?_

"Shit!" Kono swore loudly, opening her phone and speed dialing Chin.

"What's wrong?" Steve said, walking out with a new glass of lemonade.

She held up a hand to make him shut up and leaned forward in her seat, anticipating Chin answering.

"_Hey cuz!" _he answered.

"Chin! Did you tell Carla I was shot?"

"_Carla? Who's Carla?"_

"Carla! My best friend since I was eight!"

"_Oh Carla! No, I didn't even think – "_

"Obviously! I can't believe I didn't notice it before!"

"_Look, calm down – " _

"I gotta go, cuz. Talk to you later." She ended the call abruptly, immediately dialing another number.

"Uh, what's going – " Steve started to ask.

"One second Steve," Kono said apologetically.

"_HONEY!" _came the scream from the other end of the phone. Kono had to pull the phone away from her ear. _"Where the hell are you? You've _never_ been late without calling!" _

"I know, I'm sorry! Carla I need to tell you something and please don't freak out."

"_No promises. The last time you said that was when you applied for the police academy!" _

Kono paused and took a breath. "Carla I was shot."

Silence.

"Carla?"

"_WHY THE HELL DID NO ONE TELL ME?"_

"Carla, calm down – "

"_CALM DOWN! I just found out that my BEST FRIEND was SHOT and you expect me to CALM DOWN!" _

"No, but I can imagine the looks you're getting – "

"_Just – just shut up. I'm coming over." _

"I'm not at home. I'm at Steve's."

"_As in STEVE, your boss?"_

Kono glanced up at him before leaning over a little more and letting her hair hide her face. "Yeah, that one."

Steve smirked. Apparently he had been a topic of conversation.

"_Okay, then I'm coming there. Not like I haven't been dying to meet him anyway." _

"Uh, are you sure?"

"_Honey, we do lunch and coffee and surfing every Sunday. That plan can change, but we always get together on Sundays. Plus you were shot and I have an absurd protective streak that makes me need to make sure you're okay." _

"Okay," Kono sighed and gave her the address. She heard Carla slam her car door and start the engine.

"_See you in ten."_

"It'll be closer to twenty – "

"_Hon, you've been SHOT. I am scared SHITLESS and NEED to see you RIGHT NOW. So DO NOT start lecturing me about speeding laws!" _

Kono smiled. "Just saying, it will take longer to get here if you get a ticket."

"_I'll take that under advisement." _There was a squealing of tires going around the corner and Kono cringed. _"See you in five."_

"Carla – "

"_Bye!" _

"Carla!"

But she had hung up.

Kono sighed, looking up at Steve. "We have a guest for lunch."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Carla's sky blue Mini Cooper squealed up the driveway, screeching to a stop in front of the house. She jumped out of the car, her light brunette ponytail swishing behind her. She pulled off her sunglasses, bounded up the front steps and pounded on the front door until it swung open, revealing Steve.

She was momentarily speechless.

"Hi, you must be Carla," he said warmly, stepping aside for her to enter.

"Uh, yeah," she said, trying to hide her appreciation of his physique.

"Come on in, Kono's on the lanai."

Carla looked around as she walked through the house to the doors out to the lanai. He was right behind her, going into the kitchen.

"We were about to have lunch. Salad with fruit, veggies and chicken. Have you eaten?"

"Uh, no. That sounds great." She smiled at him before walking out onto the lanai, where she could see Kono sitting in one of the Adirondack chairs.

"Kono," she cried, kneeling slightly to hug her best friend tightly.

"Uh, left shoulder," Kono choked out.

"Oh! Sorry," Carla said, pulling away a little, her hands floating around Kono's shoulders.

Kono undid a few buttons on her shirt (which Carla noticed was a light blue _men's_ shirt. She didn't say anything.) She slid the shirt off her shoulder, revealing a large square of gauze taped down underneath the strap of her pink and gray-lace low cut bra.

Carla stared at it for a moment, then looked at Kono, a hard look in her eyes. "Did you say left shoulder?" she asked slowly.

"Yes."

"As in, the side your heart is on?" her voice was steadily becoming higher.

Kono sighed, fearing Carla's reaction. "Yes."

Carla stared at her, looking angry and shocked. Kono waited for the yelling, but it never came. Instead, Carla's face softened. She reached out for Kono and hugged her gently for a long moment, as if needed a physical reminder that she was still here, only injured, not dead.

"I'm just glad you're okay," this girl who was like a sister to her whispered in Kono's ear.

Kono smiled, holding back tears. Carla had always been the one constant in her life.

"Me too," she whispered back.

The two young women sat, holding each other for an unknown amount of time, each basking in the comfort given by the other.

Steve looked out the window as he walked towards the lanai, two bowls of salad and a lemonade in his hands. He smiled. They were obviously very close. He wondered just what they had been through together to make them so close. It seemed to be beyond just basic friendship.

They heard him approaching and separated looking up at him. Carla stood.

"I brought you a lemonade, hope that's okay?" he said as he stepped onto the lanai.

"Yeah," Carla said, smiling and taking it and a bowl of salad from him.

He reached past her to Kono, handing her a bowl as well.

His eyes darted down to her chest, where the flirty bra was still showing from underneath his shirt.

She blushed slightly but didn't move. That would just make it worse.

He had never seen her in a truly sexy bra. When he had needed to help her change the bandage and get dressed, she had always worn a basic, neutral colored bra. Now he had seen her in a much more revealing, sexy bra.

He definitely hadn't looked upset about it either.

_Just another thing to add to the list of confusing events, _she thought. Her boundaries were being seriously stretched these days.

Not that that was a bad thing.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve went back inside, saying he would let them talk and would check in with the guys. He shut the door with a joke about not wanting to hear them talking about him.

He had no idea how right he was.

Kono covertly buttoned the shirt back up once Steve was back inside and Carla was in the process of sitting down in the chair next to her. Carla glanced over as she took her first bite. Kono looked a little flushed.

"You okay there honey?" she asked teasingly. "You look a little flushed."

Kono just took her first bite and then said, "Really? Maybe I've been sitting out here too long."

Carla snorted. "Yeah right. You don't burn, first of all, and second, you always wear sunscreen. So don't play dumb with me, missy!"

Kono sighed. "What do you want me to say Carla?

"Oh, maybe just admit that you understated how hot your boss is and how much you like him?"

"So he is pretty attractive. I have never denied that."

" 'Pretty attractive'? Honey, he's like sex on legs!"

Kono looked at her, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, come on don't deny it. I can see on your face that you totally think he's the definition of hot."

"Why does everyone think that I like him as more than a friend?" she asked, frustrated.

"Maybe it's because of that nice blush you got going from when he looked at your bra? And don't think I didn't notice you are wearing one of his dress shirts. You know how much guys like it when girls wear their clothes," she teased.

"It's easier to get on and off by myself, that's all."

" 'By yourself', right…" she said suggestively.

"How's Mike?"

Carla laughed. "Nice segue. He's good. He likes it when I wear sexy bras under his shirts. Not that he doesn't prefer me naked, of course."

"Uh, Carla! Not what I asked!" Kono complained.

"You asked how he was! I just answered," she teased.

Kono glared at her as she chewed. She swallowed. "You're going to make me talk about this, aren't you?"

Carla laughed. "Oh honey, you're so cute! Acting like you don't know me!"

Kono scowled. "Shut up. You're worse than Mary," she muttered, moodily taking another bite.

"Who's Mary?"

"Steve's sister, and that still sounds weird," she added to herself. "She's been talking about this since she got here."

"Ooh, his sister? No wonder he understands girls so well," Carla gushed.

"They had almost no contact from the time he was 18 and she was 13 until last year."

"So?"

Kono rolled her eyes at Carla's stubbornness. "Nothing."

"So what's she like?"

Kono thought for a minute. "Kind, funny, sweet… she's a lot like you actually. Just with less natural caffeine."

Carla grinned at her. "Really? Do I have competition here?"

"No, never. She's family though, because Steve is."

"Oh, so Steve's family?"

"Yeah."

"Like a brother."

"Yeah."

"Say that to my face," Carla said smugly.

Kono looked up from her bowl, her loaded fork hovering in front of her face. "What?" she asked, confused.

"Tell me to my face that you think of him as just a brother."

Kono stared at her, trying to steady her face so that Carla wouldn't catch her lie.

"And don't even TRY to lie to me, cause you know your eyes will always give you away."

Kono struggled for another moment before admitting slight defeat to herself.

"Ok, so maybe not a brother…"

"HA! I knew it! You like him!"

Kono didn't answer.

"Ooh, silence, no better way to confirm it than that!"

"Carla, just stop. I will never admit that."

"Well, you just wait until I get you really drunk and then we'll see about that!"

"Carla I have a concussion. No heavy drinking for a while."

Carla frowned. "Well that sucks. I was going to get you to go this new club next week."

"And the gun shot wound didn't put a damper in those plans?" Kono smirked at her.

"Well I thought you'd be healed enough to go by then," Carla said with a pout.

Kono smiled. "Girl, you're too funny," she chuckled.

"Yeah whatever." Carla set her bowl down on the table next to Kono's already empty one. "Come on, since we're obviously not surfing today, let's go sunbathe."

"Sure," Kono said. They stood, each grabbing their bowls and glasses. They went inside and Kono took the bowl from Carla taking it to the sink. Carla smiled as she watched Kono rinse off the bowls and then place them in the dishwasher, obviously knowing right where they were supposed to go. Then Kono turned and went to the fridge, grabbing the lemonade from its place like she could do it in her sleep.

When Kono turned around to fill the two glasses with more lemonade, she saw Carla's smirk. "What?" she asked warily.

"Nothing," Carla answered quickly.

Kono raised an eyebrow, then turned away to put the lemonade back.

"You just look very… comfortable."

Kono frowned as she turned again. "I've been living here for four days, not to mention that this usually where we do team dinners and stuff."

Carla just smiled.

Kono rolled her eyes.

She walked past Carla and into the living room. Steve was sitting on the couch, doing the paper work that Danny had brought over. He looked up as soon as she entered, as if simply sensing her presence.

"What's up?" he asked.

"I was just wondering if the doctor said anything about exposing my wound to sun."

He frowned, confused. "No, but in general, you don't want to expose it for too long. Not more than a few hours."

"Oh, good! We're going to go sunbathe and I don't want to get a weird tan from the bandage."

He smiled and she returned it before turning around to Carla. "Come on. I'll need your help with my suit."

Carla put down her lemonade and followed Kono upstairs.

Steve tried not to think about the fact that in a few minutes, Kono would be coming down those stairs (_his _stairs) in some sort of swimsuit. And there was not a doubt in his mind that it would be a very skimpy bikini, probably in some enticingly vibrant color.

Was she trying to torture him?

And an idea popped into his head.

He grinned.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

**OHHHHH! Hope you liked it! It was a fun one to write, at least. **

**Please go petition! **

**Please tell me if you would like a one shot about either: the Lori-less version or the more-Kono-less-Lori version of the last episode. **

**(Note that I might do them anyway. If I get FIVE reviews for either of them, I'll do it!) **

**SO GO REVIEW! This is the best way to encourage us authors to keep going! And we love you for the support! **


	15. Chapter 15

**Hello my loves! Sorry this took a while. Got caught up in some new stuff. I will post the alternate endings this weekend (btw, I got a HUGE turn out about that. I love hearing from all of you! It makes me feel so special! *****grins like a nerd… while sitting in a busy café. People are staring…**** Awkward…*)**

**So the most recent episode was… okay. Other than being really horrifying (I mean where do they get these ideas for crazy psychopaths?), it had kind of the original teamwork, which was awesome. However, this was the second kidnapping of kids. I think that instead of Steve looking at Lori, it should have been him looking at Kono. Obviously. I mean, really, how is it that I think of these things and the writers don't? So I'm going to add that as the third chapter to my series of alternate ending one-shots. Ch1: ****Kiʻilua (2.10) with less-Lori; Ch2: Kiʻilua (2.10) with no Lori at all; Ch3: Pahele (2.11) with a Kono/Steve moment (not Lori). Sound good? **

**Also, I'm listening to Christmas music right now. I have an obsession with it, so it's not really surprising, but I am still **_**so**_** excited. I love winter and decorating and the cold and Christmas and family and traveling and the occasional snow (Seattle has issues with snow – it's hilarious) and pretty much everything involving this season. **

**Which is a really long way of saying: **

**WELCOME TO THE HOLIDAY SEASON AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS! **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Carla followed Kono up the stairs to the guest bedroom and shut the door as Kono went over to the duffle. She grabbed two bikinis, her red one and the new purple one. Carla raised an eyebrow at the purple one.

"Does that even cover anything at all?"

Kono grinned. "It fits perfect actually. I'm small; it works. And just to prove it, I'll wear it."

She turned around to take off her shorts and Steve's dress shirt. She missed Carla's smile. Even if Kono didn't know it, Carla could see that she was trying to impress Steve.

Kono slipped on the bottoms and then took her bra off carefully. She slipped the neck of the halter-top bikini over her head and then Carla stepped behind her and helped her tie the back. When she turned around, Carla's eyebrows shot into her hairline. Kono laughed at her expression.

"What?" she chuckled.

"You weren't lying when you said it fit perfectly."

The dark lavender bikini was obviously designed for people as tiny as Kono in mind, which was rare. It was definitely why Kono had bought it. _There's no way in hell the girl can wear that surfing, _Carla thought. _It would result in a major clothing malfunction. Perfect for sunbathing, though. _

Carla saw one of Steve's white dress shirts hanging in the open closet. She walked over and grabbed it, then held it out to Kono.

She took it, confused. "What's this for?"

"Do you really want to walk down there, in front of him, wearing just that?"

Kono looked at her and then slipped on the shirt. She left it open though and that was exactly what Carla wanted_. Nothing hotter than that, _she thought.

"Come on, let's go," Kono said. In the hall, she opened a closet and grabbed two beach towels, passing one to Carla. They walked downstairs, past Steve in the living room, took their lemonades and then went out to the lanai.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

_Oh, you have got to be kidding me. _

Kono walked down the stairs, moving past the opening of the living room like he wasn't even there. He felt his eyebrows go up and his jaw might have dropped.

She was wearing his white shirt over the tiniest purple bikini he had ever seen.

He could see it through the shirt (_his_ shirt, which didn't help) and he could see her long, long tan legs from under the shirt. It hit her right at the top of the thigh. The bikini was evidently three rather small pieces of fabric connected by very thin string.

_Oh, fuck. _

Carla walked behind her and glanced over at him. He tried to compose his face, but she smirked at him.

_Great. Another person on the "They're In Love" team. _

They walked out onto the lanai. He covertly slid over so that he could see through the glass doors.

Was it his imagination or did Kono's hips sway more than usual?

They moved some of the furniture and spread their towels out. He could see Carla taking off her shirt and shorts to also reveal a bikini. Many men might have found her body more attractive than Kono's ultra-slim physique but for some reason his eyes didn't even flicker to her.

He watched as Kono laughed at something Carla had said, her face during down to hide her smile. He could see her shaking her head as she slid the dress shirt slowly off her shoulders. He watched it slide down her arms and she pulled it gently off. He caught the slight tightening of her features as she had to stretch her left arm. She was tough, he had to give her that. Carla probably didn't even notice.

She took off the shirt and his breath caught as he realized just how revealing the bikini was. It was actually tiny. Like, holy shit miniature. He didn't think he'd ever seen this much of her skin.

He would have to savor the moment. She slipped on her sunglasses and kneeled on the towel, lying down on her stomach carefully.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono walked confidently down the stairs and purposely ignored Steve. She really didn't need to have any more embarrassing moments to fuel Carla's fire about them.

But just in case he was watching, she made sure he would not forget this.

She swung her hips, emboldened by the fact that she knew she had a good body and that this bikini looked awesome on her. She really wanted to turn around and look at his face. _That would just make it worse, Kono, _her sensible side told her.

_It can get worse? _her rebellious, realistic side answered.

Carla stood across from her, taking off her shorts and t-shirt. She was smiling.

"What?" Kono asked.

"You really should have seen his face," Carla laughed back. "It was priceless. He is so in love with you."

Kono laughed and turned her head down, hiding her eyes. "Carla, you have seen what I'm wearing right? Any man's eyes would fall out of his head."

"But he's not any man."

Kono looked up at her, purposely sliding the shirt off as sexily as possible, just in case he was watching. "You're incorrigible, you know that?" she said, contradicting her movements. She knew it too, but she didn't care. She would deny that she had feelings for Steve until the day she died if she had to. She would even deny to herself that she had them.

She slipped on her sunglasses and lay down on her stomach, careful to not hurt her shoulder.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve finished up the after action report quickly and went upstairs to change into his swim trunks. He grabbed a towel and both his gun and his back up. Then he went downstairs and walked outside to where the girls were lying, their heads turned toward each other and catching up on each other's lives. They heard him and looked up.

Kono's eyes skimmed over his ripped abs. She was thankful for the sunglasses.

She smiled at him and his heart did a little flip.

"Hey, I'm gonna go for my swim."

"Okay," she said.

He leaned down to set the back up gun next to her. "In case anything happens…"

Her smile faded slightly, changing to one of thankfulness for him caring. She didn't need to say anything.

"What about you?" she asked.

He produced his own gun from under his towel.

"Of course," she said with a smile.

He laughed and moved away. As he walked next to her body his eyes noticed two things: first, she had untied the back of the halter, so she didn't get the tan line, and second there was a tiny tattoo at the base of her spine that this exceptionally revealing bikini showed.

It was a wave with a gun in the middle of it.

_So Kono and so hot_, he thought.

"Nice tat," he said quietly as he walked calmly away.

She went stiff as a board and stared straight ahead. Carla instantly started giggling, letting it grow into all out laughter once Steve was out of earshot. Kono was horrified. Her personal tattoo, meant to be seen only by her very closest lovers, had been spotted and commented on by her boss.

_Right. Like he's just a boss. _

The worst part was the way her heart was pounding, the way her mind was straying, the way she suddenly felt warm all over.

Lord, the effect he had on her.

She was mortified.

"Shut up!" she muttered to Carla, flopping back down. She was so embarrassed. "Uhh, I can't believe that just happened."

"Oh, honey! That totally just happened!" Carla laughed. "He was totally checking you out!"

Kono looked over at her. "Seriously? I have just been completely mortified! He's my boss! He's not supposed to see my personal tattoo! It's totally unprofessional!"

Carla just laughed more. "Honey, he has like twenty tattoos and since when do you care about professional?"

"Since it's a tattoo on my ASS!"

"Hey, at least you got James's name removed from under it," Carla said, taking a sip from her lemonade.

Kono froze.

Of course Carla would bring that up.

Carla looked over at her and saw the horrified, scared look on Kono's face. "Kono? What's wrong?"

Kono broke out of her trance to look over at her best friend, blinking quickly. Her mouth opened but no words came out.

"Kono? What is it? Did something happen?"

Did something happen? What was she supposed to saw to that? _Yeah something happened, he showed up on Steve's doorstep with a gun and knocked his sister out before trying to rape me. _ How the hell was she supposed to tell Carla that?

"Carla, I… I really need you to not freak out on me. I can't handle that."

_God, whatever had happened must have been bad to get Kono acting like this, _Carla thought. She nodded, eyes wide with worry.

Kono swallowed. It was now or never. And never wasn't really an option.

"James showed up yesterday." _Wow, was it just yesterday? _she thought.

Carla sucked in a breath, surprised. Kono shook her head to keep her from talking.

"Just listen and let me get this out. Mary met him at the door and he… he knocked her out." Carla gasped. "He then came for me and he… God, Carla, if Mary hadn't called Steve and he hadn't shown up when he did… he would have raped me." She was crying now. Carla was one of the few people who understood how much James and Kono had once meant to each other.

"Oh Kono," Carla whispered, scooting over to wrap an arm around Kono's shoulders. She held Kono as she cried for a moment.

Finally Kono pulled back. "I just couldn't believe it. I mean, can you imagine James doing that?"

"Not the James I knew. Not the one you loved."

Kono nodded. "He said it was my fault his life turned out the way it did."

"What does that mean?"

"Well I don't really know but he was involved in the case that I was shot on, a human trafficking case. So I don't think it's turned out well."

"Well, it's not your fault. Don't let yourself believe that."

"I don't. Actually, I feel lucky that I never married him right now. What would he have turned out like?"

"I don't know," Carla said. "There's no way _to_ know."

Kono nodded. "I know."

Carla leaned away. "You're okay though, right?"

Kono shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. I had a panic attack last night."

"What happened?" Carla, said worried.

Kono blushed, looking down, knowing exactly how Carla would take this. "I, uh… I went to Steve and slept with him for the rest of the night." She glanced over at Carla.

Carla's eyebrow was raised and she was smirking.

"Oh, would you not look at me like that? We didn't do anything."

"But you thought about it."

"I was having a panic attack, Carla. I wasn't thinking about anything except getting to somewhere safe."

"And that happened to be Steve."

"Yeah."

"Can you actually tell me you didn't think about it in the morning?"

Kono blushed.

Carla grinned. "You're totally in love with him."

"I am not!" she said forcefully.

Carla laughed. "Yeah right. Look at him and then tell me you don't think he's the hottest thing on the face of the planet."

"I've never denied that he's hot."

"Yeah, but your face will give you away."

Kono grinned. "Okay, but only if you look too."

"Fine."

They both rolled over and sat up part way to look down to the water.

"Holy fucking shit."

Kono just smiled at Carla's words and looked over at her. Her mouth was hanging open and she was staring at Steve.

Kono looked back down at him. For some reason the second time seeing him work out was even better than the first. Maybe it was because she knew that she had totally trapped Carla in that one. Maybe it was because Steve looked up at them and grinned wickedly.

It was pretty obvious that he had planned this.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve looked up occasionally as he started his work out, hoping his plan worked and they looked down. He wanted to see Kono's when she saw him working out. Finally, a few minutes later he looked up to see the girls looking at him. Carla's jaw was hanging open, obviously surprised to see his over-the-top workout. She was definitely checking him out.

But the best part was Kono's laugh at Carla and then appreciative smirk at him.

Maybe she did like him.

He smiled up at her and she blushed.

"Oh shit," Carla said when he looked at them, abruptly laying down and turning back over. Kono laughed and joined her. "Seriously, honey, how can you not be in love with that?" Carla asked. "I mean, he has the most amazing body and that smile… God, how can you not just melt?"

"I can't because he's my boss and I don't see him that way anyway."

"Okay fine, you can have fun over there denying your feelings."

Kono laughed. _Oh, Carla, you have no idea… _


	16. Chapter 16

Steve came up the beach after his work out to find Carla and Kono lying on their backs. They both had their sunglasses on and were now silent, just enjoying each other's company. He wished for a moment that he had a best friend like that. But he reminded himself that he had an awesome ohana and they were all his best friends like that.

Carla raised her head as he came up the lanai. He smiled at her knowingly and she swallowed. He laughed lightly.

"Steve, she's not available," Kono said dryly. Her eyes were still closed and she hadn't even moved at all. A small smile graced her lips.

He laughed again, letting his eyes scan her body. It escaped him why she would ever think that he would be interested in anyone other than her. Carla smirked to herself. "Apparently I can't sneak up on you anymore," he joked.

"You weren't even trying."

"So you still want lessons?"

"Sure."

"Okay." He looked up at Carla. "You should stay for dinner."

Carla smiled. "I can't." Kono finally opened her eyes to look at her best friend. "Mike has been hassling me to go out to dinner. He thinks we don't do enough dinners together."

Kono smiled. "Well maybe you guys can come over another night. We won't be doing anything."

Carla glanced from her to Steve, a smirk on her face. "Kono, I think you've moved in," she joked.

"Well, we're not!" she said indignantly. Then her eyes wrinkled worriedly and she turned to look at Steve. "Are we Steve?"

He smiled adoringly at her. "No, I don't think so."

"Good." She lay back and closed her eyes again. "Steve, move. You're dripping on me."

He laughed and smiled to Carla before he went inside.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Carla left while Steve was in the shower and when he came downstairs he found Kono in front of the refrigerator, wearing his shirt over the tiny bikini. He swallowed tightly and then walked down towards her. Without turning, she spoke up.

"Why don't you have any eggs?"

He looked at her back in confusion. "What?"

She turned around. "You don't have any eggs."

"I don't?"

"No."

"Oh." He paused. She raised her eyebrows. "I guess I need to go to the grocery store."

She grinned. "Can we go?"

"What, now?"

"Yeah!"

He stared at her. She looked like a little kid in a candy store. "Oh-kay."

"Yes!" she squealed, doing a cute little pirouette as she swung around to shut the refrigerator door. "I'll go change."

She ran upstairs and quickly threw on a pair of shorts, buttoned up the shirt and tucked it inside the top of the shorts. She ran back downstairs and skidded to a stop in front of the kitchen.

"Come on!"

Steve turned around from the sink where he was drinking a glass of water. She watched as he froze slightly when he saw her and then forcefully swallowed his water. He turned around again and dumped out the rest of the glass, placing it in the sink. Finally he turned back.

"You're wearing that?" he asked after a second.

"Yeah."

He stared at her.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing. Just maybe a little… risqué?"

She frowned at him and looked down at herself critically. "Risqué? Why? I think I look like I just came off a beach."

"You're wearing my shirt."

"Yeah. I've been wearing them for days."

He looked at her for a moment.

"Oh-kay then," he said, accepting her choice. "Let's go."

"Finally!" she gasped.

He looked back at her as he picked up the keys from the table by the door. "What's gotten into you?"

She shrugged and winced slightly. He tried to ignore that, but his brow furrowed worriedly for a second. "I don't know. I'm just ready to get out of the house for a while."

He shrugged, leading the way to the truck. She happily bounced into the passenger seat. "I guess I can understand that. Just be happy you're not stuck in bed."

She smiled to him in response and tried not let her mind drift to the various reasons she could be stuck in bed.

Most of them were with him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

By the time they got home with several huge bags of groceries, Kono was pretty exhausted. It worried Steve that she was still so affected by the concussion but he reminded himself that it had been less than a week since she was shot.

"Go upstairs and take a nap. I'll work on dinner and call you when it's done," he told her.

"I don't want to go sleep right now. I'll just watch TV and rest."

In reality, she was kind of afraid of the images her mind might create tonight.

He shrugged grabbing an armload of groceries. "Suit yourself. Would you open the door?" he asked, holding out the keys.

"Yeah." She took them as he grabbed more groceries and walked behind her. She opened the door and stepped inside, holding it for him.

He walked past her and into the kitchen, setting the huge bags of groceries on the bar. It felt as if they had literally bought everything in the store. He turned back toward her. She was still standing by the door, watching him, a content look on her face.

It was almost domestic.

He walked back towards her, coming to a stop right in front of her. He held out his hand, looking down into her eyes only a few inches away. Her breath caught lightly.

"I'll grab the rest of the groceries and lock up." He grabbed her hand as she reached out to drop the keys in his. "You sit, rest, watch TV," he finished his thumb stroking the back of her hand.

She gasped slightly at the unexpected contact. He was so close, right there…

"Promise me?" he said quietly, almost seductively. Her eyes flickered down to his lips for a moment.

"Promise," she managed to whisper back.

"Good," he said more loudly, stepping back a little and pulling the keys out of their connected hands. "I'll be right back." She nodded as he turned away to walk back outside.

The breath she didn't know she had been holding left her all at once. She realized that she had been expecting, waiting for him to kiss her.

And she was disappointed he hadn't.

_Shit. _

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

They had a quiet dinner of rare steaks and salad in front of the TV. They watched a crime show, making fun of all the incorrect things. It was nice and they went to bed early. Kono went up first as Steve washed the dishes. By the time he was upstairs she was already curled into bed.

He knocked lightly on her door, interrupting her reading.

"Yeah?" she called quietly.

He poked his head inside. His heart tightened when he saw her, sitting up in bed and reading. She was wearing, _oh dear god_, real honest-to-god lingerie. He tried to quell the thoughts that immediately ensued and any physical reaction that might occur. It was a solid white bra-like top with a plunging neckline. At the center it had a bowtie and the bottom part was flowing, see-through white chiffon.

It was obvious why she had chosen it: it tied in the front.

"Just saying goodnight," he said, managing not to pause for too long.

"Oh, yeah, goodnight," she said, slightly surprised. Inside, she was grinning at his reaction to her sleepwear.

He smiled and was about to leave when she called his name softly.

"Yeah?" he asked, turning back around.

She looked at him for a moment. "What did you think of Carla?"

He was surprised. "Oh, she seemed fun. Sweet. Kinda like Mary but more hyper."

Kono grinned. "That's exactly how I described Mary to her."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

He leaned against the doorframe, watching her. Her smile faded after a second and he frowned.

"What's wrong, Kono?"

She looked up at him quickly. "Nothing."

"Doesn't sound like nothing. It sounds like there's something you want to tell me."

She looked away from him. "Steve…" She hesitated and he grew increasingly worried. "I really want you to like Carla… just… not _too _much."

His eyebrows shot up. Was that jealousy? God he hoped so. "Kono, no… I don't like her like that at all. Trust me she's not my type." _You are._

She sighed, obviously relieved. "Oh, good. I was kinda worried there. She's seeing this awesome guy, Mike, he's a doctor at the hospital where she's a nurse and I really want things to work out for them, they're perfect together…"

"Kono, you're rambling," he said, amused.

Her head shot up to look at him. "Right. Sorry."

"No problem. It was kinda cute."

She blushed and looked down again.

"I didn't really get to know her today but I could tell that you two are very close."

She smiled, looking up again. "Yeah we are. She lived across the street and I would always escape to her house when things got rough."

His brow furrowed. "When things got rough?"

Her face fell. She looked at him like a deer in the headlights, scared and unsure of what to do. The horror she was feeling was written plainly in her eyes.

"Sorry, I don't mean to pry…" he said, worried he was pushing too hard.

"Uhh… no, it-it's fine, I just uhh… didn't mean to say that…" she stammered.

"It's okay, Kono. You don't have to tell me everything. But I'm here if you want to." He smiled warmly at her and her expression relaxed into a small smile.

"Okay… thanks, Steve."

"No problem. Goodnight." He moved away from the doorframe and reached for the handle.

"Night," she said quietly, the smile still on her face.

He smiled back and pulled the door to. In the middle of the hallway, he frowned.

He had more questions than answers now.


	17. Chapter 17

**So here's a conundrum. It's New Year's Day. It's January 1****st****, 2012. It's exciting. This is looking to be a good year. But as I sit here in the coffeeshop across from the park near my house, I could swear that it is spring. That we've already missed this exciting, introspective day. This is because Seattle has insane weather. It's warm and sunny (which in itself is totally un-Seattle like) and the birds are twittering. **

**I feel like I've missed the holiday. **

**So if anyone would like to tell me about their more wintery holidays, I would appreciate it. **

**Hope everyone had good holidays!**

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

_He was on top, hard against her thigh. His face was contorted in a sickly exuberant grin. His hands were groping, his eyes leering, his lips roaming… She struggled, she fought but he was stronger, he was pushing, he was hurting her, gripping her body tightly… She screamed but no sound came out, she thrashed but he didn't notice, she tried, she cried… _

_He ripped her clothes of violently, he touched her harshly, he kissed her painfully… She was naked and he was too… NO! She would not let him take away her dignity, her free will, she WOULD NOT, she screamed and thrashed… _

"NO!" she cried out, jolting awake. She was drenched in a cold sweat, the sheets a twisted mess around her legs, her chest heaving and her eyes wild. _Not again, not forever, _she thought as she struggled jerkily out of bed.

God, she could still feel him, could still see that face and she felt the tears prick her eyes and begin to run down her cheeks. How the hell could one little incident, one little thing from her past, mess her up so badly?

She knew what would help, she knew what she needed.

She fought to make her legs move towards the door and pulled it open, moving down the hall with one hand against the wall to keep her upright. Her breaths came in ragged, harsh gasps that burned her throat and sounded foreign to her ears.

Her hand hit the door at the end of the hall and ran down to the knob. She struggled to twist it, her hands shaking, but finally it opened and she shut it behind her. She moved quickly to the bed where she saw him raise his head and look at her.

He didn't say anything.

He didn't think he could.

She looked like an angel coming toward him, dressed in flowing, translucent white. She seemed to glow in the moonlight that streamed through the window.

Except he was pretty sure that angels weren't supposed to be so hot.

Like, whoa, fucking _damn_ hot.

The chiffon fluttered around her body, hitting her at mid thigh, and he could see her light pink boy shorts through it. The slit up the middle parted sometimes and he could see her toned, smooth stomach. The white stood out against her olive skin and dark hair.

_Jesus. _

To keep the blood from rushing to points south, he moved his eyes up to her face.

Tears were rolling down her cheeks, her eyes were wild with fear, her hair was mussed from struggling. She looked like a mess (_a hot mess, _he tried NOT to think). She was gasping for air, desperate.

So he did the only thing he could.

He pushed the blankets down on the bed and opened his arms for her to climb in.

She slid into the bed and he wrapped his arms around her. Her small frame shook with silent sobs and she hung onto his arms. He rubbed small circles into her back, whispering in her ear that everything was okay, he was right there, he had her, he was never letting her go.

She believed him.

Her sobs became softer until her breathing evened out and she fell asleep. He relaxed his arms around her and settled into the pillow more comfortably. He brushed the hair out of her face gently and looked down at her beautifully relaxed features, stained with tears.

He knew that eventually she would be okay, but for now he was comforted by having her in his arms. He watched her until his own eyes drifted shut again.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

His eyes opened as the early morning light streamed into the room. He felt the heavy warmth next to him and he moved his head to look at Kono lying next to him.

Her dark hair fanned out on the cream sheets and her face was turned towards him, her hand next to her nose. She had pushed the blanket down to her waist and the chiffon had parted in the middle. Her stomach was exposed, her other hand resting on it, and he realized for the first time that she had honest-to-god abs.

_Shit. _

It was morning. And this was _not_ helping. At all.

Having her wake up next to him like _this_ was probably an extremely bad idea. So he quickly rolled toward the edge of the bed, careful to not disturb her. He grabbed a pair of boxers and escaped into the connected master bathroom.

He turned the water on COLD.

His shower was not the normal three-minute navy shower. It took quite a bit longer than that to get his body to calm down.

Finally he got out of the shower, dried himself off and put on the clean boxers. As he walked back through the bedroom he was careful not to look over at the bed, only checking that she was still asleep. Then he left as quickly as possible.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Her eyes fluttered open, protesting the bright light in the bedroom. She stretched in the bed and looked around, realizing that she had once again ended up in Steve's bed. That was kind of awkward given her choice of sleepwear last night, she noted.

Speaking of Steve, she looked over at his side of the bed.

He was gone.

All the security, the comfort she had felt waking up here was gone. If Steve wasn't there it was just another bed. It was just another place where _he _could find her.

She began to hyperventilate. "Steve," she whispered.

No answer.

"Steve?" she called a little louder, her body frozen in the bed. She knew she had to do _something_. She couldn't just sit there and cry and panic. She knew that it wouldn't get better until she found him so there was no point in fighting it.

If she was going to be dependent on Steve, then she might as well accept it.

She took a deep breath, trying to control the tears rolling down her face (when had _that_ happened?) and got out of bed. She ran her had along the wall to steady herself as she walked down the hall. She reached the top of the stairs and started down.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve looked up from the pancake mix as he heard movement on the stairs.

_Oh fuck. _

First, she was still wearing that white thing that literally screamed sex.

Second, she looked like she was having another panic attack.

He was out of the kitchen faster than ever, striding quickly over to her. his arms wrapped quickly around her middle, pulling her tightly to him and her arms went around his neck. She let one sob out as she sighed, melting into him.

"Shh, it's okay, I've got you," he whispered in her ear, his hand rubbing her back.

She sighed brokenly, turning her face into his neck and tightening her arms around him. "I didn't know where you were," she whispered into his ear.

His heart swelled.

God, she was driving him crazy. In everything she said, everything she did there could be an underlying meaning. Everything she wore seemed to tease him, trying to make him want her. Did she like him?

Or the real question, did she like him as much as he liked her?

Yeah, it was kind of hard to deny at this point.

But on the other hand, she could just see him as a friend, a boss, who was caring for her (which was totally true). Maybe she just needed him to help her get better. Maybe she was just kicking back and settling to life in his house, which had been exactly what he wanted originally anyway.

So for now, he just answered her from his heart.

"Well, I guess I won't leave tomorrow."

She laughed, just slightly, like she couldn't help it. She pulled away, her hands coming down to wipe the tears off her face. He looked down at her, unable to stop himself from observing just how beautiful she was. He also couldn't help leaving one hand on her hip. He tried to ignore the fact that the only thing between him and her naked body was this thin chiffon and a pair of boy shorts.

Really, he tried.

"What makes you think that I'll be in your bed tomorrow?" she asked teasingly.

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? I think we would both get a better nights sleep if you just started sleeping in there."

She laughed. "Yeah probably." She sighed. "Okay."

There were footsteps on the stairs and they both looked up to see Mary Ann walk down stairs. Kono hadn't realized that she had come home, but Steve had heard her walk in close to midnight, just before Kono came into his room.

Mary looked at them sleepily. "Uhh, Get a room. I don't care what you guys do as long as I don't have to see it or hear it."

Steve glared at her and Kono's face scrunched up in disgust at her childish comment. "Oh, fuck off Mary." She pulled away from Steve and walked past Mary to go up to her bedroom and change into something more appropriate. She might as well move her stuff into Steve's room too.

"Just calling it like I see it," Mary said, shrugging. What, it was early in the morning and she was tired. She wasn't about to watch what she said.

Steve was still staring at her.

"What?" she asked.

"You need to get your head checked."

"Oh shut up. I know what I've seen." She walked by him into the kitchen. "Ooh, pancakes!"

Steve rolled his eyes.


	18. Chapter 18

**Okay, never mind. We're back to the world of rain and chilliness. **

**Loved the reviews! You guys are really sweet. Glad everyone seems to like Mary. **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

What should have been a relaxing morning, quickly degenerated into stress. Steve got a call from Chin during breakfast.

"McGarrett."

"_Hey Steve. I thought I should tell you that James is stable and awake._"

Steve glanced at Kono, sitting across from him at the bar and then turned away. He didn't miss the way her eyes crinkled with worry.

"Okay. What are you planning on doing?"

"_Uhh… aren't we gonna take him in and interrogate him?" _

"No, I think he should be fully recovered."

"_Why?" _

"I think it would be a problem if we beat him up in the hospital, don't you?"

He heard an intake of breath behind him and knew that Kono had caught onto the topic of conversation. He looked down at the floor, wanting nothing more than to just go hold her but knowing that he needed to finish the call first.

Chin chuckled. "_Yeah, that could be a problem. The hospital said he could be released tomorrow. The bullets didn't hit anything major, mostly superficial."_

"Well that is good. I guess we'll see you tomorrow."

"_We?" _

"I'm not leaving her alone," he said quietly. He heard a stool move on the floor and, sure enough, Kono appeared before him. He looked up at her.

"And I want to be there," she said equally quietly.

He turned the phone away from his mouth. "Kono, no."

"Yes," she said strongly.

"_What's going on?" _Chin asked.

"Hold on Chin, need to take care of something here," he said into the phone, before turning it into his shoulder. "No, Kono you are not going to be there. One of us will stay with you in the office while we interrogate him."

"No! I need to see it, Steve!" She looked like she might be about to cry and she sounded choked up. But Kono knew, knew what she needed to hear, to see, to feel. She knew it would help her get over this and it would explain to her why he did that.

She needed that.

Steve saw the determination in her eyes so he brought the phone up to his ear, his eyes never leaving hers. "We'll see you tomorrow, Chin. Call me when he's at headquarters."

"_Will do." _

Steve snapped the phone shut, still in a staring match with Kono. She was looking at him intently, her eyes half begging, half demanding.

Why had she never noticed that his eyes looked exactly like the color of the ocean?

It seemed prophetic that everything about him seemed to scream "home" to her and now his eyes looked like the place she was most comfortable.

_Okay, Kono, focus! We're noticing this fact and moving on, _she thought.

"Kono, you're not going to be there," he said firmly.

"Steve I need this," she said quietly.

It nearly broke his heart.

"I can't let you be there, Kono. It's too much, it's too dangerous."

"I don't need to be in the room. I just want to see his face when he explains it. I don't understand how he could do this Steve and I need to understand to be able to compartmentalize it and then move on. I don't know how to move on when I don't even understand what happened."

He looked at her. She was a constant surprise. She was young but she knew herself so well. She amazed him. She knew exactly what she needed.

How could he refuse her that?

"Okay, you stay in the observation room and I want you on speaker to my ear piece. You tell me when I'm pushing too hard, if you want me to stop, whatever, okay?" he implored, his eyes begging. Quietly he said, "I can't be the reason you get hurt."

Her heart melted. She stepped up to him, placing her hand on his cheek. He barely managed to keep his breathing calm.

"Okay," she whispered, stroking his cheek.

He smiled and her heart melted a little more.

Mary looked down at her empty plate with a smile and a shake of the head. Their denial of how much they liked each other was amusing at times like this. She silently slid off the stool and walked upstairs to get her bag and go out with friends that day.

Kono and Steve smirked at each other as Mary snuck out. It was funny that she somehow thought that she was quiet enough to not disturb the super SEAL and hyper-aware police officer.

Kono didn't remove her hand from Steve's cheek. "You know she thinks there's something going on with us?" she asked him.

He smirked even more. God, sometimes she just wanted to lean up and wipe that smug look off his face…

_Focus, Kono! _

Right, focusing. He was speaking.

"Oh, I've noticed. The pointed looks, the sneaking away… yeah, it's pretty obvious." He laughed.

She laughed with him, lowering her hand. He immediately missed its warmth.

"Yeah… I wonder what Danny and Chin think. Whatever, it doesn't matter anyway. It's us, not them." She smiled, walking back around the bar to her seat and unfinished food.

He turned, his eyes following her and smiled back, trying to ignore how his heart ached that she didn't feel the way he did. Although, as usual, that comment could have meant anything.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Around noon, Kono was sitting on the lanai with her book while Steve worked out (this was becoming something of a habit. A _really _good one, in her opinion). She was half-reading, half-watching him when her phone rang. It was Carla, which was unusual since they had seen each other yesterday.

"Hey," Kono answered. "What's up?"

"_Hey, I was wondering if that offer for dinner stands for tonight? Or are you busy?" _She sounded strangely calm, but Kono could hear the hint of excitement in her voice.

"No, not busy. We'd love to have you over. Will Mike come? I think he and Steve will get along really well."

"_Yeah, definitely. So maybe five o'clock?" _

"Yeah, that sounds perfect. We'll see you then."

"_Okay, hon, see ya."_

"Bye," Kono said with a smile as she hung up.

A calm, but clearly excited Carla was always an interesting combination.

She put her book and phone aside and stood. She walked down to the water front, watching as Steve did a couple laps across the property. She unabashedly smirked as he got out of the water, shook himself off, and then saw her.

He looked at her for a moment, taking in her appreciative expression.

"See something you like?" he asked with a smirk, walking over.

She shrugged and raised her eyebrows. "I'm a girl. Pretty sure anyone could appreciate this little routine of yours."

He laughed, looking self-conscious. It was kind of cute. "What's up?"

"Carla called. She and Mike are coming over for dinner."

"Oh awesome. Good thing I got extra steaks."

She smiled in agreement.

Each waited for the other to say something.

Somehow it wasn't awkward.

Well, it wasn't until her eyes started to wander. (Can you blame her? He was shirtless and dripping wet.) They fluttered to his lips, his shoulders, his chest and suddenly she realized how close they were standing. And she didn't miss the way his eyes were straying too.

_Okay, focus, focus, focus… Move away, Kono, MOVE AWAY._

She couldn't think of anything to say.

"Uhh…" _Oh thank god, _she thought as he started to talk. "I'm just… gonna finish up here and then we'll start on dinner?"

"Yeah perfect," she said. She tried not to notice how breathlessly nervous she sounded. She really needed to move but it seemed like her legs and decided to stop answering.

He smirked at her, trying not to laugh.

She narrowed her eyes at him, wondering why he was laughing at her.

"What?"

He reached out, gently grabbed her shoulders, and stepped towards her and for one short, stupid moment of near panic, she thought that he was going to kiss her.

Of course he wasn't.

And again, she was disappointed.

_Oh God Kono, get a grip on yourself! He doesn't see you that way at all! He's your boss too, you naughty, naughty girl! How dare you even consider that?_

He spun her around and she saw that his towel had been behind her.

"You're between me and my stuff," he whispered in her ear.

She took a sharp breath, his lips next to her ear sending shock waves through her body.

She didn't see how he hesitated before he pulled away, trying to resist the urge to pull her earlobe into his mouth and hear her gasp. He tried to resist the desire to drop his hands to her hips and pull her against him. He tried to resist the need to spin her around and kiss her and…

Okay, yeah, moving away now.

He settled for smirking at her as he walked past her to his towel.

She stared at him for a moment as he lay down and started to do sit ups. Then she shook her head with annoyance – at herself or him, she didn't know – and walked back up to the house. She dropped into her chair with a frustrated sigh and grabbed her book, sending one last look towards Steve before she forced herself to focus on her book, _not_ him.

_Fuck. _


	19. Chapter 19

**HOLY SHIT IT IS SNOWING. IN SEATTLE. AHHH! This might not seem significant to most people. Seattle is at a higher latitude than most places in the continental United States and a lot of them get huge amounts of snow (even ones at a lower elevation). But Seattle is in this weird little temperate bubble so we get very little snow. And it's usually less than an inch and melts in an hour. But this… this is real honest-to-god snow, people! Which is funny because no one knows how to deal with it. Schools are shut down, the university is closed, the buses are on snow routes and have chains on, the airport is operating at half power, people can't drive... Yeah. Totally awesome. **

**And wow guys that chap got an amazing reaction. But everyone was asking when things between Kono and Steve will pick up. I'm sorry to say not for a while. There's a lot of conflict that will happen between them, leading to a sort of different path to a relationship than you would expect. I promise that this is going somewhere. Don't give up on me here. **

**I leave you with a quote (and hope for more reviews!): **

"**The course of true love never did run smooth." – William Shakespeare**

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

The book was actually really good. Who knew?

She should focus on something other than Steve more often. Cause, you know, there are a lot of things out there that are just as interesting and fabulous as his body.

Steve walked up to the house, rubbing the towel across his head as he went. Kono was sitting in the one of the Adirondack chairs on the lanai, reading her book. He smiled. She seemed completely engrossed in it.

"Hey, I'm going to go shower and then we'll start dinner, 'kay?" he asked as he walked up to her, folding the towel over his arm.

She didn't answer.

He looked up at her. "Kono?"

"Mmh?" she murmured, not looking up.

He frowned. She always paid attention when he was speaking. She always dropped her book to look at him. And she always smiled at him. It was one of the reasons he loved talking to her.

Damn. Must be one hell of a good book.

"Just said that I'm going to go shower and then we'll start dinner."

"Mh-kay," she muttered, calmly turning the page.

He looked at her for a second longer, brow furrowed in confusion. Then he shook his head and went inside.

Her lips twisted into an unconscious smirk.

Oh it was fun to tease him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve came down stairs after his shower and went in the kitchen. From the window he could see Kono intently reading her book.

This was getting weird.

A half hour later, he had made the marinade for the meat and put it in the fridge. He looked out the window as he washed his hands.

Kono was still reading. She flipped the page quickly, eyes never leaving the words.

He went to the sliding door and opened it, letting the afternoon heat wash over him. She didn't even notice him standing there.

"That must be one interesting book," he said.

Her head turned towards him slightly, but her eyes never left the page. "Hum, what?" she asked distractedly.

He laughed. "I said it must be an interesting book."

"Oh, oh yeah, it is," she mumbled, turning the page.

He laughed a little and went inside. It was only four o'clock and Carla and Mike wouldn't be there until five. He decided to check in with Danny and Chin.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono looked up as the light began to dim. It had to be close to five, so she closed her book and went in. She could hear Steve's voice in the other room. As she walked to the kitchen, she noticed that the dining table was already set. She set her glass in the sink and saw that it was ten minutes to five.

Walking into the living room, she saw Steve on the couch, talking to the computer screen.

"So we have fifteen suspicious people in the HPD? That seems ridiculous."

Danny's voice came over the speakers. _"Yeah, hopefully we can eliminate a few of them with a little more digging."_

"Good. The fewer people we talk to, the better."

Kono watched for a second and then whispered, "Steve!"

He looked up and saw her there. "One second, Danny. What's up?"

"Carla and Mike should be here in the next half hour. I'm going to go change."

"Okay. I'll finish up here," he said with a smile.

She smiled and nodded, then headed up stairs.

Steve turned back to Danny, who had a weird look in his eyes. "What?" Steve asked.

"_Nothing,"_ Danny shrugged.

Steve scoffed. "Oh please. The one time I actually want to know what you are thinking, you won't tell me?"

Danny glared at him. _"You know, just for that, I should not tell you."_

Steve chuckled. "Okay, I'm sorry. Really Danny, I'm curious. What is it?"

Danny sighed. _"You and Kono are having friends over for dinner?" _

"Yeah, her best friend Carla and her boyfriend."

Danny gave him a pitying look.

"What?" Steve asked.

Danny shook his head. _"You are so gone, my friend." _

"What? You're not making any sense, you know that right?"

"_Ahh…" _Danny said wistfully, acting strangely out of character._ "Love is _so _blind." _

"WHAT!" Steve exclaimed at the screen.

But it had gone black, the words _user offline _flashing across the screen.

"Danny?" Steve asked the computer stupidly. "Uhh, Danny you're such a child!"

"Steve?"

He looked up at Kono as she came down the stairs.

"Everything okay?" she asked, slightly worried.

_No. No, everything is definitely not okay. Not if you're wearing THAT. _

She wore a tight, pale lavender dress that complemented her skin. It clung to every curve and he fleetingly wondered if she was wearing underwear. It had tank top straps, a small cowl neck that fell into her cleavage, and ended around mid thigh.

"Yeah, everything's fine," he said, quickly looking back at the computer.

"Danny?" she asked as she walked into the kitchen.

"Yeah," he answered, putting away the computer.

"Don't worry you'll be back at work soon."

He walked into the kitchen and frowned at her. She was getting the makings for various drinks out of the cabinets. "What?" he asked.

She grinned as she turned around, carrying his gin and his rum over to the counter. "Oh, we're on to you two," she laughed.

He frowned.

"The separation is hurting your bromance, isn't it?" she asked, barely containing her laughter.

His eyebrows shot into his hairline.

He was speechless.

The wheels in his mind were turning but nothing coherent was coming out.

_What? _

She couldn't help laughing. She nearly fell over at his expression. She actually had to sit down at the bar. Her entire body hurt from laughing so hard.

He slowly caught on that she was joking.

He glared at her.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she gasped, still laughing.

He watched her with amusement.

"You guys do have a bit of a bromance thing going though," she said when she could breathe again. "I mean, you guys argue constantly but you're best friends. It's kinda cute."

Wait. She did not just call him cute.

Her face sobered as she realized what she had said.

He managed to smirk and glare at her at the same time. "Cute?"

"Uh, no, not, not cute, I didn't mean cute, I – "

He walked slowly over to her, so that he was standing right in front of her. Her mouth snapped shut as he got in her personal space.

"You know what's cute?"

She just stared at him, eyes wide.

"You when you get all flustered. It's kinda hot too."

Her jaw dropped.

He casually turned towards the counter, not moving away, even as his mind spun at twenty miles a second. He actually hadn't meant to say that. "And why has the majority of my liquor cabinet come out?"

She stared at him, her brain struggling to function.

After her long pause, he turned back to her, a curious expression on his face.

Her mouth snapped shut and she swallowed, blinking as she looked away from him and towards the counter.

"Uhh, Carla and I were bartenders when we lived together. She was getting her nursing degree and James had just left. I needed income and a reason to get out of the house and see people so she got me a job with her. When we all have dinner together, we try out new drinks." She finally looked up at him again.

He was looking down at her, something similar to awe on his face.

"What?" she asked.

He laughed softly and shook his head, glancing down. "You are just full of surprises." He smiled at her.

She smiled back as the doorbell rang.

"I'll grab that. You get all the rest of your alcohol." She heard him laugh as she went to the door.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

It turned out that Kono and Carla were right; Steve and Mike got along famously. Mike had been a Navy resident physician stationed at Pearl Harbor before he left the Navy and moved to the private hospital where he met Carla. His father and brother had been in the Navy also, so he and Steve had many things in common. They sat at the bar and talked as the girls laughed while inventing drinks for them to taste test.

As the sun set on the horizon during dinner, the dining room was filled with an evening light that caught on everything that shined. Something caught several times, but Steve couldn't figure out what it was.

Suddenly Kono's fork clattered to the plate. Steve quickly turned to see if she was alright and found her staring across the table in shock. She seemed to do multiple double takes and then reached across the table, palm up towards Carla.

"Hand. Now."

Carla placed her left hand in Kono's.

"No, the other one!"

Carla smiled, slowly removing her hand from Kono's, setting down her fork and wiping her hand on her lap. Her eyes never left Kono's, who was getting increasingly impatient. Finally she placed her right hand in Kono's. Kono stared into Carla's eyes for one more second and then glanced down at her hand.

Her breath caught as she saw the diamond set in a gold ring.

"Dear fucking God, this is the whole reason you wanted to come over tonight and you waited hours to tell me!"

Carla laughed. "You've been waiting years for him to finally ask me, what's another couple of hours?"

"Another couple of hours? Dear God, Carla I think my heart just died! I'm so fucking happy for you guys!" she almost yelled as she stood and walked around to hug Carla.

"You'll still be my maid of honor, right?" Carla asked as they pulled away.

"Of course! That's the deal, remember? I'm yours, you're mine."

Carla laughed. "We were ten when we decided that."

Kono smiled at her. "And nothing's changed."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Carla and Mike left late that evening after devouring the haupia cake that Carla had brought over, knowing it was Kono's favorite. As they left, Kono turned to Mike, a serious look on her face.

"Remember what I told you when you guys started dating? And when you moved in together?"

Mike's face sobered up as well and he nodded quickly.

"Well this is another one of those times."

"Okay. My answer is still the same," he said.

"Wait, what?" Carla asked, looking quickly between them. "What's going on here?"

Kono looked at her. "When you guys first started dating, I knew how serious you were. So I told him that if he hurt you, I'd hurt him." She shrugged like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I reminded him again when you moved in together."

"And I told her that if I ever hurt you, I'd let her hurt me."

Carla stared at him.

Kono smiled. "It was the right answer."

Carla visibly melted. "God I love you," she said as she leaned up to kiss Mike.

"Oh, ew ew," Kono whined, turning away. "I love you guys, but seriously? Not in my house."

They all laughed but Carla raised her eyebrow at Kono. Her eyes widened slightly as she realized what she had said. She quickly shook her head at Carla, who understood that she wanted to act like this never happened, at least in front of the guys. So Carla just smiled a little wider.

Finally Kono shut the door after waving them down the driveway. She turned around to find Steve already in the kitchen doing the dishes. She walked over and flopped down at the bar, content to watch him.

After a moment, he looked up at her. He smiled and then went back to the dishes.

"What?" she asked.

"You look happier than Carla," he teased.

"She's my best friend, my sister really. I've been waiting for them to get together for years now. Of course I'm happy."

"I know. It's sweet."

She smiled and then yawned.

"Go up to bed. I'll be up soon," he told her.

She nodded, exhausted from the emotional dinner. He watched her as she slid off the stool and went upstairs to his bedroom.

When he went up fifteen minutes later, she was already curled up in bed reading. She had gone back to wearing a t-shirt. He was grateful. He smiled at her before grabbing a t-shirt and going into the connected master bath. A few minutes later, he went back into the bedroom and slid in next to her. She looked over at him.

"Are you going to read?" she asked softly.

"I'm good with anything," he replied equally quietly.

"Fantastic," she sighed, reaching over to put her book down and turn off her light. "I'm falling asleep."

He laughed and turned his own light off as well. In the dark, they slid down next to each other. He closed his eyes and listened to her breathing, waiting for her to fall asleep. But she didn't.

After a few minutes of silence, she whispered in the dark. "Are you awake?"

"Umm," he moaned back sleepily. "What's up?"

She was silent for a minute. "I don't know. I'm just so happy for them, you know?"

"Yeah. They're perfect for each other."

"I know. They really deserve to be happy."

"Everyone deserves to be happy."

He waited for her response. All he got was a slight sniffle.

He opened his eyes and turned to look at her in the moonlight coming through the curtains. "That's what's bothering you, isn't it? You don't think you deserve it?"

No answer.

He rolled on his side to face her, his palm propping his head up to look down at her. Her face was turned away from him.

"Kono?" he asked quietly. "Kono look at me," he said more firmly.

Slowly her head turned towards him and he could see the glistening of unshed tears in her eyes.

"You listen to me, okay? You are an amazing young woman. You have your whole life ahead of you. You will find someone who thinks that you hung the moon. And one day you'll wake up and realize that you are so happy, it should be illegal."

The tears started rolling softly down her cheeks even as she smiled at him. He reached out, wiping them off with his thumb, and smiled back.

"Thanks Steve," she whispered.

He smiled and laid his head down. "Go to sleep babe," he whispered.

She closed her eyes with a smile and rolled over to him. She picked up his hand and slid under his arm. He smiled as she cuddled in next to him and whispered goodnight before she fell asleep.

Who would have guessed that the kick ass Kono Kalakaua was a cuddler?

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

**The dress idea is a combination of the black one she wore while undercover with IA in episode 2.03 and the one she wore to the season 2 premiere on the beach. In case y'all wanted to know. **

**Reviews are love! **


	20. Chapter 20

**Sorry sorry sorry for the break y'all! I was superduper busy and all that stuff. But I'm on break right now, so expect a lot of updates! Also, thanks to badhairdays for lending me FRED. **

**Another Shakespeare quote for everyone who is still bugging me about the speed (I love you guys, but seriously?): **

"**I am not bound to please thee with my answers."**

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He woke from his light slumber to a small noise near by. It wasn't Mary; he had woken when she came in an hour before. And there, there it was again, a little cry. He turned to look at Kono, who had rolled away from him in the night.

Her cheeks were stained with a trail of tears and her lips were pressed tightly together in fear. She was in the midst of another nightmare and this time he meant to stop it. He slid over next to her and shook her shoulder.

"Kono?" he whispered.

She whimpered and struggled away from him.

"Kono!" He shook her forcefully and she screamed, her arms flailing.

He grabbed her from behind, pulling her between his legs and pinning her arms to her sides with his arms wrapped around her. She woke and struggled against him, but he whispered in her ear until she calmed down. She sobbed quietly into his shoulder as he relaxed his arms around her.

"I could see his face," she mumbled breathlessly.

"Hmm?"

She turned more towards him and curled deeper into his chest. "I could see his face. It was distorted and strange, not like him at all. It happened last night too." She took a breath. "The thing is that I couldn't actually see his face when…"

"Yeah."

They were silent for a while as they settled back into the bed. Their breathing and heartbeats fell in sync. They slept again.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve resisted the urge to get out of bed when he woke earlier than Kono. First off, he knew that she would have another panic attack if he did and he didn't want that. Second, she was draped across his arm and he didn't want to wake her by moving.

He propped his head up and laid in bed for a while, his eyes closed. He just listened to her breathing and the sound of the waves. It was relaxing and he knew that he needed to cherish that feeling for as long as possible today.

They were going to the office to interrogate James.

Well, he was going to interrogate James. She was going to watch.

He felt her shift slightly on his arm. He didn't say anything or move at all. And yet…

"What are you thinking about?"

He quirked his eyebrow in her direction and took a breath before opening his eyes to look down at her. Her deep doe eyes looked up at him, her head resting near his elbow, her hand by her face. It was the sweetest thing he had ever seen.

"Oh, just what's going to happen today. And how I really don't want to get up and deal with it right now."

She looked down and fiddled with the sheet. Finally she sighed. "Well, we're going to have to deal with it eventually."

"Yeah. But we can lay here for a little longer, don't you think?" he said.

She smiled up at him and slid up so that her head was lying on his shoulder and her arm draped across his chest. She threw one leg between his and his arm wrapped around her back, pulling her closer.

"I think that sounds like a good idea," she sighed, closing her eyes again.

She knew this was probably a not a good idea. She didn't want to admit anything about how she felt about him; he was her boss for heaven's sake. She didn't know how he felt and she didn't want to send the wrong message if he was interested in her. Cause there was no way in hell she was ever going to go out with him.

Nuh-uh. No way.

Everyone would talk. They would say that she only keeps her job because she's screwing the boss. They would say that she and Steve couldn't do their jobs because of their feelings. It could break the team up.

So yeah. Never going to happen.

In fact, she wasn't even going to acknowledge the depth of her feelings.

All she knew was that he was a really good friend and that lying there with him felt really nice.

And that would be enough.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Eventually they did get out of bed. Kono took a shower while Steve made breakfast. Mary came down and ate with them. Kono and Mary did the dishes while Steve showered and dressed. When he was done, they left for the office.

The car ride was comfortably silent at first. But as they neared the office, the air grew thick with tension. Kono watched as Steve's hands tightened around the steering wheel, knuckles turning white as they clenched and unclenched.

Finally she couldn't take it anymore. She reached out and took one of his hands in hers on the wheel. She pulled it down between them and twined their fingers. Her thumb stroked over his hand.

"Relax. I can do this."

"Not what I'm worried about."

She looked at him. "What then?"

He shook his head, looking out the window in the other direction.

She grabbed his chin with her other hand and turned his head back to the road. "Eyes on the road. What's got you worked up then?"

He sighed. "I'm worried about what I'm going to do to him."

She took a sharp breathin surprise and turned to look back at the road. Her thumb stilled on his hand.

He looked over at her. "Kono?"

"Nothing. I just…" She swallowed. "Thanks."

"What?"

"Thank you for your absurd protective streak."

"I am not absurdly protective."

"Oh really!"

"Yes really!"

"Then why do you want to beat him up?"

"Because it makes me angry that he hurt you, not because I think you can't protect yourself."

She looked back at him. "Oh. Okay."

He smirked and looked at her. "I know you can kick ass, Kono. That has never concerned me. I just hate bastards who hurt my _ohana_."

"Right."

Steve pulled into the parking lot and stopped the car. He looked over at her. She was looking at their entwined hands. He tapped her hand softly and she looked up at him.

"Ready?"

She looked at him. "No. Are you?"

"Not at all."

They smiled at each other and got out of the car.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve held the door and let his hand fall to the small of her back as they walked into the office. They walked past the offices to where Chin stood with his back to them at the data table. He turned as he heard their footsteps.

If he noticed Steve's hand rather possessively placed on his baby cousin, he didn't say anything.

"Hey guys," he said. "Danny's escorting him to interrogation."

Kono stepped up to the table and ran her hand lovingly along the side. This was her realm most of the time and it was strangely comforting to be back by it. The guys didn't realize just how much she actually enjoyed the tech work. They also didn't know that she had named him FRED – Futuristic Ridiculously Extraneous Device – in a loving way, that is.

"You ready, cuz?" Chin asked.

She looked up and noticed that Steve had stepped into his office to get the files that Chin had complied for him. She looked back at Chin and nodded slightly.

"Yeah. I think so. I'll be fine. Steve will be listening and he won't go to far if he doesn't think I can take it."

Chin smiled. "He cares about you."

"I know."

"No Kono." He reached out and laid his hand on hers. "I don't think you know just how much he does."

She frowned at him. "Chin…"

"No, just listen. He likes you. A lot. And if you don't feel the same way… he'll understand. But don't lead him on. He doesn't deserve that."

Her eyebrows shot up. "Wait, you're worried about Steve in this situation?"

He shrugged. "I can see how deeply he loves you. I can't tell what you feel because everything has been so messed up. And because I'm not sure you would let yourself be with him even if you wanted to be."

_Damn. He knows me far too well,_ Kono thought, staring at her older, infinitely wiser cousin.

"Okay, you ready to go?" Steve asked, walking out of his office with the files. "Danny just texted me. He's ready to go."

"Ok," Kono said. "Let's go."

Steve nodded and walked towards the door. Kono almost wanted to approach him and grab his hand; she could see the way his shoulders had tightened while he had been in his office. But then she decided that maybe he needed the distance to keep himself in check. And also Chin was right there and might find it weird.

The three of them stepped into the observation room where Danny was standing in front of the window, watching James.

"Hey," he said.

Steve walked over to stand next to Danny. He looked into the eerie cement interrogation room. James sat on a chair with his wrists handcuffed to the chair. They could see the bandages around his bullet wounds and the way he hunched over slightly in pain. Not one of them felt the slightest hint of remorse.

Kono looked up at Steve. His jaw was set in a tight line, the anger and anxiety stretched across his face. His arms were crossed in front of his chest and she reached up to run her hand along the back of his arm.

He turned to look at her and she smiled softly. He sighed and looked down, uncrossing his arms. He reached for her hand where it had fallen to her side and squeezed gently.

"Ok, so here's how this is gonna work."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

James only started to talk when Steve exploded at him.

"Where's Kono?" James asked for the fiftieth time. Kono looked down in shame for the fiftieth time as well.

Steve had growled. Actually growled. Kono's head shot up from where she was examining the floor in surprise. Steve walked up to James and grabbed his hair, yanking him back so hard his chair fell over. He let out a surprised yelp and struggled on the ground, still connected to the chair. Steve kneeled and grabbed his neck in a strangle hold.

"If you think there is any way in hell you are going to get to talk to Kono, you are sorely mistaken," Steve said. Then he grabbed the back of the chair and violently sat it back up.

"Now would be a good time to start talking," Danny said from where he was leaning against the wall at the back of the room. He walked behind James and leaned over to whisper in his ear. "Cause when he gets really pissed… bad… messy… painful things tend to happen."

From the way Steve was glaring at him from across the room, James seemed to believe him.

"Ok. I'll talk," he said. "But you have to tell Kono what I say. I want her to know what happened. Why it's all her fault."

Kono couldn't help the small gasp that escaped from her lips.

Steve stalked over to stand in front of him, looking at the two-way mirror that he knew Kono was on the other side of.

"It's okay," she whispered into the microphone.

Steve nodded imperceptibly as he heard her through the bug in his ear. He turned toward James, his eyes cold as steel.

"I don't have to do anything. You, on the other hand, have to talk."

James swallowed but nodded. "When Kono left, –" No one bothered to correct him, because obviously in his mind she had left him by rejecting him. "I went home to Australia. I continued surfing and traveling for competitions. One of my friends on the circuit was doing drugs and he saw how depressed I was, so he offered me some. I accepted. Eventually I couldn't afford it anymore.

"The cartel approached me. They said that if I would do some scouting and smuggling for them, they would supply me with the drugs. It made sense and was easy. So I did it. I continued to travel with the team and for the company after I started doing more coaching, so I've always been able to supply them with information. I was coming to Hawaii for a fundraising event and they told me to extend my trip and look for a way to get into the special task force headquarters.

"I didn't know that Kono worked here. But when she walked out with a file at the end of my first day of surveillance, I took a close up of the file and saw that it was our case. So I followed her home and then went to call my boss in the cartel. He told me to retrieve the file the next day while she was at work. When I saw the picture in her house… I went crazy. It was all I could think about. So I went to find her after the cartel told me that they no longer needed me for this operation."

Kono felt the tears start running down her face during his confession. She mourned: for the boy she had known, for the depressed young man she could imagine, for the drug addicted cartel asset he had become. The whole story was wrong, it should never have happened. She couldn't help thinking that maybe if she had done something, followed him, apologized, tried to settle things properly with him…

She gasped as her tears came faster and Steve's head snapped up to the window, desperately searching, even though he couldn't see her.

"I'm okay," she said to him. "Really, I'm okay."

He relaxed as Danny started to talk.

"Wait, so Kono took the file home on Wednesday and Monday?"

"I took it from work to home and back everyday so I could update it."

Steve repeated what she said. "So you cased the office on Wednesday and the takedown was on Thursday?" he asked James.

"No, I cased on Tuesday and retrieved the file on Wednesday," James said, confused.

"But Kono would have seen it when she went home on Wednesday?" Danny said.

"I didn't go home on Wednesday. Danny and Chin did for a few hours but I worked late prepping for the takedown and crashed on my couch, like you," Kono told Steve.

"She didn't go home that night. We both worked late and crashed on our couches," Steve told Danny in return.

Danny rolled his eyes. "You are a bad influence on her Steven."

Steve replied with his one-sided smile and turned back to James. "Why did they want the file? We know that they have someone in HPD."

"You don't share all your intel with the HPD. The bosses wanted to know if you had linked the cartel to the trafficking ring and if they could get away clean. I gave them the file on Wednesday and they had found out about the takedown that morning. They left that night."

"You know who the bosses are?"

"Yes."

"Do you know where they've gone?"

"Yeah, Los Angeles. That's where the headquarters of the cartel are."

"Okay, we're going to hand you over to the FBI and you're going to give them all the information you have on the cartel in LA. They'll arrange a takedown of the whole cartel there. And they might give you a reduced sentence." Danny pulled out his phone and called for someone to come take James to the FBI.

Steve uncuffed James from the chair and made him stand, then recuffed his hands behind his back. He led him out the door, Danny following behind, explaining everything to the FBI over the phone.

As they approached the door to the observation room, it opened. Kono stood in the doorway, her cheeks stained with tears.

"I'm sorry," she whispered tearfully to James, who stared at her. "I'm so sorry."

Steve passed James to the officers who had come to take him to the FBI. Danny followed them to ensure that James got there safely.

As he walked out with James, Danny turned back. Steve stood, his arms wrapped tightly around Kono, who sobbed into his shirt, her hands fisting in the fabric. Steve pressed a soft kiss onto the top of Kono's head and whispered softly to her as she gasped for air.

"Let's go home, okay?"

Kono nodded as she tried to catch her breath.

Danny turned back with a sad smile and pretended that he hadn't seen them.


	21. Chapter 21

**Consensus is (with the weighted opinions of Diana and Martha S-J): shorter chapters. Sorry to everyone wanting one long one. I'll be posting really fast though, I promise! Loves to everyone! And thanks for all the wonderful reviews! **

**Specifically to whoever it is that called themselves "Reviewer of only the best fics": THANK YOU. So very, very much. That was one of the kindest reviews I have ever heard. I wish you had an account so that I could just chat with you! I would be interested to know exactly what you like so much about my writing so that I can keep doing it! Thank you. **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono curled up in the Adirondack chair, a mug of tea cupped in her hands. The morning was cold but the salty wind off the water was calming to her. She had slept poorly and Steve had had to wake her twice from her nightmare. He must have waited until she had fallen asleep in the cocoon of his body before he rolled out from under her and went back to sleep himself. So when she had woken at first light, she had slipped slightly from bed, careful not to disturb him.

Now she sat in the peaceful silence of the early morning, the soft sound of the gentle waves her only companion. She shivered in the cold air and enjoyed it.

Her mind was clear for the first time since the afternoon before.

When they had arrived home after James was sent off, Steve had taken her hand and led her up to his bedroom. She was numb from the onslaught of emotions the morning had produced, so she let him. He had pulled the blankets back and sat her on the edge of the bed. He knelt before her and gently took her ankle in his hand, untying her sneaker and gently sliding it off. He did the same with her other foot and then walked to his side of the bed. She had followed him with her eyes as he went to the closet and took off his combat boots.

He looked up at caught her blank stare. He had smiled sympathetically at her and walked over to his side of the bed.

"Come here," he had said, lying down.

She looked at him, her expressive eyes empty.

"You're exhausted and overwhelmed. You should rest."

She had looked down dejectedly and slid into the bed. She turned her back to him and curled into a ball, staring at the wall.

She had heard him sigh behind her and felt him slide over to her. He pressed his chest to her back, his arm snaking around her middle to pull her tightly to him. She didn't struggle but she didn't say anything.

"Let me be here Kono. Let me comfort you," he had whispered into her hair.

The only hint that she had started crying was the soft shaking of her body.

He had gently turned her over into his chest and held her tightly to his chest as she cried silently. She tucked her face into the crook of his neck, her hands balled in his shirt and tangled her legs with his under the covers. He let her attach herself to him and wished there was a way he could convince her that it wasn't her fault.

She had cried until she fell asleep.

He had still been there when she woke.

He opened his eyes and looked down at her as she had stretched against him. Her cheeks were tearstained and her eyes were red, but she had still been beautiful to him. He had smiled at her and rubbed her back softly.

"Hey, you hungry? We skipped lunch."

"Yeah, I guess. What time is it?"

He had turned to look at his alarm clock, never releasing her. "A little after four."

"How about we just have an early dinner?"

"Sure. I'll go find something. You good?" he had asked.

She had smiled up at him. "Yeah, I'm okay. I'll be down soon."

He had kissed the top of her head and began to work his way out of the bed. "Take your time."

She had smiled softly and lay back against the pillows for a minute, before getting up. She went into the bathroom and washed her face with cold water, throwing her hair up in a messy bun before going downstairs.

Steve had thrown together a simple spaghetti and they curled up on the couch in front of the TV for the night. Even then her mind had raced the whole time, thinking about what James had said. She couldn't seem to relax and let it go.

But in the ethereal early morning light, before anyone else was up, listening to the waves and feeling the cold salty breeze, she found some measure of peace.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve nearly panicked when Kono wasn't in bed. It was later than he normally got up, but not so late that she should be gone. He jumped up, pulled his gun off his bedside table, and crept downstairs. He stopped though, looking out through the sliding glass doors onto the lanai.

She sat on the beach by the water, soaking in the sun and listening to the waves. She was wearing his old navy t-shirt still; she had stolen it to sleep in. He saw a mug on the arm of one of the Adirondack chairs and knew that she must have gotten up with the sun while it was still cold out.

He didn't go out to her. She seemed to be at peace down there.

So he made pancakes and omelets for Mary's last morning.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Mary smelled pancakes.

She looked over at the clock and moaned angrily at her stupid fucking brother for making breakfast at fucking eight in the morning. She hadn't even gotten home until one! She snuggled deeper into her blankets, trying to ignore the delicious smells coming up from the kitchen.

But when the syrup came out of the microwave and it's deliciously sweet smell invaded her room, she was done for.

She walked down to the kitchen sleepily and glared at Steve.

"Think it's early enough for breakfast? Or should we have gotten up an hour ago?" she asked sarcastically.

He nodded to the window, where he could see Kono still sitting by the water. "She was up early."

Mary let the anger drop away. "What happened yesterday?"

Steve briefly explained James' story to Mary. He realized part way through that that might have been a bad idea.

Her eyes narrowed and her shoulders tensed angrily. And when he was done she turned and looked out at Kono. And then she exploded.

"That little piece of shit! How dare he blame his own fucked up life on her! It's not her fault at all! She knows that right? You told her that?"

"She's not quite ready for that yet, I think," he said. "I think she needs some time to just process what happened to him and mourn for all that he lost. She still cares about him on some level."

Mary glared at him. "You're probably right. That doesn't make it right, though! So you better tell her that it's not her fault eventually, okay?"

He smiled. "I promise Mer."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

"Take care of yourself, alright?" Mary asked Kono.

"I will." Kono went to hug Mary. "Come back and visit us soon."

"I'll try," Mary said. She turned to Steve. "And take care of him, will you?" she added as an afterthought to Kono.

"Okay," Kono laughed.

Steve glared. "I do not need to be taken care of!"

"Oh really?" Mary laughed, going to hug her big brother. "Take care of her too, okay?" she whispered in his ear. "And I recommend you snatch her up before someone else does."

He laughed. "Right. Take care, Mer. Text me when you land."

Kono and Steve waved as she boarded her flight back to Los Angeles.


	22. Chapter 22

**IMPORTANT: **

**I replaced the AN in Chapter 21, but it didn't email itself to me. If you also haven't read the real Ch. 21, go back and read it before this. Thanks! **

**Also, I just lost the first half of the next chapter. This might take longer than expected. I hate my computer and it's inability to recover documents! **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She couldn't sleep.

Well, she could, but it wasn't good sleep. She had the nightmare several times a night and Steve would have to wake her up. She would get up early to go sit by the water. She would cat nap in the afternoon to make up for it.

Steve watched helplessly as Kono got more and more sleep deprived. He would try to talk to her about what had happened, but she just changed the subject and her eyes begged him not to go there.

He knew it couldn't last much longer.

Three days after Mary left, he came down from his empty bed to find Kono sitting on the beach like always. He watched her for a moment. And for the first time since this routine started, she didn't look peaceful.

Her shoulders were shaking and when he opened the door, he could hear her sobs over the sound of the waves.

He quickly walked down to the water and sat next to her. She didn't turn to look at him, instead trying to control her tears. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his chest. She sobbed and he whispered to her that everything would be okay.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono didn't quite believe Steve when he told her it wasn't her fault. Wasn't it her fault that James had been depressed? So wasn't it her fault that he had turned to drugs? Wasn't it her fault that he had been in the cartel?

But the more he told her that, no, of course it wasn't her fault, she believed him.

If James had been depressed, he should have gone to get help. It was his choice to accept the drugs. It was his choice to work for the cartel instead of going to rehab to get help.

It wasn't her fault.

It wasn't her fault.

It wasn't her fault.

It was his own.

The nightmares started to get better.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

When Carla came over on Sunday, they started making lists of everything she and Mike wanted for the wedding.

They went over colors: of the flowers, of the tablecloths, of the bridesmaids dresses, of everything. They talked about styles of bridal gowns, trying to decide what which one they liked best. They talked about venues and looked at calendars.

The fact that Mike wasn't there wasn't important, apparently.

So Steve suggested that they invite Mike over for dinner.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve went back to work on Monday.

He left a gun with Kono and made her promise to be careful.

She was pretty sure that he was worried she would steal a surfboard. She had been complaining about how she wanted to get back out on the water for a couple of days. He knew it was only a matter of time before she over estimated her strength and hurt herself.

So when they went to the hospital on Wednesday to get her last few stitches removed and new instructions, Steve specifically asked if it would be safe to surf.

Maybe on Saturday, the doctor told them.

Steve had looked shocked.

That was not the answer he wanted.

"But she had a concussion!"

"It wasn't that bad a concussion. I wouldn't recommend too much exercise and if you get headaches in the next few days, you shouldn't try it, but I think a little wouldn't hurt anything."

Steve glared.

She laughed at him. "I promise I'll be careful and will only go out for a little while okay? And I'll wait until Sunday and do it with Carla."

He sighed in defeat but agreed.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Torture.

It was the only way to describe the heat wave. It rolled in on Friday and lasted until Sunday.

It wasn't even the heat that got to Steve. He had worn heavy combat uniforms in the deserts of the Middle East. He could handle heat. But there were two things that he couldn't stand about this particular heat wave.

The first was Danny.

"Steven, if you expect me to walk outside in 110 degree weather, you are clinically insane!"

Steve rolled his eyes at Danny's whining. He had only asked if they would like to go get lunch. They didn't have a case on Friday, so it wasn't like they were working in the heat. He was just afraid to step outside _at all_.

The second, and far more worrying, was Kono.

It wasn't that she couldn't handle the heat. She had grown up here. She knew to wake up early and spend the cooler morning outside. She knew to take a nap in the early afternoon, when it was the hottest. She knew to eat cool foods for dinner and to stay up late because it was cooler at night.

What worried him was when he got home on Friday, she was sitting around her bikini and his shirt.

He understood that it was cooler than _real_ clothes. But really? Did she have to wear it all the time? It was a swimsuit. People usually wear them _to go swimming_. But was she swimming? No, she was wandering around his house.

Friday night, he actually wasn't worried at the prospect of having her be sleeping next to him. At least then she would be wearing something that covered her entire torso, even if it was his shirt.

He lay in bed, one arm behind his head, holding his book in the other. He heard the door open and he raised the book to look at Kono under it.

Why?

Why did he have to be wrong again?

And why the hell did she have to sleep hot?

She was putting her hair up in a loose bun to keep it off her back and face as she walked towards the bed. It gave him a moment to close his mouth.

Cause really, she was only wearing a sports bra and boy shorts, for god's sake.

She slid into bed next to him and folded the sheet down to her waist, before she reached over for her book. He sneaked sidelong glances at her as she lay back, her book perched on her stomach.

He forgot that she had spidey senses.

"Stop staring at me."

"I wasn't staring," he protested.

"Yeah you were."

"No I wasn't."

"Sorry brah, but you were," she laughed, turning to look at him. "Why?"

"Why what?" he asked, purposely being difficult.

"Why were you staring?"

He looked at her and let his eyes flicker across her body. "That… is a stupid question."

She blushed. Hard. It was cute.

He smiled at her and rolled over to put his book down and turn off his light. She did the same and they went to sleep without another word.

When he woke up the next morning and found her draped across his chest, he had to sneak out of bed.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

On Sunday, Kono spent the entire morning trying to convince Steve to let her go _by herself _to the beach where she and Carla normally met. He only agreed once she pointed out that she was only staying with him voluntarily at this point and could leave any time.

It would have been so much easier if she had just agreed to stay there.

He spent the entire day worried that he would get a call from Carla to tell him that she had… what? Overdone it and had to sit down? He knew nothing was going to happen.

Didn't mean he couldn't freak out about it though.


	23. Chapter 23

**So I recommend playing "Cosmic Love" by Florence and the Machine. I also recommend searching "nikita and Michael finally kiss" on YouTube and watching that (because I totally stole from it – it's awesome and I wish the whole scene happened here). BUT DO THAT AFTER YOU READ. **(And then you should start watching Nikita. Because if it gets cancelled, I might die and then this story would never be finished. That would make you sad. Nikita will make you happy. So you should go watch it. And then you should like it on facebook and trend it on Fridays on twitter. Cause seriously if it is cancelled… my life will be over. * sobbing desperately *)

**I am already expecting a lot of reviews for this chapter, but just because I like to say it… please review! **

"**Love is the difficult realization that something other than oneself is real." – Iris Murdoch**

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

They fought.

For some reason, Steve had assumed that they would never fight. Maybe it was because they were so alike. Maybe he thought that there would never be any conflicts between. He was wrong.

The problem was that they were either complete opposites or _too _alike.

Kono was messy.

Steve was neat.

Both were stubborn.

"Ahh!" Steve cried out as he tripped over one of Kono's shoes. It was buried under a pile of soft looking clothes and he had misjudged the height of the pile in the dark. He hadn't wanted to wake Kono when he got up so early to go for his run and a swim before work.

"Steve?" came her groggy voice from the bed. "You okay?"

"Yes," he hissed, slightly angry with her. "Just tripped on your shoe."

"Oh sorry," she said, lying back in bed.

"It's okay, just… pick it up later?"

"Um hum…"

He rolled his eyes at her sleeping body.

The next day he tripped on her shoe – a different one! – in the living room. He was getting them fresh beers as they watched TV and as he rounded the couch, there it was, just waiting to be tripped on.

"Ahh! Kono!"

She looked over from the TV at him and looked surprisingly unfazed by the discovery of her shoe. "Oh sorry."

"Seriously, you need to pick your stuff up."

"Yeah, I will."

He stared at the back of her head for a second and then continued to the kitchen for the beers.

When he stumbled over her bag where she had dropped it next to a chair, he looked around to yell at her, but she wasn't there.

That was when he decided that it was pointless to try to reform her. He just set the bag on the bench by the front door.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

They went back to the doctor's on Wednesday. He gave her a clean bill of health. When they got home, she made an appointment for her psych evaluation on Monday. If she passed, she would be back on active duty.

She was more scared of psych evals than bullets.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Kono got Steve to take her to her apartment and get her car. She spent Thursday and Friday at her ransacked apartment. The cops had finally left and so she went to start cleaning, since she and Steve had decided that she would go home on Saturday. Somehow the cops had left it worse than James had. Apparently they had tried to put things back in place, but they had completely failed.

Kono was normally someone who lived in "controlled chaos". Chin always said that her apartment looked like a bomb went off in it.

Apparently Steve was rubbing off on her. He was the über-neat navy guy; he didn't like a "pile-system" or any system, actually, unless it involved filing and throwing things out. It was over-the-top organized and nothing like her.

However, she was making an effort to make her apartment as spotless as possible.

She was throwing stuff out for the first time in _years._

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve sat at the bar, looking into a half-empty glass of water. Kono was upstairs packing her bag and he tried not to be too depressed about that. He had always known that at some point she would leave his house and go back to her little apartment.

But in the past three weeks that she had been living with him, something long forgotten had been stirred up. He remembered when his big house had been filled with his parents, his sister and him. How it had never been quiet then. How someone had always been home when he got there. How they had family meals and outings. How they fought over all the little things, but always agreed on the big issues. How it had never been easy, but they had never wanted it any other way.

Kono had reminded him of that. He had liked coming home and finding her reading a book on the lanai, or surfing the Internet on the couch, or dancing around the kitchen with the radio blasting as she baked a batch of brownies because she wanted some chocolate. He had liked making dinner for them and then fighting over who should do the dishes. He liked the sense of companionship she had brought.

There. That was the word he had been looking for to describe this feeling. _Companionship._

That was something he would miss.

He turned as he heard her coming down the stairs. She was back to wearing her own clothes and he kind of missed seeing her in his dress shirts. Though he realized most people would argue that she looked better in her tight fitted shirt than in his way too big shirt.

She dropped her bag by the front door and turned to look at him. He stood between her and the kitchen, his shoulders drooping forward. His eyes revealed his need to say something to her and she cocked her head curiously at him, wondering what it was.

"I'm going to miss you," he said quietly.

"No –"

"Yeah I am." He paused and swallowed, but his eyes never left hers. "I know that I'll see you every day at work…" Was it shame that spread across his face as he glanced down?

"But it won't be the same."

She looked at him softly and her voice came out a whisper.

"We'll make it the same…"

She turned away with a small smile, not sure she could say anything else without crying. She didn't want to leave though and she moved slowly towards her bag. Behind her she heard a rustling of fabric and a few quick steps. His rough hand ran unexpectedly under her chin and her mouth opened to gasp as she spun and his hand slid to cradle her neck.

She never had the chance as his lips collided roughly with her own.

She felt nothing. Only him, pressed so intimately to her, more intimately than ever before. She felt nothing but his soft lips moving so desperately against hers. She felt nothing but his hand on her waist, in her hair. Her hands came up to his shoulders, wrapping lightly around his neck as her lips moved with his unconsciously. She'd be lying if she said that she had never thought about it, about this moment, about how he would feel, how he would taste, how he would touch her.

But her brain kicked back in and she pulled back a few inches, her eyes opening to look at him.

He didn't move when she did. He froze and opened his eyes to look down into hers. From the surprised expression on her face, he knew that everything he was feeling was revealed to her in his eyes. And he didn't care. He wanted her to see the desperate desire he had for her. But it wasn't just a carnal need; it was a hope for a future together.

He wanted her, whole and entire.

He loved her.

She stared into his deep, intensely blue eyes. She saw all his feelings for the first time and she believed in them. She knew that he loved her, truly, intensely, deeply. And she wanted that love.

She leaned in slightly and he tilted forward to meet her, their lips meeting softly in a kiss so different from the first that it made their heads spin. One of them sighed, but neither knew who it was. She leaned forward, her head tilting to deepen the kiss and molding herself to his body, her arms finally wrapping around him, touching him, running through his hair. As if all their nerve endings were on fire, this feeling overwhelmed their senses. His hand slid up under her shirt, his callused fingers running across her skin and he was real to her.

Reality. It was the knowledge that something other than her was real. It was powerful and it was intense and it was scaring the shit out of her.

She pulled back, her hands sliding to rest on his chest, and this time she didn't look up at him. She looked down with her eyes closed, swallowing hard, trying to drown this feeling inside herself. She didn't want to hurt him. She didn't want to do this, but she had to.

His arms were still looped around her and she felt him staring at the top of her head in confusion. Finally he settled for lightly rubbing her back and running his lips across her hair, gently kissing her forehead.

"Steve…"

He knew that tone. It was the "I'm really sorry, I don't really want to do this, but I'm going to anyway because I have to" tone. That was bad.

When she took a tiny step away from him, creating just the smallest amount of space between them, it was worse.

She finally looked up at him and sure enough, there was a glistening of tears in her eyes. He doubted that she even knew they were there. He kept his hands on her waist, hoping that she would change her mind. He could see the wavering, the faltering, the struggle in her eyes. She was trying to look so strong, to hold fast to her ground. She was trying to stop herself from falling off the cliff, but she was afraid she would loose her footing.

"We can't do this Steve. We can't risk everything on this. _I_ can't risk everything."

He nodded as her hand slid up his chest to stroke his cheek. He looked down, trying to respect her decision. "Everything will be the same," she whispered. "We will make it the same. We'll surf and we'll spar. We'll make dinner together and then fight over the dishes. We'll watch movies and eat ice cream right out of the tub. We'll make it the same. I don't want to lose this either."

She swallowed and pushed lightly against his cheek, making him raise his eyes to look at her. The sadness in them nearly took her breath away, but she pushed on, her voice a strangled sob.

"But we can't do this. I'm sorry."

Then she pulled away in a heartbeat and was out the door before he could say anything else.


	24. Chapter 24

**Whoa… over 200 reviews! So proud right now guys. Thank you so much for all your support through this story. **

**That said, no hate please. You know that eventually they will end up together (why else would I be here?). Stick with me through the twists and turns of their messed up, complicated relationship. It'll be worth it. You might even get some Kove happiness in the next chapter… ;) **

**And please no hating my Kono. I just don't think she would ever give into her feelings easily. **

**Sorry for the delay too! Real life… it's a problem. **

**PS. Battlestar Galactica shout out! A quote from Racetrack. **

**PSS. Dedicated to Diana (cm757) and Tiana-P. I freaking love you guys. You are AWESOME! **

**(I'm liking quotes right now… please read them!) **

"**There's a lot to be said for self-disillusionment when it comes to matters of the heart." – Diane Frolov, Andrew Schneider **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She would not cry.

She would not cry.

_She would not cry_.

Why was this even an issue? She had _nothing_ to cry about. They had kissed. So what? It wasn't like she had feelings for him. She believed (_she had to_) that she didn't have feelings for him.

Because _this_ could never happen.

It was simply too big a risk.

(_But relationships are risks. And they have rewards._)

This one was simply too big to justify.

He was her boss. A romantic relationship would be totally inappropriate. It could affect their work. She wasn't sure (it wasn't like she had ever researched this), but what if she was fired for it? Or reassigned? What would people say behind her back? And as far as she could tell, neither of them was good at relationships. What would happen when (_if_) they broke up? What if it compromised their credibility in the field? Or, even worse, what if someone got hurt because they were distracted by their feelings for each other?

Their hypothetical relationship was not worth that.

She wasn't really there as she drove home, her head occupied by all these questions. So when she got home, she grabbed her surfboard and rode her bike down to the beach. If there was anything that would take her mind off this and make her feel better, surfing was it.

She surfed until the sky started to darken and her body was worn out. She barely had enough energy to push her bike home. It was a feeling she hadn't had in weeks and she relished in it. When she got home, she grabbed the duffle bag from where she had dropped it in her living room and took it to her bedroom.

She stripped off all her wet clothes and pulled on a pair of boy shorts before she turned to the duffle. She unzipped it and plunged her hand down one side, searching for the soft cotton t-shirt she had tucked down there. Finally she found it and slipped it over her head. She turned to go make herself some dinner.

In the mirror on the back of her bedroom door, she looked at herself for a moment. She was drowning in the huge t-shirt and the writing was faded, but she liked it. She wrapped it around her body tighter, loving the way the soft fabric rubbed against her naked skin.

But most of all, she loved the way the Navy t-shirt still smelled faintly of him.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He didn't sleep well that night.

He missed having a comforting weight next to him. He missed falling asleep with their legs tangled together and his arm around her waist. He missed the way he could smell her shampoo when his nose brushed against her hair. He missed how she would walk downstairs in the morning wearing his shirt, the word _NAVY_ emblazoned across her chest somehow making her seem more _his_.

So he was a little possessive. Sue him.

But he did understand what she meant. In fact, he knew that she was right. But it couldn't stop him from feeling everything. He couldn't just remind himself of that and, _poof, _there go those pesky emotions. No, he knew that he would forever see her differently.

He just hoped that he wouldn't treat her differently.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She woke in the dark to the nightmare. She gasped for breath. It was the first time she had had one in a long time. She knew it was because Steve wasn't next to her this time. He wasn't there to protect her from James.

She buried her nose in the t-shirt and wrapped it around her body. With her eyes closed, she was just barely able to imagine that it was his arms wrapped around her.

She slept soundly after that.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

"He kissed me."

Carla actually choked on her drink. She coughed for a minute and wiped her mouth before turning to Kono.

"He what?" she squeaked.

She rolled her eyes. "He kissed me."

Carla stared at her. "And then…"

"What do you mean 'and then'? Then I left!"

Carla's eyes widened and she shook her head in horror. "You – You what? You left?" She reached out and lightly smacked the back of Kono's head. "What the hell is wrong with you? Why didn't you just fuck him?"

"Carla!"

"What? You know you want to!"

"I do not!"

"Yeah you do."

"No I don't."

"Yeah."

"No."

"Yes."

"No – "

Carla held her hand up. "Obviously, you're not going to admit it. So you didn't fuck him. At least tell me there was a little making out."

Kono made a slightly noncommittal sound and shrugged.

Carla grinned.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

It took three tries to walk through the door.

First off, she hated doctors offices, always had. It was something about the dull wall colors under even duller paintings. Was there some sort of interior designer that specialized in these places or something? They all looked alike and they were obviously supposed to calm the patients (or bore them to death).

How _this_ could ever calm someone was beyond her.

And, of course, the office was even worse because it was a psychologist's office. That made it down right creepy.

She sat nervously in one of the plushy chairs in the waiting room. Even the receptionist was overly sweet and reassuring. To keep herself busy, she pulled out her phone. She checked her email, her messages, every single thing she could think of, but still the doctor had not appeared. She looked at her text messages and briefly considered texting Steve.

_No, no, no Kono, what are you doing? _she thought.

But her fingers followed her subconscious and began to type a simple message.

She nearly dropped her phone as it vibrated in her hands and a new message appeared from Steve.

"_Good luck at the eval. You'll do fine._" it read.

She smiled.

Talk about mind reading.

"_Thanks. Going in now."_ she sent back quickly as a youngish female doctor walked in and called her name.

"Please take a seat, Officer Kalakaua," the doctor said, gesturing to a couch as they entered the office.

"Thank you," she murmured, sitting on one end as the doctor sat in an armchair across from her. She held a notebook and fountain pen and the silence of the room made the whole thing seem so formal. Kono felt like a lab rat in a cage, ready to be poked and prodded into revealing her secrets.

"I'm Doctor Michelle Stevens. Is it alright with you if we go by first names?"

"Sure."

"Wonderful. Let's start with why you're here in the first place. Tell me about the shooting."

"The shooting?" Out of everything they could talk about, she started with the shooting? Really?

"Yes. How did it make you feel?"

Kono stared at her for a moment and then blinked. "Well, I don't know."

Michelle tipped her head curiously.

"I mean, I have a dangerous job. Everyday, I go out there and there's a chance I might not come back. It's something you have to accept. You tell the people who matter that you love them and you make sure your affairs are settled because when you step into the office, you assume you're already dead."

Michelle blinked. "That's a very… macabre way to think about it."

Kono shrugged. "Maybe. But dead men don't get scared and freeze up under fire."

"I see," Michelle nodded, scratching something in her notebook. "So you aren't disturbed by the shooting? You aren't afraid to return to the field?"

"I have a great team," Kono smiled. "Why would I be afraid?"

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Steve twitched nervously, looking into Kono's office every few seconds. He wished that she was there, safe, that he could be with her in the eval, tell her everything was okay and hold her hand.

He should have been reassured when he received her text. He had hesitated to send it; they hadn't talked since she had left after they kissed. So the fact that she had answered him at all should have made him hopeful for their relationship.

But when she told him she was going into the eval right then, he became irrationally protective of her.

For once, he really wished there was a dead body to investigate.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

"You've been voluntarily staying with your boss, Commander McGarrett while you recovered, correct?" Doctor Michelle asked.

"Yes." Something about the way she stressed the word _voluntarily_ made Kono nervous.

"How has that been?"

"Good."

Michelle continued to look at her curiously. Kono had to refrain from rolling her eyes. _Shrinks, _she thought, _always so curious. _

"We get along well. We're really good friends." At least, she hoped they still were.

"So you would say that you have no disagreements or problems with Commander McGarrett?"

"Of course not."

"There's nothing about your relationship with Commander McGarrett that affects your ability to perform your professional duties?"

Kono looked at her. Wow this woman was dead on. She thought quickly; no one would ever notice the pause, but really her mind reviewed every moment she had ever had with Steve.

They fought all the time over little things outside of work. He always suspected and saw the worst in people; she never suspected anyone without reason and always saw the best. He wanted to be with her. She didn't want an inappropriate relationship.

Would that affect her job?

"Yes. There is nothing about our relationship that could affect my ability to do my job," she said firmly.

She believed it.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

Danny watched through the glass walls of his office as Steve's blood pressure rose steadily while Kono was away. At first he just twitched and fidgeted. He would glance up into her office occasionally, then more often, until finally, Danny could see an explosion coming.

Steve stopped. He didn't fidget or glace up. He stared at the report he was supposed to be working on for a minute. He was seeing it, but really thinking about something completely different.

Suddenly, he sat up straight and hurled the pen across the room. Danny flinched as the pen impacted loudly with the glass window and clattered to the floor. He looked up as Steve turned his chair around to stare out the window.

Danny got up to go stage an intervention.

The door swung silently shut behind him and he leaned back against its frame. He knew that his best friend and partner probably knew he was there and gave him a moment to initiate a conversation.

What? He still held out hope that the Neanderthal had social skills.

"You want to talk about it?" he finally asked quietly.

Steve didn't answer for a minute.

"There's nothing to say Danny."

Danny laughed softly. "I can see that," he said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

He could just imagine Steve's aneurism face. "Well what the hell do you want me to say, huh Danny?" he yelled, spinning the chair around and jumping to his feet.

"You want me to say that I love her, huh? Is that it?"

Admittedly, Danny had kinda hoped for that, but he had expected it to be like pulling teeth to get it out of Steve.

"You want me to say that I'm out of mind worried about her in that psych eval? You want me to say that all I want to do is hold her hand as she sits in that shrink's office and just be there for her? Huh, Danny?"

Danny didn't reply, just raised his eyebrows.

"Oh I see," Steve said, his anger and frustration driving him crazy. "I see how it is. You think I'm crazy for wanting to protect her. And you know what? MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT! Maybe I am crazy, cause I know SO FUCKING WELL how strong that woman is! Maybe it shows how in love I am with her or something, cause we both know that she'd shoot me if she knew how worried I was right now!"

Finally Danny laughed. Truly laughed, bending over, the unable-to-catch-his-breath kind of laughter. Because Steve was so right.

He heard someone else laughing too. Looking up, he realized that Steve had started laughing and was standing there, rubbing his face and laughing. When they finally caught their breath, Danny looked over at Steve, who had dropped back into his office chair.

"Feel better?" he asked.

"Yeah," Steve said. "Yeah."

"Good." Danny turned to walk out of his office, but turned back before he did.

"So you know, I don't think Kono would shoot you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Far as I can tell, she's in love with you too."

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

"Well, Kono, you seem to be handling everything okay. I think it's safe for you to go back into the field," Michelle said, capping her pen.

Kono blinked. "That's it?"

"Yes, I believe so. I think you should come in for a few more sessions, just to go over any lingering issues from your near assault –" Kono flinched "– but I think that you are fit for active duty."

"Okay. Well, thank you Michelle," Kono said sincerely. After all, this could have been far more painful. It seemed fitting to thank the doc for sparing her that.

Kono walked out of the therapist's office with a surprisingly light heart. Maybe she should reconsider her opinion of therapists.

She got in her car, holding the reinstatement notice in her lap. At each red light, she found herself touching it, or looking at it. It was a strange sensation, to feel so happy about returning to normal. But she knew just how much her work meant to her, how huge a part of her life it was. She honestly just wanted to get back to normal, to working cases with her team.

She pulled into the parking lot and went up to their offices, almost vibrating with excitement. Chin was working at FRED and turned around when she entered.

Her bright smile was enough to tell him what had happened.

"Cuz!" he exclaimed, meeting her half way down the hall, between Danny and Steve's offices, and wrapped her in a tight embrace.

"I'm so glad you're back," he said quietly.

"Me too," she said back fervently, tears threatening to fall.

She pulled back as the door to Danny's office swung open and shut. She smiled at Danny and he pulled her into a hug as well, but as he talked, she looked over at Steve's office.

She had seen him leap out of his chair as she had hugged Chin. Now he was standing, hands on the table and head hanging down, as if his arms were the only thing keeping him upright. She wondered if he had been worried about her in the eval, cause this was an unusual amount of stress and relief for him to show.

As she released Danny, she heard his door open and turned to look at him.

"Well, Kono? You have something for me?" he asked slyly, a grin on his face.

She smiled back and pulled the envelope from her back pocket. He took it from her and opened it.

"Reinstated to full active duty eh?"

"Yep."

He looked up and smiled brightly, taking a step towards her.

And even after everything, stepping into his strong arms and feeling him hug her tight for a moment, his familiar smell wrapping around her… this was the welcome home she had wanted. This was the real one.

"That's my girl," he whispered to her, just before he pulled back.

He didn't give her time to analyze that though. All she knew was that something in the air between them had changed. Something was _humming_ it seemed, a palpable tension that existed only between their bodies.

"Congratulations, Kono," he said. "I guess that means we actually have to work now."

Chin and Danny groaned but Kono couldn't have been happier.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

The first case went fine.

Kono was given easy jobs, but she wasn't babied. That was just how she wanted it.

The hardest part had been when Steve had dived into the ocean after the suspect. The dumbass had been knocked unconscious and fell off the dock they were chasing him on. He would have drowned if Steve hadn't jumped in.

But all Kono could think was, _holy shit. _

He was wet, his shirt plastered to his ridiculously attractive body and his hair flung back from his face. He had lifted the man out of the water and, even though she had seen his ocean workout routine a billion times before, the way his muscles flexed and stretched his shirt made her far too hot.

When he had caught her eye coming out of the water, she had quickly found a way to make herself useful elsewhere. She might have seen him smirk though.

They had taken the unconscious man back to head quarters and, in typical McGarrett style, used an air horn to wake him up. Where before she had just watched his unorthodox methods in amusement, she now couldn't help seeing a sort of reckless, bad boy attractiveness. She always had had problems with that type of guy.

It felt like every moment they were together – hell, every moment they could see each other at all – the weird tension came back up. It was like everything he did made her think of creepily inappropriate things. She had lived with the guy for three weeks! And all it took was a kiss and a few days apart and now her mind was like a 24/7 Steve McGarrett porn channel.

Luckily, battery-powered toys were made for a reason.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

The second case wasn't so simple and nice.

Henry Sterling was the sleaze bag drug dealer who had started expanding his business. His men had started seducing girls, "dating" them and then slipping them drugs, getting them to loosen up and "have fun". Once they were hooked and couldn't pay anymore, he would force them to work as prostitutes to "pay" for the drugs they needed.

But one of the girls had been tougher than they expected. She escaped and went straight to the police. HPD had taken her statement and then released her to a rehab center. They hadn't gotten anywhere on the case, because Sterling apparently had someone smart working for him to cover his tracks.

But when the girl was released from rehab and found dead the next morning, the case was handed over to Five-0.

Needless to say, this case pissed everyone off.

Steve was more serious than ever, wanting to find the bastard and make him pay. He had that look on that meant he would do anything to get him, even if it involved some very unorthodox methods.

Danny was angry. Any case that involved young girls getting hurt by guys like that made him angry. Maybe he was thinking of Grace and how those girls were someone's daughters too.

Chin walked around the office, cool and contained. But everyone could tell that this case got to him just as much as everyone else. And they all knew that he would happily participate in any of Steve's crazy ass ideas.

It was Kono who had the hardest time though. The fact was that at one time in her life, she could have been one of those girls. She had been a young woman, confident and sure, who hung out at bars when she wasn't in a surf competition.

And within a few days of getting the case, it became obvious that they would need some hard, on site evidence to get this guy.

Kono went dress shopping.


	25. Chapter 25

**EDIT: I'm so sorry that this issue with it sounding like Unlawful Carnal Knowledge came up. There's a really long explanation about how that happened (which I would be happy to explain to anyone who is pissed off/curious) but the important thing is that it was COMPLETELY UNINTENTIONAL. Sidalee, you have my permission to be very very very angry with me. BUT this is a new edited version that hopefully doesn't sound as much like her (although honestly, I didn't edit it that much from the original version that was written back months before I even started this story, so if it still sounds like her, I'm sorry but I tried). Again, I'm SO SORRY.**

**So… this is the chapter y'all have been waiting for (I think). **

**All I'm gonna say is… **

**If you don't like extremely explicit smut, stop reading when it changes to present tense. Start again a bit before the break. **

**And don't hate me. Please? Twists and turns remember? **

**Quote:**

"**But seduction isn't making someone do what they don't want to do. Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they secretly want to do already." – Waiter Rant blog **

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

It was too much.

She hated just admitting that.

But seriously. The cold showers at night weren't helping anymore. She would wake up in the middle of the night and the only way to get back to sleep was to slide her fingers down into her underwear. She found herself screaming Steve's name as she came and wondered if the neighbors could hear.

Cause that wouldn't be embarrassing or anything.

Actually, what would be really embarrassing would be if someone walked into the locker room at the office. Cause sometimes, on days he was being particularly attractive (which was pretty much all the time), she would find herself in there, trying to keep her moans quiet. Sometimes she would end up in there multiple times.

So as she thought about going to bed after preparing herself for the op the next evening by reading the case file for the billionth time, all she could think of was how she needed him.

This would not do.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

"Whatcha doing, isn't like midnight in LA?" Steve asked Mary, on the phone with his sister for the first time since she had left a few weeks ago. He was sitting on his couch in his living room, looking over case files and preparing to have Kono go undercover. He didn't like that it was so soon after her injury, but so be it.

Plus, he couldn't figure out the weird sexual tension thing they had going on. It was like he had this need to push her against a wall and have his way with her, _all the time_. It was really getting to be a problem, one that could only be fixed by getting off and cold showers. Multiple times a day.

"Well, I was going to go see this guy but he stood me up. So I thought I would call and see if you were around," Mary said.

"I'm touched," Steve said sweetly.

"Don't let it go to your head," she joked.

Steve laughed before turning serious again. "Seriously Mer, what's up? You haven't called since you left."

She sighed. "Just missing the islands I guess. You know I haven't thought of them as home in a long time but ever since I visited, I guess I feel more of connection again." She laughed dejectedly. "Wow, that sounds cheesy."

"No it doesn't. I know what you mean. I never really thought of it as home until I came back."

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"Not letting me feel like a sentimental idiot."

He chuckled. "No problem, Mer."

"So how are things going?"

"Good. What about you? Who's this guy who stood you up?"

"Well apparently he's no one and I'm fine. Speaking of seeing someone…" she hinted slyly.

He laughed again. He actually really loved talking with his sister. She could be so funny. "No Mer, I'm not seeing anyone." _Not that there isn't someone I'd like to see,_ he thought.

"Come on Steve! Even you have to settle down sometime! I really don't understand this whole thing with Kono, why don't you just ask her out already?"

"It's complicated…" He paused, as he looked toward the front door, confused. Someone had just knocked. At 10 pm. _Who the hell shows up uninvited at 10 pm? _

He stood and walked over to the door as he talked to Mary. "I'm not particularly interested at the moment." Even as he said it he knew it was a lie.

"Not interested! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Uhh…" he murmured distractedly as he processed the sight in front of him.

Kono stood, one forearm resting against the doorframe, a wine bottle held in her hand.

He looked down and away. "Yeah… can I call you back tomorrow?"

Mary seemed slightly surprised but said, "Sure."

He hung up abruptly, not caring how rude it was. But he had good reason, he thought, as he quickly looked back up.

Kono let her arm fall from the doorframe, stalking towards him. She reached back and shut the door, kicking her flip-flops off as she started to talk.

"I have to go undercover and bring down Henry Sterling without violating his civil liberties." She was walking towards him, a predatory look on her face, forcing him to walk backwards through his living room.

"I can't have any distractions," she said as he stumbled on the coffee table and she placed the wine bottle on it.

"Uhhh okay…" he said, wary but also excited by the things she seemed to be suggesting. He suddenly realized that the backs of his knees were about to hit the leg rest of his couch.

And that predatory look suddenly became one of the sexiest things he had ever seen. She looked calm and collected, with a touch of amusement in her eyes as she watched him fumble. Her voice became quieter and lowered seductively as she purred, "So let's just do this and get it over with."

He sat down on the couch, never breaking eye contact with her. "So we won't be distracted?" he said softly, rather breathlessly, as she straddled his lap with a grin, one forearm coming to rest on his shoulder and the other hand sitting lightly on his waist.

"Outstanding," he breathed, not trusting his voice. She grinned down at him.

Her nose touched his cheek softly, hesitating for a microsecond before she pushed her lips down against his with more determination and resolve than he had expected. Her hand slid to his well-muscled shoulder, pushing him back into the couch. Her kiss turned rough and passionate, she wanted him and she wanted him now. It was more intimate, more intense, even than he had ever imagined, but maybe that was because – _holy fuck_ – this was actually happening.

He didn't know how to react.

He was leaning on his elbows, hands twitching up toward her at his sides. For the first time ever, he thought, he was afraid to touch her, not sure how far he could take this. He quickly opened his mouth to her, fighting back the questions that came with her sudden change in attitude and the moan of pleasure that might push things past her limits.

She slid one hand up his shoulder, dropping it to the couch behind him and separated their bodies, using her arm to support herself as she hovered above him. Her head dipped down to continue to kiss him passionately, her lips smirking against his as he reached up to meet her as well, obviously unwilling to break the kiss. The things her tongue could do…

Suddenly, he was very sure of exactly how far he could take this.

He hadn't been sure what she was intending for them to do tonight. He hadn't been sure how intimate this was going to get. He hadn't been sure if she would let him touch her, let him love her the way he wanted to.

But when she started undoing the buttons of his dress shirt less than a minute after she started kissing him, he suddenly knew what she was here to do.

This was really just a one-night stand, a need to get the sexual tension they had been feeling for weeks off her shoulders, so it didn't get in the way of her work. He was not at all sure that that was a good idea. In fact, he was quite positive it was not. But honestly, he had wanted this for so long and made that perfectly clear to her so many times that he didn't care what happened after this. Yes, he wanted a relationship with her. But even if she didn't want that long-term thing, at least they would know how it felt to be together.

She had gotten his shirt unbuttoned already and he sat up, pulling their bodies flush together as she pushed it down and off his arms. She smiled as he gained confidence. He wanted her. Well, it wasn't like she didn't already know that, but that wasn't the point.

He _wanted _her. _(He desired her in that way that was so much more than sex.)_

He wanted _her. (Somehow, out of all the women he had met, he had chosen her.)_

_He _wanted her. _(She never thought that someone as amazing as him would choose someone as messed up as her.) _

How the hell did she manage that?

When James had left, she had dismissed the idea of ever meeting someone. Not because no one would ever want her. Not because she would never want someone. Not because wanting was somehow out of the picture. But because she didn't think that she would ever want a _relationship_ again. They were messy and complicated and never real.

But now… _he wanted her._

Okay.

So maybe this wasn't the best idea she had ever had.

His hands were exploring her body, fingers splayed across her back, tangled in her hair. He held her tightly, possessively, as if afraid she would run at any moment but the way her knuckles were turning white in a death grip on his shoulders told a different story, one where he was making her want to stay with him until the end of time. The calluses on his fingers were rough against her scalp and heightened the intense pleasure that was all around her, radiating from the points of contact she had with his muscular body. She let her own hands explore, not wanting to let him get control so quickly, when this was her idea. His hands found the bottom of her shirt and began to pull it up, breaking their kiss to pull it over her head.

As he pulled it off and flung it to the ground, their eyes met for a half second. He stared at the flush of her cheeks, the red swollen look of her extremely kissable lips, the tan of her skin and the depth of her eyes. All she saw were his eyes, those bright, mesmerizing ocean blue eyes that always seemed to see straight through her, into the depths of her heart and her emotions. He always knew exactly what she needed.

And she needed him.

She knew that he had figured out that she didn't come here out of love, but lust and desire. And she realized that he really didn't care because he's been just as distracted as her.

Why did that bother her? Why did she suddenly want him to think more of what they are doing? After all it had been her idea. She didn't have any right to want him to be attached when she was purposefully trying to keep this compartmentalized and unmeaning. Yeah, this definitely was not a good idea at all.

But he's kissing her again and she forgets everything.

His lips and tongue dance around hers and his hands are everywhere, exploring her body. How many times has she imagined this while she lay in bed at night? Too many to count, she knows that. She feels the burning need somewhere in her lower abdomen and she knows exactly what she is doing when she pushes him back into the couch.

They're kissing wildly, passionately, their fingers tugging at each other's clothes. He thinks of Danny and the unlocked front door and the way this is so spontaneous with such a lack of foreplay, but she's taken off her bra – _finally _– and he sits up quickly, his mouth meeting her aroused skin.

A gasp turns into a moan from her lips and her head tips back, eyes closed. He looks up at her and marvels at how beautiful she is for a moment, before realizing that she is pushing off his boxers as he lays reverent, open mouthed kisses against her chest and neck. Her skin is flushed, a sheen of sweat making her body slick, and he doesn't think he's ever been so hot in his life.

He belatedly realizes that they're naked and she's pushing him back into the couch again. His hands fall on her hips and run up her sides, along her stomach and back and the way her skin and muscle ripples under his rough, work-hardened fingers is one of the most attractive things he's ever seen. She hopes he never stops touching her like that, because those calluses do the strangest things to her body, make her skin burn, make her want _more_, if that's possible.

She raises her hips and slides onto him and they both moan with the realization and relief that they are _finally _doing this. He swears as she starts to move because –_ oh god _– he's finally inside the woman he's in love with and she's so hot and wet and ready for him and he tries not to come right there.

She rides him like it's the first and last time all wrapped up in one.

It probably is.

But they're not going to think about that right now.

She's making noises, noises she's never heard come out of her before and she throws her head back as her hands run against his muscular chest. He's panting and when she leans forward to kiss his mouth, his chest. She lays open kisses wherever she hits skin and the change of angle makes his gasp and moan and, _god, _it's a _fucking miracle_ he hasn't come yet.

She sits up again and comes suddenly, the way the noises she's making shoot up an octave his first indicator. She digs her nails into his chest and he knows that she'll leave red half-moon marks on him, but he doesn't care, because she's so tight now and all he wants is to come with her.

He flips them over, hitching her leg higher up on his waist so he can drive into her moments after she comes down. He takes his turn to kiss her messily on her mouth, her face, her neck, her chest, nowhere is safe. One hand is roaming her back and she can already feel herself rising again.

She grabs the armrest above her head with one hand to steady herself, to let him drive into her, and her other hand scrambles to find a purchase somewhere, eventually setting on his shoulder. He thrusts into her hard, over and over, and she moans and pants and gasps and this is how he's always imagined it. He wants her under him, lost in a pleasure that is completely his doing. He wants to see this strong woman let go, because of him, for him.

"_Fuck, Steve_," she moans deeply and breathlessly as she comes again and it's too much, she's so tight again and she's so beautiful and he's so in love with her and so he comes right after her.

He tries, he really does, not to collapse on her, but he's pretty sure his body turned to jelly after he came. So he tries to fall only partly on top of her.

They lay there for a moment, trying to cool down, trying to catch their breath.

"Fuck."

It was all she could say and he could not agree more.

But then she raised her arm and tried to run her hand through her hair and he wondered if maybe she meant that in a different way.

"Fuck," she said again, anger and disappointment lacing her voice. "It wasn't supposed to be like this."

"Hmm?" he questions into her shoulder.

"I wasn't supposed to want more," she whispers.

He lifted himself back up on his arms and looked down at her, surprised and hopeful. "Are you saying that you're reconsidering?"

Her look back up at him revealed nothing. She didn't speak for a long moment, just looking at him, her face unreadable.

"What I'm saying is that all I want to do right now is go upstairs to your bedroom and do that all over again."

It wasn't exactly what he wanted. But it was a start.

And he really couldn't think of a better idea right now anyway.

He leaned down and kissed her, softer than before. She tried not to moan but it was too much and she still wanted him so badly. She deepened the kiss and they knew that nothing would ever be enough to satiate this carnal desire for each other. He pulled her quickly off the couch and wrapped an arm around her waist, leading her backward to the stairs, never breaking their passionate kiss.

Somehow they made it up the stairs and she wrapped her legs around his waist, letting him carry her into his bedroom. He threw her on the bed and gazed down at her long, lean body spread out before him. He was sure that he had never seen anything so beautiful before and as she gazed up at him, a small smile on her face, she couldn't think of anything more gorgeous than him either. Then he was on her, kissing her deeply, and time and coherence seemed to disappear.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

She woke up naked in an empty and unfamiliar bed. Except that it wasn't unfamiliar, the way the color of the walls wasn't unfamiliar and the smell was definitely more than slightly familiar.

Because it was Steve's smell, one she knew well, one she had dreamed about. And it was the color of the walls in Steve's house and the bed was definitely the one she had slept in so many times while he had been taking care of her.

And she let her head fall back against the pillows because she had honestly missed the way Steve's bed conformed to her body, the airy softness of his sheets, the sound of the waves coming in from the open balcony door, and most of all the smell. The smell of _him_. The way it wrapped around her, like a protective blanket and made her feel like this, this place where it smelled like him, was home.

She let herself doze slightly after she checked the clock. It was six am and there was no way she needed to be up yet. She was sore (she didn't want to think about how rough things had gotten last night and how likely it was that she had embarrassing bruises) and his bed felt amazing around her. She let her mind drift with the waves as she fluffed the blankets comfortably around her.

She heard the door downstairs open and close a while later and she thought that Steve must be home from what she assumed was his morning run and swim. She briefly considered that she should have left before he came back, to save themselves the awkward conversation. But the worse thing was that he probably would have cornered her at work to ask about it. Work! _Really, the man has no sense of protecting my dignity, _she thought ruefully.

She heard him come up the stairs and feigned sleep, but he only glanced at her once as he dropped what looked like their clothes from the night before on a chair. Then he went into the bathroom and turned on the shower. He was in there for a few minutes (_crazy Navy man,_ she thought) before she heard the water shut off.

And then the door opened and she barely cracked her eyes to see.

_Oh, dear God. _

He walked in, still dripping slightly, with the towel clutched around his waist. He glanced quickly at her, assumed she was still asleep and turned toward the closet, hanging the towel on a hook nearby.

She stared at his perfectly formed naked body as he dressed. She watched the way his body moved fluidly through the monotonous motions.

It might have been a one-night stand, but she wasn't embarrassed. In her opinion, life was too short for that. Particularly in their line of work, when life was, in all probability, going to be pretty short.

By the time he turned around, she had composed her face into an appreciative smirk.

They had a long staring match before he said, "Sorry. I thought you were asleep."

"Not any more…"

He grinned shyly. "Not like you haven't seen it before."

She chuckled softly. "That's for sure." She slid her body to the edge of the bed and flipped the covers off, walking over near where Steve was standing, watching her with appreciative fascination. She pulled on her underwear and bra, sort of wishing he would stop staring. Her shirt was missing so she pulled on her jean shorts and ran her fingers through her hair as she walked out the room, his eyes following her.

Downstairs, she found her shirt pretty much under the couch. She heard Steve follow her, grab a half-empty cup of coffee off the kitchen counter and then watch as she slid her shirt on. She went over to her shoes near the front door.

"You could stay for breakfast," he said hopefully, moving towards her as she slipped on the flip-flops.

"I've got to go get ready for work. Insertion prep before tonight, remember?"

He nodded, disappointed. "Yeah, I get it."

She looked at him, pausing at the front door. "You know that this was just a one time thing, right?"

She was completely denying the fact that they both knew that this once wouldn't be enough.

She watched as he fiddled with his coffee mug, looking down into it and swallowing hard. She had never seen him more… what? Hurt? Nervous? He almost never showed emotion, even with her, so she didn't really know.

Suddenly he looked up. "I'm not gonna lie to you, Kono," he said in a much stronger voice than she had been expecting. "I care about you. If you were willing to give us a chance, I would fight for us. But if not…" He swallowed again, glancing down quickly. "If not, then it was a really good night."

She was taken aback. She took a deep breath, trying to center herself before she spoke. "Steve, I'm your subordinate. It's completely inappropriate, it could jeopardize our credibility and ruin my career. I'm not going to risk all that." She frowned with confusion and let the irrational anger bubble up, creating a protective shield around her heart. "You should know all that Steve. The fact that you are even considering a relationship with me is just… wrong, on so many levels."

He smiled a small, hurt smile. "I can't help it, Kono. The heart wants what the heart wants. I can't do anything about it, but if you can… good for you."

And she couldn't.

Deep down, she knew that she was in love with him, had been for a while and always would be. But her reasons, her logic that she had spent hours, days considering was too good and too accurate to ignore.

They couldn't be together. It was as simple as that.

So she simply said, "I'm sorry." And then she slipped out the front door, got in her car and went home to get ready for the insertion that evening.

H5-0 * H5-0 * H5-0

He sighed as the door clicked shut and he heard her car pull out. He knew that she was technically right. It would look bad if they were together.

But he hadn't lied. Not to himself and not to her.

She was the one who was lying.

He knew that she felt it too. The deep connection. The feeling that wherever the other was, was home. It was right.

He wasn't a mind reader and he couldn't see inside Kono's car as she drove away.

He didn't see when she sighed and felt the tears start to well in her eyes.

He didn't see when she had to pull over only a few blocks from his house because the tears were coming too fast.

"Damn it!" she said quietly to herself, hitting the steering wheel with both hands and then resting her forehead against it, hands on either side of her head.

She let herself cry. It was the only thing she could do. She had to get it out, let it go.

If only he had noticed how hard it was for her to leave, to gather her courage to walk out of that house that was so him, and therefore so comforting and home-like. Why couldn't he see that she hated leaving that wonderful space, where they were together (which felt so right, it should be illegal) to go back to her empty, lonely little apartment? It felt so obvious to her and she felt like she was doing a horrible job of hiding it, but he couldn't see it.

Why hadn't he stopped her? Told her, forced her to admit that she had feelings for him.

But that one was obvious. He was too much of a gentleman. He wanted to give her all the time and space she needed. He wanted her to never regret their relationship.

Which told her just how much he loved her.

She hit her forehead gently against the steering wheel. She could just turn around, go back, tell him everything. She could see it now: a confession, his surprise, then more mind blowing, but tender and passionate sex. They would walk into work, holding hands and laughing together…

And there it was. Smack in front of her face. The title read: Why One Cannot Date A Coworker. Because then they lose all professionalism and credibility and their feelings get in the way.

"Motherfucking, stupid ass reasons!" she yelled to herself, sitting up and hitting the steering wheel hard. "I just want to be with him! I lo–"

She snapped her traitor mouth shut, sitting up straight and instantly calming herself. She would not say that word. Saying it out loud, even just to herself, would require actually admitting it to herself.

She wasn't prepared for that.

She took several deep, shaky breaths and wiped her face before pulling away from the curb.

She might go to the gym and duke it out with the punching bag before work.


End file.
